And what if I said I loved you?
by Twilight's-Mystery
Summary: Check out the last chapter for an Authors Note, an explanation, a declaration and a proclamation because I needed something else that ended with ation
1. Default Chapter

And what if I said I loved you?  
  
Chapter 1: " Not the best of days."  
  
By: Kathy M. Kidman  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own Hey Arnold, Craig Bartlett does, but the plot I do, I think it's pretty original, I haven't actually..read every single hey arnold fic, but the ones I have aren't gunna have what I do, but if there are some out there that do...I'm sorry..  
  
AN: Being the few words of a story that I'll have written since March 31st ** it's now the 9th ** I'm praying that this will get me over my writers block. I've read darn near 200 " Hey Arnold " stories, so I'm pretty sure I can keep the people In character for now..heh, although I am very..very...complex writer..or so I've been told, my stories aren't short (( which will probably anger some people..)) shortest chapter I've written is 13 pages long...umm or 7 if you have small text...but I digress, this will be a big story I hope, considering when listening to " Hold me " by savage garden, I get lost in my writings, so be prepared for an in detail, ** and stupid in my opinion ** first ever hey arnold fanfic by me..  
Enjoy...  
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It was another " perfect " morning at the pataki house-hold, pfft! yeah, sure, The real jist is, as usual Big Bob was gone to work, and I woke up with 10 minutes to get ready for school..  
' Crimeny!! did Mirium TOTALLY forget about school? ' I thought bitterly to myself throwing on my usual outfit, threw my hair up into pigtails, and topped it off with..the pink bow that * sighs * my beloved so adores..or atleast did when we were 3.  
  
" MIRIUM!! Why didn't you wake me up this morning? Ca-rimeny! I do have to go to school ya know!" I shouted as I ran down the stairs and into the kitchen where..surprise surprise, I found mirum have asleep with a strawberry smoothy in her hand..  
  
' oh pa-lease!' I thought angrily and looked around. " mom?! where's my lunch--" I started but heard the bus getting closer ' forget it ' i thought and grabbed my backpack and ran out of the house to catch the bus, and barely made it.  
  
I sat down moodily next to my best friend phoebe and she looked over at me cheerfully.  
  
" Salutations Helga!" she smiled  
  
I merely sighed and then replied " hey phoebes, what's up?" and with that, my day brightened slightly.  
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After we got to school phoebe said " Ja Ne." and ran off to find her other friends..  
  
Really phoebe was the only person I could talk to about my problems, and..obsessions..well next to Dr. Bliss, but that's another story..  
  
The bell rang symbolizing the beginning of school and everybody ran to class, I pushed kids out of my way and into lockers. " Shove over buddy.." escaping my mouth every so often..  
  
As I turned the corner I collided with somebody and fell over.  
  
" Why don't you watch your going next time!!" I started but gasped at who the other victim was. " Arnold?!" I gasped and then slapped myself " Watch where you're going football head! Next time, don't be so darn clumsy! Ca-rimeny!" I picked myself up and my backpack, as did Arnold.   
  
" Whatever you say Helga, I'm sorry.." he muttered half heartedly.  
  
At which point I heard a very small thud on the ground and saw my pink notebook fall right next to arnolds foot. I let out an inaudible gasp " here let me.." he started and just as he picked it up, my eyes widened as it was open to the page that I had just written that last night. ' oh no! he cannot read that!!' I thought and snatched it away from him just as he started to read it.   
  
" Leave my stuff alone FOOTBALL head!" I said evily, and stomped off towards class..only stopping around teh next corner to pull out my locket.  
  
Looking at the picture of the blonde haired angel in my hands, my heart flutterd and my stomache turned..   
  
" Oh, my dear, sweet arnold, why must I torture myself so, why must I berate you..why can't I just come out of this anti-social bully shell and announce my love for you to the world. " I started to talk again, but trailed off as I heard a familiar wheezing behind me and I punched Brainy and stomped off to class.  
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As the kids sat down, I took my usual seat, as did Arnold, and I sat down and stared dreamily towards him, but as he turned around, I quickly made a spitball and threw it at him, he sighed and turned back around..  
  
I sighed with relief and looked at him again, and just before I got a chance to doze.. " Alright class, today we are going to start our science projects, I have parterns as so.. " Gerald your with phoebe.."   
  
I looked over to see her blushing..  
  
" Harold, your with Nadine...Eugene you're with..Rhonda.."   
  
" WHAT?!" she screached..   
  
" Rhonda, it won't be so bad, eugene has great idea's when it comes to science.. " assured Rhonda who just whined softly.  
  
Arnold sat quietly pleading. ' please not helga, please not helga, please not helga..'   
  
" Arnold your with helga.." said Mr. Simmons.  
  
" no!!" he cried out and Gerald gave him a sympathetic look whilest my heart soard, I felt as if I could float away to cloud 9..  
  
" Stinky your with Lila.."  
  
" oh that would be every so nice.." she replied and they moved their stuff together..  
  
Mr. Simmons contiuned on the last few groups, in which there was one group of three boys and a group of two girls..  
  
and that was all, everybody moved their desks together.  
  
And arnold came over and sat down next to me with a miserable look ...so I decided to go easy on the teasing today..  
  
I looked at him smiling a little.. " So, ah..arnold, I guess we are partners huh?"  
  
He glared at me and huffed. " Yeah well...Good for us!" he grumbled..  
" and don't worry..I won't touch any of your stuff, wouldn't wanna have to answer to old betsy.." he snapped rudely and pulled his books out.  
  
My heart sunk and I fell from my cloud and flinched both inwardly and outwardly, but covered up my beaten heart as he looked up.  
  
" Look---Arnoldo! I don't like this Pairing annymore than YOU do..So let's just get our work done and move on with our stinkin lives alright?!?" I shot back with more Vehemn than planned, but a bit of hurt pride came out and he looked up surprised.  
  
The hurt sound had caught him off-guard, well it caught me off guard too.. and when he looked up I stammered..." I-I--I...look I'm sorry for even saying anything to YOU arnold.." I said miserably, hoping it came off as sarcasm.  
  
He caught the misery and sighed.. " No, it's my fault, you were trying to be nice and I snapped, I'm sorry.." he replied and after a while of getting our subject we worked, an unnerving silence befalling the two of us.  
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Morning passed quickly and lunch finally came.  
  
And after our incident in 1st hour me and Arnold pretty much avoided eachother, I ended up a bit sad afterwards, I knew my chances with arnold were as slim as it would get, and my rudeness helped about..zilch..  
  
After sitting down, remembering mom forgot lunch again I sat down at the usual table and got so lost in thought I didn't even hear phoebe say my name as she sat down..that is till she waved her hand infront of me.  
  
" Yoohoo...helga..hey helga? you there??" she asked..  
  
" Wha--??" I shook my head to clear the fuzz.. " oh, hey phoebes.." I said softly.  
  
" Helga? What's the matter? you seemed rather downtrodden all through the morning.." she said concern plain in her voice.  
  
" Nothing, just completely ruining my life as usual.." I said a little bit louder.  
  
" What do you mean helga?" She asked confused.  
  
" What do I mean?!?" I repeated, my feelings bunching up, I had to let out some steam.. " I mean, I am a total loser with only my hurt pride and Anti-social behavior with.." I lowered my voice.. " an obsession to kill on a certain football head and I'm too darn chicken to admit it!" I started up again but Phoebe interrupted me..  
  
" helga.."   
  
" huh? "  
  
" you're babbling again.." she pointed out as she realized I had raised my voice, and one or two people were looking at me as I had stood up.  
  
" Oh, thanks Phoebes.." I said and sat down a blush creeping up my face..  
  
" No problem..hey, were's your lunch helga? Mom forget it again?" she asked..  
  
I rolled my eyes.. " yeah, I found mirium in the kitchen this morning, after waking up late, a strawberry smoothie in her hand and her head on the table, she looked drunk." I exclaimed..but sighed annoyed.   
  
" oh, would you like my tapioca? " she offered, I smiled but shook my head.   
  
" Nah, not too hungry.." and we continued to talk..  
  
While a few tables off, Arnold and a few of the others were talking about the days events..  
  
" Did you see Eugene fall head first into the blue paint in artclass today Arnold? Oh it was soooo funny!!" said Harold through a mouth full of pizza..  
  
" No Harold, I didn't see Eugene fall in the blue paint.." said arnold devoid of feeling..  
  
" well, I did! and when he got back up there was paint everywhere!! and then he took a step back and slipped into the red paint! everybody was laughing so hard!" he added..  
  
" Yeah well don't forget who laughed so hard they slammed their hands right into the Black ink!" pointed out sid as everybody laughed at the fact that Harold still had ink on his hand..  
  
" How was I spose to know it was there!!" he whined and bits of food flew out of his mouth.  
  
Gerold looked over to Arnold and raised an eyebrow..." what's up man, why so down? the Helga thing really gettin to ya??" he asked.  
  
" Well, I darn reckon Arnolds got the worst off in class, what with havin to be with helga and all.." stinky said and Sid pointed out.  
  
" Yeah, I'll bet if you guys don't get an 'A' she'll right pound your face in Arnold " said sid laughing.  
  
" ooh..I'm so scaaredd.." mocked Harold and made a face which made everybody, but arnold, laugh..  
  
I looked over as I heard the louder part of the conversation, and anger boiled over, but I remembered what Dr. Bliss told me about controlling my anger and doing something constructive, so while Phoebe went to go dump her tray and get a snack I pulled out my a small blue note book and started to write down how I felt. I had taken up 3 pages by the time Phoebe came back and by then I was calm again..  
  
' i don't understand why I'm letting those geeks's comments get to me, it's not like their opinions matter or anything..' I thought to myself..  
  
Arnold on the otherhand spoke quietly. " I think I hurt her feelings.."   
  
" He speaks.." mentioned sid, and gerald looked at him.  
  
" Man, are you crazy?? Helga G. Pataki?? hurt her feelings?! She doesn't even HAVE feelings man! " he said rolling his eyes..  
  
" No, I mean it, you didn't hear the way she replied to my short tempered remark.. " said Arnold..  
  
" What do you mean?" asked sid and stinky at the same time..  
  
" She sounded...I don't know, hurt..not just mean.." he finished but before the others got around to hounding him about it any further the bell rang and everybody went to afternoon classes...  
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Finding us at the end of the day for the weekand 3 hours later everybody scattered and once on the bus, instead of sitting by me like phoebe usually would, she went and sat with Gerald. Which was just fine with me, I needed some time to think.  
  
Me and arnold had agree'd in rather..merky waters to meet at his house the next day to work on our project..no way was I gunna put him through torture of big bob pataki..so I skipped baseball and got off the bus..I'm pretty sure everybody on the bus could hear the booming of dad's voice from inside, I noticed Olga's car in the garage and prayed nobody saw my flinch..  
  
So I walked up the steps and inside to brace hurricane bob..  
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Arnolds POV  
  
As the bus pulled away, I turned, but not before seeing Helga flinch at her dad's yelling.. ' sounded like he was mad, wonder whats up..' I thought to myself and made a mental note to ask her tomorrow..  
  
Anyways, I watched as Phoebe got off on her stop the the rest of us got off near gerald field and we teamed up and started to play..  
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Helga's POV  
  
I opened the door quietly and closed it even more so, I could tell that dad was mad when even from upstairs and into my room.. ** which I luckily made too without being caught or anything, then again, why would I eve be noticed around this joint! ** I went to my window and looked out as the wind carried some of the past falls leaves passed my window and sighed..  
  
I decided to go see what was getting Big Bob all riled up, so I snuck down stairs and into the hallway near the living room.  
  
' uh oh..' I snickered.. ' he's really peeved! the vein over his left eye is twitching..' i noted and peered in even further..  
  
" Of all things merciful Mirium!! You cannot leave me here with The girl!!" I heard..  
  
I muttered something dark then groaned.   
  
" Oh, don't worry honey, olga's here as well, she can play piano for you.." muttered mom a pineapple smoothie in her hand and a suitcase in her other.  
  
" Oh, don't worry mummy, I'll take care of daddy and helga just fine while your visiting grams and gramps in louisiana.." piped up olga..  
  
I mocked her silently and just before I walked in I heard him grumble and then walked out of the room and passed me..  
  
" Well, I'm NOT gunna be stuck around here, thank grace I'm going to a buisness convention in Miami for the week.."   
  
"Business conventions are important because they demonstrate how many people a company can operate without" I said outloud walking into the room..  
  
" Now you pipe down little missy, it's going to be you, and your sister for the week, so don't get into ANY trouble got it??" he growled, obviously in a bad mood..  
  
I raised an eyebrow and felt the sudden urge to hurl...' oh great, a whole week with oolllga...' I sighed..  
  
" Oh don't worry bob, I'll be good, if you come back maybe I'll be lucky enough to be dead and buried 10 feet under.." I said sarcastically..  
  
" Now..helga, don't worry, you'll have fun, you and your sister can--bond.." said mirium as she stumbled to the door and bob stomped out after her.  
  
" Just don't mess anything up!" ordered bob..  
  
" Oh no not me.." I said faking innocent eyes but when I left I stuck my tongue out..and Olga ran up to me.  
  
" Oh!!!! My darling baby sister!! " she picked me up in a hug and I sighed..  
  
" hey olga.." I rolled my eyes..  
  
" So.." she said pulling me into the living room.." what have you been doing this past few months since I've been gone??" She asked in her cheerful voice..  
  
" Most of the time I didn't have much fun. The rest of the time I didn't have  
any fun at all." I said sarcastically and she just giggled..  
  
" well, you'll never guess what?" she squeeled..  
  
" What?" I asked devoid of feeling..  
  
" I got a job here as a nurse up at the hospital!! Isn't that great? so now when you get check ups..after May 10th, I'll be able to help you.." she giggled.  
  
' Oh..please..' I thought to myself.." Great..great.." then i pulled from her hug and got up.." Look, olga, it's been great to talk but, umm I feel like going for a walk for now, I'm going now.." and, after getting my pink book, and my blue one, I stomped out the door.  
  
Leaving Olga clueless but she smiled and cheerfully ran into the kitchen...  
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Arnolds POV  
  
During the baseball game my team was down by 1 and I was up to bat. " Come on Arnold! it's the 9th inning!! You're the last to bat! don't let us down man!!" called gerald from 3rd base, and the others chorused in agreement.  
  
" Alright Arrrnnoolldd get ready for the big bad ball, don't let it hit you.." teased Harold and I gritted my teeth..   
  
" JUST pitch Harold!" and he did, and I had to duck he threw it so hard..  
  
" Watch where you're throwing that Harold!" I called as I got up..  
  
" Ooh..is awnold mad??" he rolled his eyes..  
  
" just pitch.." I grumbled..  
  
He looked at me and threw it, and I smacked it..it was a definate homerun..  
as everybody cheered we made our way around the bases, and as I made it to homebase we heard a cry and then a splash..  
  
" what?" and then I heard an erruption of laughter..  
  
I looked over to see who everybody was laughing at, figuring it was Eugene who had ran to get the ball, but I saw Helga, she had a dazed look on her face, and she looked furious, but also that hurt look passed her face..nobody else noticed it, i could tell..  
  
" Great job arnold!!" said Gerald running over to me and patting my back.   
" You smacked Helga G. Pataki straight into the mud! oh that was great!!" he cheered..  
  
Harold piped up. " Yeah!! that'll teach her to be the bully she is!" and he let out a loud. " HAAA HAAA..." and fell over laughing..  
  
I saw fists clench like she was about to run over and beat up harold, but as she stood up, dripping with mud and water, she caught my eye and quickly turned the other way, and I watched as she closed her eyes, threw the ball as hard as she could back towards the field and took off in another direction than the one she was going..   
  
Suddenly there was a loud thud and Eugene fell into the cooler.. " i'm ok.." and I watched helga run away...I couldn't understand it, but something was wrong..  
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Helga POV  
  
Drats!! Arnold saw me..did he see the tears that had started to fall from my eyes..I hope not.  
  
I ran as fast as my 9 year old legs would carry me to the park, where in the 10 minutes it took me it had started to rain slightly.  
  
I ran to the tree house and climbed up, wet, but thankful my dress was not muddy anymore, and I curled up in the far corner of the outside, watching the rain pick up, I pulled out my pink note book and a poem suddenly crept into my head..  
  
" What if I said I loved you?  
Would you say you love me too?  
Or would you turn me away  
Scorn me as I have you?  
Why can't I bring myself to say  
How I feel about you?  
Why do I close up and hide from you?  
What if I asked you to help me?  
Would you be there in my time of need?  
Pulling me from my depths of despair,  
Would you help me, show me you somehow still care?  
Even after those times, when I would so often  
Berate you, trip you, laugh at you  
and call you names..  
But now butterness and silence, i hate it..  
I just need a reason to stay  
In this cruel and unforgiving world, to know that  
Even in the times that I've hurt you  
You could find redemption and relieve  
my soul of the torment and pain I've felt  
for so long....  
Oh my beloved angel..  
What if I said I loved you? "  
  
After I was done I reread that and made a face.. " where did that come from?" I asked myself, but didn't care..yeah like my life was good enough to care about?  
  
I thought for god knows how long..  
  
And I climbed down from the tree and sat down at the base and pulled my legs up to my chest and started to cry softly, why I didn't know..I just felt the need to cry..  
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Arnolds POV  
  
After everybody settled down, and the rain started we broke up the rest of the game and everybody ran home, Gerald started back towards his house, and I started towards the way helga ran..  
  
" Arnold, where you going??" he called after me.  
  
" I have to do something Gerald, I'll...call ya later!"   
  
He raised an eyebrow at me and then shrugged. " Whatever, see ya.." and we separated..  
  
I quickly ran to her house and knocked on the door..Half expecting Big bob I was definatly surprised at the person to open the door..  
  
" oh...you must be one of Helga's little friends..." said Olga..  
  
I smiled and nodded. " Yeah, um..is helga here??" I asked..  
  
Shaking her head she replied. " No..she said she was going out, but it's raining pretty hard, I hope she's alright, I hope nothing's happened to her.." suddenly she got a worried expression on her face..  
  
" No..I doubt it, um..I'm pretty sure I know where she is, I'll go get her and bring her back ok?? don't worry olga.." I reassured..  
  
She sniffled and squeeked. " thank you.." and I ran down the stairs and towards the park.  
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Thinking to myself, ' if I needed time away from my family or anything, I know right where I'd go, maybe helga would go there too..' I thought, reffering to our tree house and just as I got up into the park and towards the tree house, I heard sniffling..   
  
' huh??' I got a confused look on my face and walked around the side of the tree and saw a site I NEVER in my 9 years thought I'd see...Helga G. Pataki, curled up crying..  
  
" Helga??" I put my hand on her shoulder gently..  
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Helga's POV  
  
My heart stopped and I froze in horror as I realized I wasn't alone, and it was my beloved Arnold, but he, of all people was NOT spose to see me at my weakest point.  
  
I jerked away from him and rubbed my eyes, praying I didn't look as pathetic at olga did when SHE cried..  
  
I felt him hesitate then heard him sigh..   
  
" Look Helga, I'm sorry about..snapping at you eariler, and about everything else, especially the baseball incident..the guys were real jerks to laugh at you." he said and I let my shoulders relax and my head came up  
  
" It's not your fault arnold.. " My voice was wavering and very soft..  
  
" Who's fault was it.." he asked gently..   
  
" Oh, well you know my great family life.. " I said sarcastically.  
  
We've talked a bit about our problems, so I never really had troubles telling him about Big Bob or Mirium..but this time, well I just didn't want to tell him anything, he seemed miserable in the first place this morning..Not like he needed any of MY problems on his shoulders..  
  
" Well..I don't know all the details, but is there anything you wanna talk about?" he asks as he sits down next to me.  
  
I tense up at the thought of sharing my thoughts with him, but..I guess since nobody else was around to listen..  
" Big Bobs gottena bit...annoying as of late..at least he's gone most of the time..But it's the times that he's home that really bug me, he's constantly complaining and yelling about anything..IE, after school.." I said making a face.  
  
Arnold nodded and a clap of thunder and flash of lightning made me jump..  
  
At that he looked around.. " Oh yeah, by the way, your sister's really worried about you..I told her I'd find you and bring ya home. " he added.  
  
I was about to say something when I sneezed. " Crimeny, I'm catching a cold.." I muttered then rubbed my head where the baseball had not too long ago smacked me in the back of the head.  
  
He stood up.. " Come on helga, let's get you home ok??" he asked offering me his hand.  
  
I looked at him for a minute, his innocent face, those jelly bean half lit eyes, his features all so...perfect.. " I--I--sure, ok." I sighed and took his hand and he helped me up..  
  
And with that we ran all the way home..  
  
Upon returning I realized we were still holding ahnds and my defensive shell came back.. " Alright football head, I'm not a baby I can stand on my own ya know. " I said and he turned to me with a surprised glance..   
  
He looked at me and I shrugged and opened the door..  
  
Realizing how rude I sounded I looked over my shoulder before going in and asked.. " Hey...arnold, wanna come in?"   
  
He shook his head.. " No helga.." his voice a bit..strange, I guess he thought I meant to be mean again..  
" I'd better get home..see you tomorrow..remember 2:30.." and with that he waved and left.  
  
I walked in only to be bombarded by the human worrier..olllga..   
  
" OOhhh!!! Helga, my poor baby sis!! I was soo soo soo worried about you, thank goodness your little boyfriend arnold came looking for you...he promised to get you back.."  
  
" Ca-Rimeny Olga, I'm fine.." then it sunk in what she said.. " he was looking for me? "   
  
She nodded and laughed.. " yeah, it was so cute, he looked worried..  
  
I rolled my eyes and ran up stairs, shutting my door and sighing I changed into a pink night shurt and white stretch pants, letting my hair down I layed down hoping for a good night sleep..  
  
Though I caught sight of the clock by my bed... " 9:29" early? sure? bad day..definatly..  
  
And with that last thought I drited to sleep...  
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Well, how was that for my first chapter?? please I need some sort of feedback..thank you and umm..that poem that helga wrote, that was my own little creation, I know it sucks, but hey don't be too harsh, flames, compliments, critisizem will ALL be cherished!!  
  
Just please review, and please, stay tooned..I think this is going to take a strange turn...  



	2. " It's good to know you care "

And if I said I love you?  
  
Chapter 2: " It's good to know you care "  
  
By: Kathy M Kidman  
  
Disclaimer: * stardards go here, add any you want to see.. *  
  
AN: Boy when inspiration hits..it really hits no??  
This is going to hopefully going to be better than chapter 1,..but you know how I am..well no you don't..but--ah, whatever nevermind Please just enjoy the fic   
anyways, to those who read and reviewed my first chapter..thank you for your comments! So now, here's the second chapter of.. " And if I said I love you?"  
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The next morning I woke up to a chillingly sweet voice...  
  
" Helga, baby sister, come on..upity up! time for a nice nutritious breakfast to start your day."   
  
This was one of the reasons I despised Olga, besides the fact she was ...perrrfect   
Do you know what time it was??  
  
Groaning, and couging a little I looked through groggy eyes at the clock beside my bed. " Ollgaa!!! It's only 7:22 in the morning! leave me alone till noon or something.." and I tossed the covers back over my head in attempts to get some sleep.  
  
" Oh, non-sense little sis!" she said and she pulled the covers back and I growled slightly, my hair was now probably a mess, but I decided not to bother with it for now..  
  
She giggled.. " Come on now sis, time for breakfast, come on down stairs after you've changed.." she said and closed the door..  
  
For a second I pondered going back to bed and forgetting anything else, but I looked at my bed and realized.. ' I'm up, so let's forget the whole freakin view of sleeping till noon like a regular 9 year old..'   
  
And I through on some clothes, brushed my hair quickly, leaving it slightly curly, which annoyed me, so I put it back up into my usual pigtails and then went down stairs, muttering the whole way..  
  
Upon reaching the dining room I looked around. " Olga?" I asked..  
  
She peered into the dining room.. " Why, goodmorning helga, I'm glad to see you stayed up.." and she brought in a plate of pancakes, bacon, eggs and toast.   
  
' Sakes alive, that's more food I've seen come out of that kitchen then I've seen in a long time!' " Olga, you really didn't have to make all that, I'm a very lite eater.." I said as i sat down..  
  
" Oh nonsense little sis, I just love the feeling of Culinary art in the morning! besides, I know you have a big day today, working on that project or something with your little boyfriend arnold.." she sat down smiling..  
  
" HE is NOT my boyfriend, why would I wanna date a FOOTBALL HEAD like arnoldo!" I said defensively, and prayed it came out as sarcasm.  
  
" Oh..my dear baby sister, we must work on your manners...." she said but started to eat and I muttered something about blondes and then started to eat as well...  
  
About 25 minutes later.. I got up.. " look, olga, I'd love to stick around but.." then I realized just how early it was and groaned.. ' only 7:50..' I thought miserably, and the next basebally game aint till 10:00..  
  
" Helga, why don't you help me wash dishes then, maybe I could help you with your homework?" she asked in that sing-song voice..  
  
Spend time with olga?! this is gunna be pure torture! I'll--I..have to, I've nothing better to do.  
  
I scowled slightly and then replied. " Fine..We'll do the that, but at 10:00 I'm outta here for the day."   
  
" Oh goodie!! then tonight when I get back from my apprenticeship at the hospital maybe we can watch movies. " she said giggling..  
  
" Oh no sister..I am NOT watching some sissy movies all night! " ' I'd rather take a science test.' I grumbled.  
  
She got a pleading look. " oh please helga?? for your big sis??"   
  
I got a distgusted look on my face " FINE!" I angrily replied.. ' great, forced to see her when I first wake up, then before I go to bed, what's she trying to do? bond??" I thought but we went to work  
***********************************************************************  
Arnolds POV ( 7:50 )  
  
Opening my eyes and looking at the clock that read ' 7:50 ' I look up at the sky through my roof..blue tinted with light purple, the effects of probably an astounding sunrise..the few puffy clouds in the sky floated by as if without a care in the world..  
  
Rolling over I thought of the past day's events. Besides the fact that, during school Big Bob and grandpa had gotten into yet another argument. I look back on, the argument me and helga had, then at lunch, the baseball game.. Everything that had happened, and the fact that helga didn't beat up every last one of the people on the field yesterday for laughing at her proves there's something up, or she's not all that bad as she seems to be.  
  
* knock knock knock *  
  
Come on!! it's so early! i thought..   
  
" You up short man? " said grandpa opening the door.  
  
" Yeah.." I muttered.   
  
" Good, breakfast is up..pookies serving pancakes..be careful though, there was a bunch of flies around earlier, and now they're gone.." he mumbled walking downstairs.  
  
I made a face and then went downstairs. Walking into the kitchen I found all the boarders scept oskar and susie at the table.  
  
" morning everyone, morning grandma.." I greeted taking my seat.  
  
" Morning Tex.." was grandma's usual greeting..  
  
I sat down and she served us up.. and about 10 or 15 minutes of arguing and chatter and a fight over who would get the last sausage, which of course, after oskar had come down resulted in him getting his hand stabbed with a fork by grandpa. I stood up..  
  
" Breakfast was great.." and went back upstairs changed and then got out my math.  
  
Flipping on some music I sat down at my desk and started to work.  
***********************************************************************  
Helgas POV  
  
After going through english and social studies, which to my surprise went quick enough for me, it was 9:30 and I took my chance to escape and headed towards gerald field..though I wasn't too sure just how much I wanted to be there anymore.  
  
By 9:50 I was there and so was a bunch of the others, even phoebe and nadine..  
  
" Hey Phoebes.." I greeted with a small smile.  
  
She grinned and ran over. " Greetings Helga."  
  
Suddenly I heard..  
  
" Hey helllllgaaa!!" and I turned around to see harold walking towards me.  
  
" What do YOU want pink boy?" I snapped, the memories of yesterday's events flooding back.  
  
" Hope you don't get hit in da head wif da bawwll.." he laughed. " HAAA HAAA.." and then sid started in..  
  
" Hey look who I am!" and he smacked himself in the head with the ball he'd been holding and fell to the ground and everybody started to laugh..even phoebe giggled slightly..at which point I started to get a little peeved  
  
" Gee..Helga, I didn't think you'd come back for another round of abuse.." said gerald walking up to the field.  
  
" Got a bump on your head hewga?" mocked sid, and the anger that had been slowly rising snapped and him being the closest, and near a wall, with lightning fast reflexes I picked him up by the collar of his shirt and pushed him up against the wall..  
  
Everybody gasped and some muttered about a fight..   
  
" Would you like to say anything else..nose boy?" he shook his head slowly, but I just glared at him anger and evil plain in my eyes..  
  
He had a look of fear in his eyes and then before I punched him into next friday's math test..  
  
" Helga! Stop!" came a familiar shout from some-where behind me.  
  
My eyes flickered emotions then returned to the death stare I had on sid. " what do YOU want football head? " I snapped  
  
" Don't beat sid up helga, please?" he said and came up beside me.  
  
And stinky called out. " aww come on arnold! we wanna see a good fight!"  
  
" Yeah, why shouldn't I arnoldo." i replied eyes still on sid, but a bit of pained anger in my voice.  
  
He said calmly.. " I know you're really angry about yesterday, everybody was totally immature to laugh at you. " he glanced around at the others.  
  
" So? what's your point?"  
  
" My point is..he's not worth your energy." he finished.  
  
My grip remained strong for a few anguished and silent seconds before my fist dropped and my grip on sid loosened, letting him fall to the ground and backing away.  
  
I heard him mutter. ' thank god..' and rolled my eyes..  
  
" Come on guys, let's just play ball.." arnold called, but turned to me and smiled reassuringly..  
  
A strange look past my face and we ran over and picked teams, and the game commenced.  
  
And when it was my turn to hit, Harold was of course pitching..I got a mischievious glint in my eyes, and as he pitched it, I swung and it flew out of the field, only to hit an oncoming semi and flew back and smacked Eugene in the back of the head, into the trashcans behind him..   
  
A muffled. " i'm ok.." floated up and everybody snickered.   
  
Not to mention we got a double play...  
  
Arnold was up to bat as well and i called out. " This time football head watch where your hitting that ball!"   
  
He rolled his eyes and Harold pitched and he missed the first ball..  
  
" Come on Arnold! Hit the ball!" gerald called out from the bench.  
  
" Alright, throw the ball Harold.." he said..  
  
" Are you sure you don't wanna let somebody else pitch? the ball could hurt you.." Harold sneered..  
  
" Just pitch pink boy!" I called out and he grumbled and pitched and arnold hit it down second base, and of course eugene, who had some how managed to play outfield, collided with sid and they both went down and our team won, 3-1.  
***********************************************************************  
Arnolds POV  
  
After the game, it was about 1:00, considering we had to break in order to get Eugene patched up after a few accidents.  
  
I had decided to go to the arcade with sid and the gang. " Remember helga, 2:30.." I said and she rolled her eyes.  
  
" Yeah yeah I know Arnoldo, I won't be late don't worry." she called out and started back towards her house phoebe and nadine close behind.  
  
I began to wonder if maybe the helga I saw last night wasn't just the result of a bad day, but I was pretty sure that wasn't true..or atleast I hoped..  
  
" Come on Arnold let's go! They got a new racing game in, let's get there before anybody else does." called Gerald and i shook my head and ran after them..  
  
" Coming guys!" and we took off.   
  
Sid and Gerald talked about the day at school friday, and just how stupid Eugene looked with the red and blue paint. And about the projects and what we were gunna do.   
  
" Man, my mom said she was in the store yesterday and she heard your grandpa and Big Bob really going at it. She didn't get quite close enough to hear, but she knew they were really mad. " Said Gerald.  
  
" I know Gerald, grandpa was in a horrible mood when I first got home, muttering about how bob was a cheating scum bag or something, but after a while he got better.." I said..  
  
" Heh, I wonder what the fighting was about." we said and then got to the arcade. Of course being the first ones there, we went to the new racing game and started to play.   
***********************************************************************  
Helga's POV  
  
" So Phoebe, I guess you and hair boy are partners for the project huh?" I asked elbowin her slightly and Nadine giggled.  
  
Phoebe blushed. " Yea we are, nothing big.." she replied..  
  
" Oh come on Phoebe, anybody who was paying attention saw you blush when Mr. Simmons said you and Gerald were placed as partners." added Nadine.  
  
" Whatever are you implying Nadine?" asked Phoebe.  
  
But before phoebe could get her to answer we came upon nadine's place and she ran up the stairs. " see you guys at school monday!" and she ran inside..  
  
" what do you think she meant Helga?" asked Phoebe.  
  
" Oh, nothing phoebe's just idle chatter, you know.." I said and grinned, and then we came up to her house..   
  
" Would you like to come in for a while Helga?" she asked me.  
  
Shaking my head I looked at my watch and saw it was already 1:30. " No, I've got to go to Arnold's house at 2:30 to work on our project..you know what the strangest thing was about yesterday? " I said.  
  
" What helga?"   
  
" Well you know how sometimes we'll talk about our disfunctional family problems?" I asked.  
  
" yes?"   
  
" well, we talked about big bob, he seemed, really concerned, and wasn't mad at me or anything for snapping at him earlier on in the day..I think maybe I'd caught him in a bad mood.." I trailed off but shook my head.. " anyways, I'd better get back home, Olga's finally out of the house till 7:30 tonight, so I'm going to go home and enjoy a little bit of silence.."   
  
She nodded. " Ok helga, call me later ok?"   
  
" Gotcha phoebes.." and we seperated, i ran all the way home.  
  
It was in deed going to be a great day, i was gunna be able to see my beloved, spend time with him...oh I was once again back on my own personal cloud nine..  
  
" This time, I'm NOT going to be mean or tease him.." I promised.  
  
And once home I ran upstairs, got my stuff together and then got a sandwich for lunch.  
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After watching a little bit of Wrestling on T.V. I got up, grabbed my back pack and made my way to Sunset Arms, once there I knocked on the door and grandpa answered the door..   
  
" Hello?--oh...Hello helga.." he looked out the door.   
  
I sighed.. " Big Bob is in Miami for the week grandpa..I walked here ok?" I said slowly.  
  
He nodded. " oh, well then, come on in, arnolds up stairs."   
  
" Thanks.." and I ran up stairs and heard a crash from one room and figured it was Mr. and Mrs. Kokashka fighting..   
  
I heard music from another room and walked up the stairs and knocked on the door.. ' finally I'll be going into his room, the correct way..' i thought to myself smiling..  
  
He opened the door and then smiled a little. " Oh, hey helga, on time I see.."   
  
I rolled my eyes. " What's your point Football head, think I was gunna stand you up.." I shot out then closed my eyes remembering I was gunna cool off on the put downs and sighed. " Sorry Arnold.." and he shrugged and let me in.  
  
I looked around and sighed happily to myself, but then mentally smacked myself and turned around. " So Arnold, what exactally are we going to do for our project?" I asked.  
  
" Well I know something.." he started..  
  
" No bio rooms or whatever!" I said.  
  
He looked at me. " No, infact I was about to say, I know something we can count off the list, Biosquare's.." he said a note of annoyance in his voice.  
  
I laughed nervously. " oh..eh, hehe, I knew that, so fine what's the big idea this time?"   
  
" well, I was thinking we could do experments with plants, you know, what plants respond to what treatment, like which plants live off of just water or just sun..that sort of stuff.." he began.  
  
I remember watching Olga do that when I was 5 for one of her projects in school..it wasn't all that bad. So nodding approvingly i said.   
" Sounds good to me..where would we do these experiments?"   
  
" On the roof, there's adequate shading, and anything else we may need. " he added.  
  
" Oh..well I guess if we need help we could ask olga." I put in then smacked my hands over my mouth.. ' did I JUST say we could get help from OLGA?' I asked myself in slight horror  
  
He smiled. " Hey yeah! that would be great, how long is she going to be in town?"   
  
I thought back to our conversation earlier today.. " I think she said something like a month, she's doing an apprenticeship up at the hospital." I said thoughtfully.  
  
" That's pretty cool." he said.  
  
" Yeah I guess.." I fell silent, then not wanting to bring up a sore spot I asked. " Um...arnold can I ask you a question?"  
  
He looked up. " Sure, I guess.."  
  
" What was buggin ya yesterday? was it just the fact that you were partnered up with me?" I asked a self defensive tone slipping into my voice.  
  
" Why would you say that?"   
  
" Well gee, when Mr. Simmons said. ' Arnold, your with Helga..' the whining. ' NO!' kind of tipped me off.." I said smirking.  
  
He laughed a little. " oh that..well, that was..no I don't know, it wasn't your fault I was in such a bad mood, it was something else." he paused..  
  
I noticed the pause and instantly felt like an idiot for even bringing it up.   
" Look, arnold, you don't have to say anything if you don't want to.." my voice coming off a whole lot kinder than I wanted..  
***********************************************************************  
Arnolds POV  
  
I looked up to meet her gaze.. " Well, it's just that--yesterday was my mom's birthday and all.." I already felt a knot form in my stomache.  
  
I heard a very small gasp from her and an uneasy silence fell between us.   
  
She averted her gaze and looked up to the window, and then went over.   
" Um...I guess we should--ah, go start our project.." she said, her voice soft.  
  
" Yeah..here let me get the window, it's very hard to open.." and I lifted the window and climbed up her following behind.  
  
Before we started gathering our supplies helga said. " Hey arnold?"   
  
" Yeah?"   
  
" I'm sorry about your mom and all, I bet if she were here now you would still be celebrating her birthday.." she said.  
  
I looked up at her. " Thanks helga, that--really means alot to me." I said smiling.  
  
Suddenly, there was a shift in the air and I could tell her defensive wall was up.  
" Yeah well, don't get all soft on me Football Head." she snapped.  
  
I shook my head..and then shrugged. " whatever you say helga.."   
***********************************************************************  
Helga's POV   
  
It had become automatic..everytime we got close, I snapped and my defenses came up. ' So that was what was bothering him...and I had to snap at him, darnit! such a fool I am!' I chided myself mentally..  
  
I took a deep breath and let my shoulders relax. " Look arnold, I'm sorry I snapped at you..I shouldn't have done that.." I said.  
  
When he didn't say anything I was afraid he was angry at me again..  
  
" It's alright, I understand.." was all he said, and we got to work that uneasy silence that had befallen us before, had once again graced us with it's seering presence..  
  
We got the plants set up, and then assigned certain jobs. Since this was a month long project, he also told me that if for any reason he was gone, It would be alright if I were to come up to the roof and check the plants.   
  
He actually trusted me.. there's a surprise..  
  
At around 6:00, the silence had broken and we were talking again, not so much like we had before..but we talked about the day's events, the baseball game, anything that might have happened, I complained about being made to bond with Olga..   
  
And he complained about the way the boarders were whining about certain aspects of life...  
  
We also noticed the sun starting to set over the horizon.. " wow, this is a really good view arnold.." I commented and smiled.  
  
" Yeah it is..very good for star gazing, not good enough to see Sally's comet though. "   
  
I laughed at that remark and then sighed. " Well, I guess I'd better get home, Olga'll be home around 7:30.."   
  
I turned and started back for his room..   
  
" hey, helga?" he called after me.  
  
" Yeah?" I paused.  
  
" Could I walk you home? It's a pretty long walk." he said.  
  
My heart fluttered slightly, he wanted to walk me home..was he just joking?  
  
" You mean it?" I asked somewhat suspiciously..  
  
" Definatly.." he flashed that smile that I always loved to see and I couldn't help but smile as well..  
  
" Ok, come on football head..."   
  
And we raced down the stairs..  
  
" Grandpa! I'm gunna walk helga home ok? I'll be back later!" called arnold..  
  
" Ok, shortman, don't get lost!" he called back..  
  
We both rolled our eyes. " Don't worry we won't."   
  
Grandpa waved us off and then smirked. " Pookie, you think he's catching on?"   
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Once we started walking, I relaxed and we got to talking.. " hey, arnold..I know your sad about your parents and all, but could you tell me about them? If it's not too hard?" I asked, I knew a little about his family. But he never really talked about it..with anybody..  
  
He looked at me. " If you're sure you want to hear about them.."  
  
I grinned. " anything's better than Big Bob and Mirium.." I grumbled, but smiled.  
  
He laughed and went on to tell me they were explorers, how they met, their last day together, everything..That pretty much took up our whole walk..  
  
I also came to find out what exactally he saw in Ruth.. Apparently she looked like his mom..  
  
I never really expected him to open up like that, I mean, I'm not exactally the first person anybody would want to talk to about that kind of stuff...  
  
" You know arnold.." I said as we stopped and grabbed an ice cream cone from one of the stands on the sidewalk.   
  
" Your family's really interesting, having explorers for parents, it's so awsome.." I said.. " Beats, my fun filled family life.."   
  
He shrugged. " Yeah but, then there's my.. 'extended family.' "   
  
I giggled softly. " Even they're pretty cool. A little wierd but hey...look at the company they keep." I said teasingly..  
  
He made a face and then smiled. " Funny helga.."   
  
" Yeah I know.." I replied, and by about 7:15 we were home, and you could still see the remenence of a beatiful sunset.   
  
I saw olga's car in the drive way and groaned.   
  
" Don't worry helga, it's not that bad, atleast she's paying attention to you right?" he said reassuringly..  
  
I shrugged. " yeah I guess so..not so bad, but if she tries to get me to put on frilly clothes, I'm gunna scream bloody murder.."   
  
He grinned and I opened the door.. " Thanks for walking me home Arnold.." I said softly, a small blush creeping up on me..  
  
" No problem, and helga?" he said putting a hand on the one I had on the door.  
" Thanks for taking the time to listen to me..it's good to know that, even if you're mean sometimes..you still care.." he said and I got instantly flustered..  
  
" Yeah well, just don't get used to it arnoldo.." he grinned because somehow, even if i meant it mean, it came out good hearted, was I starting to actually relax around him?  
  
" Goodnight helga.." and he started back for his place..  
  
" Goodnight arnold.." and I shut the door, as I walked into the living room I saw Olga smiling at me smally.. and suddenly the blush deepened, and I silently complained..  
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How was that..  
  
Next chapter: " Growing Closer.."   
  
Comments, Flames..anything??   



	3. Growing Closer

And if I said I love you?  
  
Chapter 3: " Growing Closer "  
  
By: Kathy M. Kidman  
  
Disclaimer: .....I think you all know the drill  
  
AN: Well, I must say going on and finding out that I had 15 reviews on just my 1st day ** and a half **, well it made me a little happy? surprised? Inspired!  
I wrote the next chapter in one day, but you guys know that, and hopefully chapter 3 will be out just as quick. (( though today's the first day of the sun being out, so it may be a little slow coming )) I don't know, Maybe I'll even slip in another poem if the inspiration strikes. But I digress, this chapter will lead to the development and growth of about 3 different relationships. Let's just hope this turns out.   
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I sat in bed at 11:45 looking out my window, and then back at my poem book in my hands..I had gotten upstairs about an hour or so ago and couldn't quite sleep, my mind kept drifting to the past days events.   
Everything that had happened.  
And I really hate to admit it, but I guess it wasn't so bad watching movies with olga...like arnold said, at least she pays attention to me, even if means putting up with her sugary sweet voice, and perfect ways. Who'da thought Cassablanca would have been such a good movie. ( though if you ask me I think the ending was a little sappy )  
  
As night faded into early morning..or by about 1:30 I finally let my mind stop working and fell into a quick and dreamful sleep, though to my dismay I can't remember a thing about the dreams..  
  
And the most annoying part of my next morning? I, by my own choice, was up at 7:30!  
  
It even caught Olga off guard, who had just started breakfast for the morning, when I walked down the stairs and into the kitchen, my hair down and a slight mess.  
  
" Helga?? you're up already? and I was gunna let you sleep in till 8 today.." she said surprised but giggled.   
  
" Yeah well, I wasn't tired anymore I guess.." I noticed she made eggs benadict.  
  
" Eggs benadict huh olga? I don't suppose you could ever just make french toast huh?" I said, but it was teasingly.  
  
She smiles at me and then nods. " I could do that, but what fun would it be..I enjoy pampering my family! " she exclaimed giggling..  
  
I roll my eyes but smile anyways.. " Good Point.." then after taking a bite of my breakfast I look up. " Umm...olga, ah, that is, me and football hea---arnold are doing a science fair project together, it's about plants and stuff, like that one when you were in..umm..whatever grade it was.. " I muttered then looked up.. " but anways..I was kinda wondering, if you could help us...of course it's not gunna be as complicated as yours..but you get the point!..and don't even say ANYTHING about arnold.." I muttered evily.  
  
At this olga only giggled and I growled slightly.. " What's so funny.."  
  
She smiled and then replied. " It's just so cute the way you get all flustered when you even mention that little boy.."  
  
My jaw dropped and suddenly I found myself nervous.. could she know? " I..I..I do NOT get all flustered! I don't know what your talking about! " suddenly my eyes went nuetral and my shoulders slumped in mild defeat. Man she's too good..  
  
Olga only smiled. " Let me ask this, do you like him?" she asked..  
  
I felt my heart skip a beat and I grinned nervously.. " wa--wa--why would you say that?" couldn't I just lie? no, she'd know I was lying..hmm.. so of course, what do I say? " and what if I said yes?"  
  
She clapped her hands together then sobered.. " Then I would..oh I don't know forget you said anything..unless you felt like talking about it."  
  
Did she just say what I think? My eyes widened then went nuetral once more...was my sister--uh oh.." You'd do that for me?" my voice was soft and surprised.  
  
Simply nodding silently she smiled. " Of course baby sister..I wouldn't tell a soul."   
  
I couldn't believe this, I just, couldn't believe this..I stood up. " Hey olga?"  
  
" Yes baby sis?" she asked as she wtched me get up.  
  
My eyes lost their scowl and softened a little. " thanks.." and before she got a chance to reply I was out of the room and upstairs.  
  
" That girl.." was all she said and finished her breakfast.  
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Once saftely in my room I looked around.   
" well gee, just tell the world, there's a 3rd person to know your secret, is it THAT obvious that I like him?" I muttered then listened to see if she had followed me. and then confirmed to the negative and softly slipped into my closet.  
  
Noving the clothes over to the side I sat down infront of my shrine.  
  
" Oh my beloved arnold, the angel of love, the object of my deepest desires..the sole being I live to adore and swoon over. Yet the one I torment the most! oh why arnold, can't you see my fellings for you?!? and I, why can't not just give up this hard, bully exterior and let you see me for who I really am?!?!" I stopped.." Wow, that's good.." and started to scribble down the words before I forgot anything..  
  
And before I started up again, the phone rang..  
  
Suddenly Olga's voice protruded my thoughts.  
  
" Helga..baby sister! the phones for you! " she called from the phone in the hallway.  
  
I groaned and went to the stairs.. " Who IS IT?" I called down rudely.  
  
" It's.." I heard her ask for a name.. " arnold!"   
  
I had been leaning down the staircase a little with no more than my one hand keeping me up, and what she said made me lose concentration, and unfortunatly..my grip on the rail..   
  
" Whoa!!!" * Boom Bang Bang Bang * and I fell down the stairs, then lept at the phone.  
  
She looked at me with pure amazement, but I shrugged it off, with a look that said we'd talk later.. she nodded and left.  
  
" Arnold?!" My voice came out sounding a little..I don't know, hopeful surprise..and it was betraying me.. " I mean, what do you want football head."  
  
There was a slight pause.. " I heard crashing..what happened? are you alright?" he asked.   
  
He was concerned, on, there goes my knees. I noted as they went weak.  
" Yeah, I'm fine..heh heh, no biggie, didn't feel a thing.." I said nervously.  
  
He paused. " well, the gamgs going to slaucens for ice cream, then we're gunna play baseball at Gerald Field. do you wanna come?" he asked and waited for me to yell at him to get real or something..  
  
I could feel faintness creeping up on me, usually it was phoebe who called..and this time, ARNOLD had called, he asked me if I wanted to get ice cream..well granted the others would be there, but still..I tried to find my power of speech.  
  
Taking the pause as uncertainty he added quickly. " Phoebe'll be there."  
  
There! I found it! play on it Helga ol' girl before it's too late! " Sure, fine I'll come! when?"   
  
" About...an hour from now..sound good?" he finished.  
  
Ok..losing touch with reality here..  
" Better make a snappy exit.. " ok, I'll be there.."  
  
" Great! by helga." and he hung up.  
  
I knew olga had been around and watching, but couldn't care less..Arnold took the time to ask me to go out with the group..  
And there I went, my eyes rolled back and I passed out with that stupid grin I so often get. * Thud * ( phone crashes to the ground and rings slightly )  
***********************************************************************************************  
Arnolds POV  
  
What had I just done? I knew Gerald would thing me insane if he knew i invited Helga G. Pataki out with us.. But why not? I mean, she wasn't so bad once you got her to open up.. infact she was pretty nice to be around..  
  
Wait a minute?! What did I just say..err..think? whatever.. Oh well, I pushed the thought out if my mind..  
  
She seemed a little, I don't know, preoccupied. Maybe I woke her up or something. I mean it was sunday and only..what 9:45 in the morning.  
  
Oh well...I ran down the from the hallway phone, which, I was forced to use considering oskar broke MINE and Susie, in his place promised to get me a knew one today..   
  
I passed grandma who was cleaning, well and dancing with her mop, that's grandma for ya.  
  
Grandpa was in the living room watching television. " Morning grandpa.."  
  
" Morning short man. " he replied.  
  
Walking past him into the kitchen I grabbed a bowl of cereal.  
  
He peered in. " who'd ya call up?"  
  
I looked up briefly then back down. " Helga Pataki."   
  
I missed the small smile he made. " oh? is that the girl with the pink bow and one eyebrow that's always picken on ya?" he asked.  
  
I nodded. " Yeah.."  
  
He cackled in his insane way and then started to say something when grandma went by or, danced by singing, rather loudly at that.. " And it ain't no lie baby bye bye bye!! " she spin with the mop and out of sight a loud.. " BYE BYE " echoing down the halls..  
  
Grandpa rolled his eyes and went out to the halls after her shouting. " Pookie!! nobody wants to hear you sing!!" and he trailed off..  
  
I continued to eat silently when Mr. Hyun and Kakoshka came in bickering..  
  
" You cheated Oskar.." Accused Mr Hyun ( is that the right spelling? )   
  
" I did not you don't what your taking about, the checkers were not moved or anything!" shot back oskar.  
  
Stopping only to grab a banana they took their argument into the other room..  
  
I rolled my eyes, but smiled, though they got annoying, quite often, this was pretty good, I mean, my extended family couldn't be any worse than Helga's dysfunctional one..I've seen it first hand quite a few times..  
  
I then found myself thinking back to the first day of preschool..  
  
~*~ Flash Back ~*~  
  
It was about 7:45 in the morning, and grandpa had just dropped me off at the Johansens, and me and my new bestest friend in the world Gerald then proceeded to get walked to school by his older brother Jami O.  
  
Once there Gerald ran in but I saw a little girl, about my age, walking down the sidewalk..in the rain no less.. thankfully i had kept my umbrella, I started towards her when a car rushed by and splashed her, causing her to fall over.   
  
The poor girl looked as if she were gunna cry.  
  
So I ran over to her just as she started to sniffle, and put my umbrella over her to sheild her from the rain. she paused for a moment then looked up.  
  
I smiled and said. " I like your bow.." and with that she smiled.   
  
" You do?" she asked as I helped her up.  
  
" Yeah.." and she picked up her lunch box and said. " thanks..I'm Helga.."   
  
" I'm arnold.." and we both walked to class together.  
  
~*~ End Flashback ~*~  
  
After that I don't remember much..maybe helga would---shaking my head I looked at the clock on the wall. " 10:05, I must of been lost in thought. So i finished my cereal quickly and ran up stairs..  
  
Only to hear grandma shout. " Who let the dogs out. " Then bark like in the song.. I groaned and Grandpa shouted from the " office " pookie! stop that confounded singing!!"   
  
((AN: I know that would mean it was more about 2000, but I don't care.. I hope that's ok ))  
  
I rolled my eyes and went to my room. I had a game to get ready for.  
  
***********************************************************************************************  
Helgas POV  
  
My eyes fluttered open about 20 minutes after the phone call with Arnold.  
  
I woke up to Olga sitting next to me on the couch a very worried expression on her face.  
  
" Whoa.." I muttered sitting up.  
  
" What happened baby sis?? why did you faint like that?" she was radiating concern.  
  
I still had a goofy grin though.. " He actually took the time to call me and ask if I wanted to go for ice cream and stuff.."   
  
She grinned.. " I never knew you'd get a reaction like that."  
  
I smirked. " Well, usually the guys don't like me to come..what with my reputation and all, and it's usually Phoebe who comes to get me..but you know..I don't know what happened, but I'm glad it did..even if my head hurts now.." I laughed a little.  
  
" Well I'm glad your ok..I got worried when i watched you pass out. " she thought for a second.. " Oh, my friend Vicki is coming over from colledge. She's in town for the month too..so I'm going to be going with her to the movies..umm if that's ok with you helga."  
  
I shrugged. " No biggie, I'll probably be out most of the day with the others.."  
  
She sighed. " Oh, well just remember to be home before 9:00 ok?"   
  
" 9:00?? you're letting me stay out that late? cool! I could go see wrestlemania!" I stopped. " well I'd have to get tickets first, but still.." I grinned and did something that surprised the both of us..   
I sat up and gave her a hug, not a quick forced hug, but, a loving hug..  
  
She sat there for a second shocked, but then returned the hug..then I slipped from the hug and stood up. " Hey olga...Umm.." I started, not like I could actually ask her..   
  
" yes?" she asked..  
  
I shook my head and replied. " umm..thanks for ya know, letting me go out and then stay out till that late, bob or mirium really couldnt'a cared less.." I sighed, well it wasn't what I was GUNNA say, but it would work for now..  
  
She grinned. " No problem little sis.." and I backed out of the room, and ran up stairs to got ready, I was thinking about starting off now, but then another thought hit me.  
  
I ran downstairs to see Olga dusting.. " hey olga? could I ask you a favor?"   
  
She stopped and looked at me. "Anything little sis.." her voice bubbled with happiness..probably at the chance to bond with me..   
  
" At about 10:50 could you maybe, I don't know, give me a ride to Slaucens?" I asked.  
  
She thought for a second then grinned. " of course helga! I'd love to!"   
  
I sighed with relief, well that was over, now all I had to do was keep busy till it was time to go..   
  
Doi! what else was I spose to do! i ran up to my room, shut the door and went into the closet, and continued my previous thoughts till about 10:49..  
  
" Helga?" came Olga knocking on the door..   
  
" what?" * bang * I tripped over my baseball bat and went sprawling on the floor next to my bed, which caused Olga to come into the room..  
  
" what happened? are you ok?"   
  
I shook my head to clear the stars I was seeing and nodded. " yes, olga, I'm fine..now whattid you want?"  
  
She got a surprised glance..and then shrugged it off. " oh, well you wanted me to give you a ride to Slaucens..and well, it's about that time.."   
  
My eyes widened. " Ok ok! well then let's go! I don't want to be late!" and I grabbed my stuff and got into the car..  
***********************************************************************************************  
Arnolds POV  
  
As we.. ( being me, Gerald, Phoebe, and Sid ) waited for the rest of the group to gather, we were chatting, we saw Curly coming up and got strange looks..and then Eugene, Rhonda and Nadine came up.. Park, and a few others came a little later   
  
And everybody got a surprise when we saw, not only who the last person was, but who with her..   
  
" Helga's coming?? who invited her?"   
  
Phoebe exchanged glances with me and a knowing smile and then spoke up. " I did..is that alright? "   
  
Gerald sighed. " yeah it's ok.."  
  
" Hey! since when is Olga back in town? " was Rhonda's first question.  
  
" Don't know, maybe she'll stay for a while.." came Nadine.  
  
" Olga is so cool, and her car is so awsome too!, ugh Helga is so lucky to have her for an older sister.." exclaimed Rhonda  
  
" Yeah, lucky.." I finished and watched as Helga got out of the car, she wasn't exactally grinning, but then again she wasn't scowling..I guess that was a good sign.  
  
Sheena and a nadine and Rhona all ran over to the car and they asked if she wanted to stay for ice cream..  
  
" Oh, i'm just so sorry girls, I would but my best friend from college is coming to town, we're going out for the day..maybe I'll visit with you later ok??" her voice was giggly again..  
  
I noticed Helga roll her eyes.  
  
" Well come on guys, let's go get our ice cream." I heard sid say and everybody started to file inside..  
  
Helga walked over to the car and had a very soft conversation with Olga, me and Phoebe waited for her.  
  
" Now remember Helga, no later than 9:00..ok?" I heard Olga say..  
  
" Ok Ok..geesh, I know..umm..hey olga, could I borrow some money incase I do get a chance to go see Wrestlemania?"   
  
There was a pause then helga grinned and thanked her. " Yeah I'll see you later Olga..No! don't worry I'm not gunna get into any trouble....yeah sure I'll go with you shopping tomorrow after school.." I heard..then a slight pause.. and her eyes widened. " OLGA!!!"  
  
And her sister drove off giggling.  
  
She stomped towards the door, and I asked. " what's wrong helga?"  
  
She glared at me. " nothings wrong football head!, now come on, let's go get icecream. " and she went inside.  
  
I sighed and followed muttering. " whatever you say helga.." and phoebe just smiled.  
~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~  
About 20 ta 30 minutes later everybody left slaucens and headed for gerald field  
  
Teaming up we started the game..and about 3 innings in...  
  
Eugene was up to bat. " Oh boy! this time I'm gunna hit a homerun and our team will win!!"   
  
Everybody rolled their eyes and just got ready to use the first aid kit if the time came.  
  
Harold pitched the ball and Eugene tried to hit, but missed.  
  
" Strike one!"  
  
Pitch swing, miss..  
  
" Strike two!"  
  
Harold pitched again, and this time, as if in slow motion eugene swung the bat and connected with the ball and with good strength sent the ball flying...and it made it's way to one side, and slammed into one way, the a sign..and, as time lapsed to normal...  
  
* WAM * * THUD * " oww get off my eugene!" " I'm ok..."  
  
As you can imagine, the ball hit eugene in the head and he fell into helga who started throwing a fit.  
  
She shoved him off her and traded places with Sheena taking outfield and muttering evily to herself.  
  
I was up next.   
  
" Ohh...looook! it's ARRRNNOOLDDD everybody move in! " called harold and got a few snickers.  
  
" Just pitch harold." I groaned..  
  
" are you suuure you wanna hit the ball arnoold?? you don't wanna let Gerald take your place??" he taunted,.  
  
" Pitch the freaken ball pink boy before I come over there and shove it down your throat!" growled Hengal, gaining a few cheers and snickers, and even more surprised and fearful glances..  
  
I looked over at her, and harold glared angrily at her.  
  
" Ok ok madam fortress mommy.." grumbled harold and turned to me..  
  
I got read and he pitched it and I missed..  
  
" Strike one!"  
  
The next pitch connected..  
  
Unfortunatly, as luck, and the fact it seemed to happen often, would have it, it smacked helga in the side of the head. * bang *  
***********************************************************************************************  
Helga's POV  
  
All I remember is turning around and going back to my spot in the outfield, after threatening Harold, then * wam * I was knocked out..  
  
" oh dear!" cried phoebe running from her spot at the bench..  
  
" uh oh.." muttered gerald.. " she's gunna be furious arnold.."   
  
Eugene ran towards the cooler. " I'll get some ice!" * Crash, splash * ......" I'm ok.."  
  
Arnold on the other hand ran over to the small group. " Helga? is she alright?"  
  
My eyes fluttered open and instead of a furious one, it was a dazed look..I looked straight at Arnold.   
  
He gulped and waited for me to start yelling..  
  
Eugene had successfully gotten the cooler of icewater up. But just behind teh group he tripped. " Uhh..whoaa!!!!" and the half empty cooler went flying and the whole group got splashed resulting in an outburst of..   
  
" COLD!!" " Ah! My new outfit!" and " Yikes!!"  
  
I sat up yelping. " Colllldddd!!!" then a headache hit me..   
  
3 of the boys, and rhonda leading the way, anger blaring in her eyes, were chasing Eugene around the field. " Get back here Eugene!! this was Real Silk!!"   
  
I looked back at Arnold and he looked surprised..and dazed..  
  
A thought flew into my head and I shook it, to clear the thought..  
  
Standing up I mentally slapped myself, I then turned to arnold who expected to get pounded..  
  
" Helga! your ok!!" was phoebe..  
  
" Yeah, got a whopping headache but..hey.." then I returned the hug she gave me and saw Arnold turn and walk away, apparently hoping he could get out of a beating..though I would never in my life physically afflict pain on my beloved..  
  
I started after him, shivering but smiling to myself. " Hey arnold!" I called out..  
  
He stopped and turned towards me.   
  
My heart fluttered, and like an ocean breeze the insult I was going to toss at him flew from my mind.  
  
" Does your bat have something against me or anything? " I asked, then realized how god awful that sounded..  
  
He grinned sheepishly.. " I don't think soo."  
  
" Well, seems you have good for my head..9 times outta 10 your smacking me in the side or back of it.." I finished..  
  
" I'm so sorry Helga.." he said..  
  
I was about to say something when we both heard Eugene scream then crash, taking sid, stinky, park, and Rhonda down with him...   
  
I shook my head. " Jus, try not to let it happen again.. I'm running out of headspace.." 86 my last remark, that headspace thing was TOTALLY lame..  
  
He sighed. " I'm thinking the game is over for now.."  
  
I looked around to find Curly running around the field chasing two butterflys and yelling. " DEATH TO ALL THAT FLYS!!!"   
  
" what a moron.." I muttered..  
  
" yeah, curly can be a little...strange sometimes.."   
  
Also Stinky and Sid had to physically restrain Rhonda from hurting Eugene, and they dragged her kicking and screaming to a bench, while Eugene coward behind a trash can..  
  
Nadine was now chasing Curly telling him to " leave my fluttering friends to their peace " and he would shout at her..  
  
Sheena was standing there looking around and shaking her head as well..  
  
I heard Gerald call for Arnold to come help keep Rhonda in place..and he took off..  
  
I sighed happily to myself and pulled out my locket, after of course making sure NOBODY was around..   
  
" Oh my dear beloved Angel..how you live to help others, and make the world a better place, how you've stolen my heart and every being..I wish i could be like you, taking everything in stride and not letting anything get to you..but no, I have to be cruel and harsh, and seemingly drawing your affections even further away.." I sighed..  
  
Then heard the familiar wheezing of Brainy behind me.. I turned around. " Brainy? why are you always following me..are you stalking me or something?"  
  
" uh.. * wheeze *...no.."   
  
I rolled my eyes.. " be happy i'm in a good mood right now.." and I walked off..  
  
He stared after me confused...and started to shake, looking from side to side he then proceeded to punch himself, braking his own glasses, and falling over.  
~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~  
  
It took 20 minutes to stop the insanity. And ofcourse Curly ended up running down towards the zoo, yelling. " FREE THE ANIMALS!! " and then laughing madly  
  
Everybody agree'd that the game was shot and decided maybe next time they'd NOT bring Curly along.   
  
After everything happened I ran up phoebe.." Hey phoebes..wanna come over to my house for a while?"  
  
She smiled softly but then sighed. " I must apologize Helga, but---umm, I've plans that were made previously before our encounter..is it something important? a problem perhaps?"   
  
I started to say yes, but then realized what her plans were and tossed away my problem for a later date. " No..nothings wrong, just wanted ta spend some time with my best friend, but hey, I think..um your plans are more important.." I said nudging her slightly and she only blushed..  
  
I laughed softly.." Have fun phoebes.."   
  
She grinned and me and ran off.   
  
Well, arnold had already left so I decided to go check and see if It were possible to get myself wrestlemania tickets..  
***********************************************************************************************  
Phoebe's POV  
  
I realized Helga knew about my plans, and that made me rather nervous..  
  
But me and Gerald had decided to go to a movie, as friends. Nothing more..  
  
" So, which movie are we going to go see Gerald?" I asked.  
  
He shrugged. " I don't know, " Free Fall " movie is out..  
  
" Free fall??" I asked perplexed  
  
" Yeah ya know... Free Fall I: Destiny of the twins and Free Fall II: Never say Never "   
  
I was still puzzled. " well, I suppose..though I must admit I have never seen those movies.."  
  
He grinned. " well, none of the movies ever have anything to do with eachother, just that all the main characters are family..so well, it's really funny, and I think you'll like it..but if you don't want to.." he trailed off..  
  
I shook my head. " No, I'd love to"   
  
" Great let's go, it starts in 3 minutes" and we raced to get snacks and seats, and when we got settled everything started..  
***********************************************************************************************  
Geralds POV  
  
As the Movie itself started I caught her out of the corner of my eye sigh..  
  
I knew she didn't like movies much, she was more content to just stay home reading a good book, so it really caught me off guard when she agree'd I was fully ready to go walk through the park.   
  
I heard her giggle slightly at the movie and realized I hadn't been paying attention to anything..that and the fact I had dropped my Juu Juu B's and didn't know it till I saw then scattered on the floor..  
  
I muttered softly. " Aww man..and those are my favorite candies.."   
  
She looked over. " Is anything the matter Gerald? "   
  
" Huh?? oh no..nothings wrong here.." I reassured and she gave me a strange look and then went back to the movie..  
  
I sighed and just settled for popcorn.   
  
After a while the movie got good, the best part about these movies is not only are they hilarious, but they are action pact..which is another reason I didn't know if Phoebe would like to see it..  
  
But she decided she did..so, well..  
  
Man, what's with this, I'm never so nervous around her, what's goin on..  
  
I caught my mind drifting back to the Restaurant mix up..I guess it was then that I realized I liked liked phoebe. I wasn't too sure, but I was pretty sure she liked, liked me too..but we weren't too sure. So now we're just seeing.  
  
A gasp fron both behind me and beside me caught me off guard and my popcorn spilled..  
  
Well this is great..  
  
Phoebe looked over and smiled a little. " Sorry Gerald.." and she saw me looking at my popcorn on the floor..   
  
" Oh dear..I'm terribly sorry Gerald here.." and she offered me some of hers..  
  
" You sure?" I asked..  
  
She nodded. " positive.." and the movie continued..  
  
After that it went reasonably uneventful, but by the time the movie was over, it was about 2:40. So we decided to go to the arcade for a while...  
  
I knew she was doing what I wanted to do, that made me happy cause I was totally content, but after about 10 dollars and 2 hours of game play later, I decided this time she would choose..  
  
" So, Phoebes..what do YOU want to do this time?" I asked as we stepped out of the arcade..  
  
She looked around.. " Oh, it doesn't really matter I--"  
  
" Yeah it does, come on what do ya wanna do huh?"   
  
She sighed. " well, really I'd be content walking through the park just taking in the sights and sounds..I've always enjoyed that. "  
  
I grinned. " Sounds good to me.."  
  
" Really??" she asked.  
  
" Definatly.." I assured and we started for the park..  
  
After a rather quiet walk through the park she spoke up..  
  
" um..I guess we'd better get home, maybe work on our project for a while?"   
  
I shrugged, hey atleast it was an excuse to be with her longer. " Sounds good to me."   
  
She giggled and we headed back to her home..  
***********************************************************************************************  
Helga's POV  
  
About the same time Phoebes and Hair bo--err...Gerald would be getting home.. ( about 5:50 ) I was heading towards wrestlemania.  
  
I wished that I would get a chance to see arnold, maybe ask him to go with me..then again, maybe he wouldn't like it so much.   
  
I turned the corner when who do I crash into? Arnold..  
  
We both fell over and I dropped my tickets. " Nice going Football head!" I berated.  
  
" Sorry Helga.." he muttered and we both leaned in to get the tickets, resulting in the both of us smacking heads.   
  
" oww.." " ow! hey!"   
  
I rubbed my head as we both got hold of one ticket.   
  
" WrestleMania huh?" he asked.  
  
" Yeah? so what's it to you?" I asked defensively.  
  
" Well, nothing, it's just that, me and gerald were gunna go see them, but he had plans. " said Arnold somewhat dejectedly.  
  
I sighed, this was my chance to spend time with him, to be nice to him! show him my tender side.  
  
Don't blow it helga.." Yeah well...if it'll get you to shut up, I got an extra ticket as you can see, if you want it, it's yours." I said avoiding his eyes at all costs.  
  
I looked up and met his gaze. Man, it is so easy to get lost in those eyes..  
  
" Helga?" I heard faintly..  
  
" Huh??" I said in a dazed voice..  
  
" I asked if you really meant it that I could have the extra ticket." he said giving me a worried glance..  
  
" Yeah sure whatever, Harolds cousin, has let me in a few times now, so it's not so bad. " I finished non-shalauntly..  
  
" Really?? cool..." I noticed the time..   
  
" Well, if we're gunna get there, we'd better start down, 10 minutes till starting. " I said nervously.  
  
" Yeah let's" and we took off running, and made it just in time.  
***********************************************************************************************  
Arnolds POV  
  
I must admit after me beaning helga, and well, I don't know, just her being helga, I was quite surprised when she offered me the extra ticket, why was she being so nice..  
  
Gerald might have said she was planning something, but I doubt it..  
  
She even sprung for some snacks at the concession stand..  
  
And when we got there, we had gotten VIP seats..so that's what she meant by, her cousin let her in at times..   
  
That's helga for you, one surprise after another. I shook my head as the fighting started..  
  
I heard her pick up the phone next to her seat..   
  
" Hey Olga?..Yeah it's Helga.." she paused. " well if you'd let me finish my sentence I could tell you." she said her voice edging with annoyance..  
" Yeah I'm at Wrestlemania.." the crowed errupted in cheers as one of the wrestlers.. ' Wrangler Dave.' Went down.  
  
" Yeah you heard me.." I saw a strange smile enter her face and she laughed slightly. " Not a word olga..just not a word..".. She made a face at the phone..  
  
" Yeah ok, everything should be done by..what.." she looked at her watch. " 7:15- 7:30??" she grumbled. " I don't know! nothing I bet."  
  
Boy one sided conversation's were very wierd..  
  
The crowed cheered again and I saw her say something quickly but couldn't hear it..  
  
( which was to be exact. " I'm hoping we'll go for a burger or something.." )  
  
" Ok olga..see you later..yeah, as long as she doesn't get MY room I don't care..yeah..YES...bye.."   
  
She turned to me.." man, can she talk.." and I smiled and then we turned back to watch.  
~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~  
As she had told her sister, it was about 7:20 when the show ended, as we walked home, we talked some more..a little but not much, just idle chatter, and she hadn't been mean to me for a while...  
  
We turned the corner and came upon sunset arms..  
  
" Hey..helga? you have dinner yet?" I asked, and knew I was crazy for doing this..  
  
She shook her head. " No..not really. Spent most of my time walking the streets had to dry off after Hurricane Eugene struck..." she muttered.  
  
" Oh?..well ah. I don't spose you'd wanna stay for dinner..well if you can consider grandma's cooking dinner.." I teased  
  
She giggled and then nodded. " I'll have to ask olga, but I'm sure it'll be ok." she agreed.  
  
" Great! I mean..well then come on in.." I said, and I opened the door, and forgot about the pets..and they zoomed out of the doorway knocking us both over.   
  
" Woops.." I laughed nervously.   
  
" What kind of a nut house you got there anyways football head?" she asked rubbing her head getting up.  
  
" Well..you know how grandma and grandpa are.." I sighed..  
  
" Yeah I do..." she added and I raised an eyebrow.  
  
She then called Olga.. " Hey olga? yeah.." she smiled to herself and then looked at me. and I decided to go tell Grandma we had an extra dinner guest..  
  
" Grandma! set another plate!"   
***********************************************************************************************  
Helga's POV  
  
After he left I turned back to the phone.. " Yeah Olga, it's me..you'll never guess what?" I said my voice sounding cheerful.  
  
" What baby sis?" her voice sounding extra cheerful.  
  
" Well..ah, you know how I said earlier I hoped I'd get to grab a burger or something with arnold?" I said dropping my voice so nobody else would hear.  
  
" Yeah?"   
  
" Well..even better, he INVITED me for dinner!" I had to contain myself from jumping for joy..  
  
I heard her squeel and rolled my eyes and now heard ringing in my left ear.  
  
" Yeah, ok..well could i stay?" I asked.  
  
" Of course little sis! this is so exciting!"   
  
I sighed. " Yeah i know..I thought he'd wanna get away from me as fast as he could..but to my surprise he actually wanted to spend time with me.."  
  
I heard her mutter something to somebody and figured it was her friend.   
  
" Tell her to stay away from my room. " I said defensively, as I had just remembered my poem books were out on my bed.. eek!  
  
" Don't worry little sis, your doors closed, she'll stay out..promise.."   
  
" Good.." I muttered then arnold walked in..  
  
" Helga, dinners about done, better get a seat and served before Mr. Kokoshka get's downstairs.." he said sighing in obvious annoyance..  
  
" Oh..ok arnold..well then, olga I'll talk to you later ok? yes I know 9:00, I know!..ok..OK! bye.."   
  
And with that I hung up and walked into the kitchen. " hello Gertie..Phil." I mentioned..  
  
I noticed arnold waited for him to say ' don't call me phil ' to tell the truth so did I..but he never did..  
  
" Why hello Joan, hard day fighting lions in the jungle? " she asked.  
  
I heard arnold sigh. " No grandma this is--"  
  
" No it's ok arnold.." i interrupted, that cooky bat was so insane, but still..really nice, they've seen me in here more times than i care to choose, they probably already knew I liked arnold.. though I wasn't too sure. If they did I just prayed they didn't tell arnold.  
  
Well, it was very..active after we'd been served, the boarders came in, and as usual the round of greetings..  
  
" So we're having another guest for supper, guess that means no seconds eh heh heh.." came Oskar Kokoshka.  
  
" Oskar! please be nice." chided Susie.  
  
" What do you mean..I'm being nice, I was just stating a fact--" and they fell into an argument.   
  
" Don't worry oskar..I don't eat much anyways.." was all i said..  
  
" can I have her seconds?" he asked laughing..  
  
" OSKAR!"   
  
Suddenly the other boards, well mr. hyunh, and the other boarder, i forgot his name, started in on an argument about something oskar had done that day, and then even Arnolds Grandpa started in and a distinct " Oskar you lying scum!" was heard..  
  
It was all I could do to contain my laughter.   
  
Arnold on the other hand had a very perturbed look on his face.. I could tell he was used to this.  
  
Gertie came over to me. " Why don't you two go eat in another room, get away from these loons.." she whispered smiling..  
  
I found myself blushing for some reason and she winked.  
  
" Hey, arnold..it's alittle noisy in here, your grandma says we can go eat in another room if you want to.." I started studdering.  
  
He looked up at his grandmother with a very strange glance, then Grandpa slammed his fist on the table and the bread rolls went flying.  
  
" Ok..that's it, come helga, let's go eat on the roof.." he said very well hid anger in his voice, but I knew that sound all to well, I had it all the time, so i could tell he was angry..  
  
" Ok.." and as we left i had to add. " just don't get cozy on me.."   
  
He rolled his eyes and I smiled a little. " Just pullin your leg football head.."   
  
Ok, that sounded sweet..my defenses are down..go freaken figure..oh well, atleast i'm relaxed..then again watching a bunch of loons fight, does tend to make one relax and laugh..  
  
We got up to the roof and sat down..and an uneasy silence fell between us..  
I've never been this close to him for this long before, what was i spose to say?   
  
Then again..I swore to myself that if I ever got my chance to be alone with him, I'd tell him my secret..though after 6 years of silence..I don't know if I could do it..  
  
So we ate in silence..for a while then I started to talk as I leaned against the door frame. " So, ah arnold...I take it that happens often..you know the fighting between your grandparents and the boarders?"  
  
He sighed. " Yeah, all TOO often, and if they aren't fighting they're just down right..wierd..but it's my family so I deal."   
  
I nodded. " Yeah, that's pretty cool, a little strange but cool.."   
  
Then I admited something I thought I never would. " You know arnold you were right about Olga.."   
  
He turned to me. " What do you mean?"  
  
I shrugged and then looked up at the night sky. " Well, ah, friday night we watched Cassablanca, though it was a little too sappy at the end for me it was pretty cool..and now she's letting me stay out till 9:00 tonight, while even if my parents didn't care, bob would blow a gasket if I came in past 8.." I rolled my eyes.  
  
He smiled. " That's nice..see I told you all you had to do was give your sister a chance..she's not that bad now is she?"   
  
I gritted my teeth. " Still has to be perfect in every way, and still has that sugary sweet voice..but yea I guess she's pretty cool.." I sighed.  
  
He chuckled. " Atleast you two are closer.." he then looked around at the plants. " So did you ask her about the project?"  
  
" Huh? oh yea I did, she agree'd whole heartedly to help." I said paying little attention to the subject.  
  
" Great! Maybe on tuesday after school you guys can come over." he asked.  
  
I about said yes then I remembered my visits with Dr. Bliss tuesdays and thursdays..  
  
" Ah..well I can't unless you won't mind us over about 5:15 - 5:30.." I said.  
  
" Why?"   
  
I wasn't about to tell him I'm seeing a shrink. " Cause I'm busy that day..how bout wednesday instead?"  
  
He shrugged.. " ok..sounds good." then I looked at my watch. " 8:15? man, time sure flies doesn't it."   
  
" Yeah it does.." he said softly.  
  
" Look, Arnold, thanks for inviting me over and all, but ah, I guess we'd better get down.." I said getting totally off track..  
  
He looked at me confusedly.. " oh..ok..well if your worried about being late, at 8:45 grandpa could take ya home.."   
  
I smiled. " Hey, I never thought of that." I said.  
  
" Well, either way let's get downstairs get the plates to the kitchen." He added.  
  
" Alright.." and we went downstairs and into the kitchen, thankfully everybody had settled down and only his grandparents were left.  
  
" Ah..dinner was great and all." I said.  
  
" Glad ya liked it Mayla, you and Kimba have a good chat?" she asked.  
  
I got all nervous and nodded.. " yeah--ahh great time.."  
  
" Hey grandpa, in a while could you take Helga home? curfew at 9 and all.."   
asked Arnold..  
  
" Of course I can.." he paused. " Just let me go find my keys." and he sauntered off into the hallways..  
  
" Why don't you two help me do dishes? the commander and troupe left a real mess.." came his grandmother..  
  
" Ok.." we both agreed at once and then started off for work, it was about time to go when phil came back in.. " I found em! strangely enough they were in my back pocket.."  
  
Arnold rolled his eyes and i giggled.   
  
" Well then Arnolds little friend what's say we get you home, you wanna come arnold?"   
  
" You know very well Kimba is going along to take his little friend home Phil.." came Gertie..  
  
" Don't call me phil!..now come on kids.."   
  
and we got into the car and drove off..  
***********************************************************************************************  
Phoebe's POV  
  
At the same time they were leaving to take Helga home, Gerald and I finished the work on our project and were now standing outside of the house..   
  
" Thank you gerald for taking me to see the movie.." I said shyly..  
  
He grinned.. " well, thanks for putting up with the arcade and everything, and ah, well..ya know.."   
  
I smiled reassuringly. " It's ok.. gerald really it is..I enjoyed myself today..really i did.." I blushed..  
  
" Really??" he asked amazed.  
  
" Yes..really.." and i took a step forward and quickly kissed him on the lips.." I stepped back blushing furiously and put my hand on the door, I was so embarresed, he'd probably hate me now!  
  
" Oh my dear..Gerald I'm so sorry I shouldn't have done that..please don't hate me.." I rushed out..  
  
He had a look of pure shock in his eyes.." I--you..it's ok..really It is phoebe.I'm not mad.." he assured calmy, but a goofy grin played apon his face.  
  
I stopped and sighed with relief.. " Your not mad??"  
  
" Nope.."   
  
" I'm so relieved..I mean..I--I--" I trailed off, if I had this much trouble admitting I--liked him liked him, imagine what helga would go through..   
  
" You what?"   
  
" I like you..like you.." I whispered out..  
  
His eyes widened.." Really??"   
  
I nodded keeping my eyes down.  
  
" I'm glad.." he said..  
  
I looked up quickly. " Why?"   
  
" Cause..I like you, like you.." he said..  
  
I felt faint, happy but faint..I blushed shyly then smiled. " Well..ah, I'd better get inside..umm..see you in school tomorrow?" I said..  
  
He grinned.. " Definatly.." and kissing my once on the cheek he jumped down the stairs and across the street and ran home.  
  
And I ran inside my house and up stairs..and then got into my room and cheered happily, then stopped and sat down on my bed to call helga, see how her day went..  
  
Picking up the phone it started to ring..  
***********************************************************************************************  
Arnolds POV  
  
The ride home was silent, not nervous silent, not defensive silent just silent, till grandpa turned on the radio and started humming to an old song..   
  
I noticed helga smiling, almost peacefully and wondered what was up.  
  
Well after that we got to her house we both got out..  
  
" Thanks for--ya know having me over and stuff.." she muttered.  
  
" No problem..you know, it was nice to have you over." I grinned when she looked up startled. " once you start to be nice."   
  
She sighed. " Yeah well..don't get too cozy football head." but it wasn't as rude sounding as she wanted it to be, infact she was smiling.  
  
I laughed and she did too.. " well, I'd better get inside, Olga's probably wondering whats up."   
  
" Yeah..well I'd better get home..see you in school?" I said..  
  
" Yeah, see ya.." and we separated..  
***********************************************************************************************  
Helga's POV  
  
Once inside I walked into Olga saying. " No phoebe she's not..oh wait. here she is.."   
  
She handed me the phone a very strange smile on her face..apparently I was still blushing..  
  
I took the phone and said. " Hold on phoebes.." and I looked to Olga..  
  
" Hang up when I tell you too okay?" I paused. " and don't worry I'll tell you about it later.."  
  
She nodded and I fled up stairs..once on my phone I said. " Olga..hang up.." and she did..  
  
" What's up phoebes.." my voice perkier than usual..  
  
" My Helga, you seem particularly happy" she pointed out..  
  
" Yeah well.." I trailed off.. " ahem..so how was your day huh??"   
  
I heard her cough nervously. " It was very nice helga...Gerald and I went to see umm Free Fall III: revenge of Tibons Hog. It was rather entralling once it got to the action part."  
  
I grinned.. " So, you and Hair bo--eh, I mean Gerald went to the movies eh?? eh??"   
  
" Yes helga, then we went to the arcade..it was rather..intriguing, then we took a very romantic walk in the park and then we came here and worked on our project."  
  
I grinned.. " ah..so, what's the scoop?" I'd known ever sense the restaurant that her and him were more than friends, now if it were official, I'd have to learn to be nice to him..but if it made phoebe happy, i'd try.  
  
" Well.." she whispered.. " He likes me likes me.."   
  
I whooped and fell backwards off my bed. " That's great Phoebes I'm so happy for ya!"   
  
She giggled and I could tell she was blushing.. " just please keep it between us..ok? helga."  
  
" No problem phoebes.."   
  
" Domo Arigato helga.."  
  
Japanese..heh. " welcome phoebes.."  
  
" Now helga..about your day..did you get to go see Wrestlemania." she inquired..  
  
I felt a blush run slowly up my cheeks, and I smiled. " Yea.."   
  
" What happened?"   
  
I sighed. " Well..let's just say my dream came true phoebes.." I said softly.  
  
" You mean.."  
  
" NO!! not that one, he doesnt' know!..I was too chicken to do it while we were eating dinner.." I blurted out.  
  
" You had dinner together?" she asked..  
  
Well secrets out..  
  
" Yeah, we had dinner, would have eaten in the kitchen but arnold got angry at everyone for arguing and we went up to his roof and ate..I had the perfect chance..but blew it!" I smacked my forehead.  
  
" It's quite alright helga.." she reassured me..  
  
" Yeah I know..I mean, he's told lila that he likes me..so I'm halfway right phoebes??"  
  
She giggled. " Quite right helga.." then heard a knock at the door..  
  
" Oh, helga I've got to go, I'll see you in school tomorrow..Ja Ne.."  
  
" Ja ne phoebes.." and we hung up, and as promised I ran downstairs..  
  
" HEY Olga! You'll never guess what?!" I said excitedly..  
  
" What? "  
  
I saw her friend there but really could have cared less..and so for quite some time we chatted, I went on and on about the days events..and she squeeled and said how exciting it was..  
  
Till 10:00 we chatted..I guess sometimes..even with the people you thought you totally hated, or you had no chance with, it's alot easier to grow closer.  
()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()  
  
Coming soon: " It's hard to say I'm sorry."   
  
So how was it? sorry it took me so long!..hope you enjoy!   
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	4. " A time for change "

And what if I said I love you?  
  
Chapter 4: " A time for change."  
  
By: Kay girl!  
  
Disclaimer: * reads a clip board. * " This is preposterous! I do not own this show! who wrote this!! DHARMA!!! " * stomps off muttering * " I do not own Hey Arnold, never have never will.. "  
  
AN: Ok, first off, I am SOOO sorry for not getting this out sooner, right now * 4/21/01 our modem has somehow disappeared off the face of the earth and can't be connected * I can't seem to get on!...But of course..  
I have to thank a certain author.. * grins * Queen of Hearts, for getting me back onto my writing... (( although I'm not sure if she knows it..)) I read all of her poems and stories on her authors profile..man, there are alot!..and man are they good, after reading her last 2 poems, I suddenly felt inspired to write again.. So thanks!  
  
This chapters dedicated to Queen of Hearts ( that and the fact that Dying young is already awesome! keep it up! )  
  
Now, this time, what will happen when a certain blonde "bully" tries to change herself, and just how will this affect the people around her.. (( although I know I said that wrong..sorry bout that! * grins and sweat drops and starts to write*))  
~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~  
Helga's POV   
  
8:22 AM  
  
This can't be good. It really can't, why? Because I'm gunna be late for school, and even Olga isn't up yet!  
  
I rushed downstairs hurriedly getting ready even as I rushed into the living room to find her and Vicki passed out on the couch where I last left them at 11:30 the previous night.  
  
" Olga! Wake up quick! I'm going to be late for school!" Ok, so maybe I could have just run to school, but what was the point to that. I wanted to make it to class BEFORE lunch.  
  
She stirred and then yawned. " What? What time is it?" She asked groggily.  
  
I rolled my eyes and growled. " 8:23 now! I'm going to be late to school!" That woke her up, she was never late, or absent.  
  
" Come on baby sis!" She was still in her clothes from the previous day, but she grabbed me by the wrist and dragged me out of the house and into her car, and in record time, ( Six minutes, too bad she doesn't break the speed limit like dad does..)  
  
After handing me money for lunch she grinned. " Have a good day at school little sis."  
  
I groaned and hopped out of the car. " Thanks Olga, see you after school." and I ran into the school, and got into the class room, just as the bell rang.   
  
" Am I late?!" I gasped out as I fell into my seat, out of breath and ready to pass out.  
  
Mr. Simmons gave me a worried glance. " No, you're just in time."   
  
I sighed with relief. " Thank god."   
  
A couple of the other kids sent me strange glances, but I ignored them.  
  
" Well--ah class," said Mr. Simmons still eying me strangely for a second then going back to what he was saying before. " For creative writing I have a very special project for you. "  
  
Everybody groaned. " I would like you to write a poem about a friend, or what friendship means, or something along that line. It can be anybody you know--"   
  
" No Harold it cannot be the guy on the Mr. Fudgie bars " said Mr. Simmons and Harold groaned making a few of the kids snicker.  
  
" It has to be somebody realistic, like say your mom or dad, or a friend, or even a teacher," he said smiling slightly.   
  
' Oh brother.' I thought.  
  
" This will be due on Wednesday, and the best four will be picked to go to the monthly, ' Winding River Review, ' a sort of magazine portraying some of the works of PS 118 and 119's students. "  
  
I looked down and grabbed my pink backpack, pulling out my new blue note book, and a piece of paper I ripped a part of the paper off, and just like usual I tossed a spit ball right at Arnold's head.  
  
Chuckling to myself till he turned around I pretended to be writing in my diary. Of course he didn't know what it was. Then I felt his glare still on me and I looked up and whispered. " What?!"   
  
He rolled his eyes and turned back around.  
  
I sighed dreamily and then opened my book, sighing I started to write.  
" Oh, my beloved cornflower haired angel."   
***********************************************************************************************  
Arnolds POV  
  
I hated it when Helga threw spit balls at me, but then again that was Helga.  
  
Still I couldn't help but wonder what happened to the girl I saw last night, her 'other' side, I always knew she could be nice, well at least when you got her to open up..   
  
I turned around when I heard her sigh, I saw her writing in small blue notebook that I so often would catch a glimpse of her writing in, she had a rather peaceful look in her eyes.  
  
I'd never seen that look in her eyes before, hmm.  
  
Mr. Simmons was talking about some poem for the Monthly " Winding River Review." and I was going to write a really good poem. Maybe even as good as good as the girl that had written the poems in that pink notebook about me, I never quite knew who it was, all because Helga needed the first " spitball of the day."  
  
I rolled my eyes.  
  
" Ok now class, pull out a sheet of paper and write about anything you want, I'll be right back, I have to go to the office. Arnold, keep an eye on your classmates for me while I'm gone."  
  
I look up. " Ok." and we started writing..  
***********************************************************************************************  
Phoebe's POV  
  
I watched Helga for a second, and then looked over to Gerald. I smiled slightly and started to write.  
  
A new love:  
  
A new love was born on yesterday's eve  
between two friends so close  
It started out with a movie,  
And ended with a romantic stroll in the park.  
These two friends had known that they liked each other,  
but never quite knew that they liked, liked each other.  
But after spending the day with one another  
At the days end  
It had become finalized  
In a small yet sweet kiss,  
They learned that day, that friendship could be more  
Than just science fairs and group work,  
But a true and special bond.  
And this love was more than just a child's crush  
But, like my best friend has said.  
True love is set in stone, and souls are meant to be.  
I just hope that my soul love, thinks the same as me.'  
  
By: Phoebe H.   
  
I blushed furiously as I re-read this. ' I think that hanging around with helga, has rubbed off on me. I never was this poetic, I guess it's because I'm in love.'  
  
But could I really hand this into Mr. Simmons?? I mean, I know I should because I think it's pretty good, but this was just a little too, I don't know, different from my usual writing.  
  
I sighed and looked down at my poem. Then looked over to Gerald who was fast at work, then to Arnold who looked as equally working.  
  
Then of course over to Helga, she looked like she was dreaming, but then again, that's always how she is. I giggled slightly and decided to write something else, maybe start my math.  
***********************************************************************************************  
Gerald's POV  
  
I looked up only briefly, and then looked back at my paper. I guess I should write something, but what?  
  
I looked behind me to phoebe who was now working on her math homework, hmm.   
  
Just Friends  
  
Yesterday it tends to seem  
Was something purely from a dream  
I never imagined this would happen  
When you and I went out as friends  
We've talked quite often day to day  
You'd smile shyly at me  
And I'd flash a smile  
Now up till then we were ' just friends'   
But yesterday changed everything  
We went out to the movies  
And everything friends usually do.  
But after that things changed  
We went for a walk in the park,  
And it was then that I realized something..  
Not only did I like you..  
But I . . .I like you, like you.  
And you return my feelings.  
A small kiss you gave me, short and sweet.  
After this all has happened.  
We are no longer ' just friends.'  
  
By: Gerald J.  
  
Now where did that come from?? I thought slowly re-reading it.  
  
Hmm, oh well, I guess I could turn it in, I mean what could happen? It's not like it's going to get chosen, that Anonymous person is always chosen for everything.  
  
Which is good, so what's the hurt in doing this, now I think I'll read my sports magazine..   
  
I looked over at Arnold and wondered what HE was going to write..  
***********************************************************************************************  
Arnolds POV  
  
I wasn't too sure what I was going to write, but I thought maybe I could write about my family. No, no way! Never mind that idea, nobody would want to hear about my, 'extended family.'  
  
What could I write about?   
  
I saw Phoebe and Gerald both look up at one point, and sighed. I bet they were already done.  
  
But before I could say anything else I heard Harold laugh loudly..  
  
" OH I LOVE MY POEM!! LISTEN TO THIS EVERYONE!!"  
  
' Chocolate Chocolate I love you so much  
I love to eat you! I love sweets, fudge, caramel, and all that good stuff!  
I love sweets; they're all I can think about, Mr. Fudgie Bars, and Dum Dum Pops!  
Ice cream and Candy, cakes and  
Oh I just love sweets! Sweets, sweets, sweets!! '  
  
I rolled my eyes.  
  
Everybody laughed at him and he fell off his desk just as Mr. Simmons walks back in.  
  
" Ok class, settle down, settle down, Harold, sit down, umm are you ok?"  
  
It was a usual day..  
  
It took about 5 minutes to settle everybody down from laughing at Harold, and I heard Helga snap her gum.   
  
" Nice going pink boy." she muttered.  
  
" Madame Fortress Mommy." muttered Harold back.  
  
I rolled my eyes, and as Simmons turned to write something on the board I turned to Helga.   
  
" Helga, please be quiet, we don't want to get into trouble." I whispered then turned around when she rolled her eyes..  
  
I began to wonder if maybe she was just acting, either during the day, or--well, I threw those thoughts to the back of my mind for now.  
I Had to concentrate on class . . .  
***********************************************************************************************  
Helga's POV  
  
By the time lunch had come around, I was already deep in thought as to what to write for the ' Winding River Review."  
  
I mean, well not too deep in thought, I knew I could just take one of my less. obsessive poems and hand it in to Mr. Simmons, of course I'd be. " Anonymous," but still . . .  
  
I didn't even notice when Phoebe walked past me and sat down by Gerald, who was sitting with Sid and Nadine.  
  
But I looked up when I heard Rhonda say something, I turned around and glared at her. " What was that fashion freak?"  
  
She looked at me haughtily. " None of your business, Helga." she stared at me then turned back to talk to some of the other girls.  
  
Sheena came over and sat next to me. " Hey Helga, would it be ok if I sat by you for today? Rhonda's table is full and all."  
  
I looked up quietly, and nodded. " Yeah, yeah sure."  
  
She grinned and then started chattering away about something or another, world peace I think. I'd mutter, " yeah I know." or " Isn't it true.." or just. " yeah.." every once in a while, and she'd just keep chatting..  
  
I swear, how could she hang out with Rhonda, she was so, modest, and Rhonda was so, not.  
  
Oh well, this schools a strange place.  
  
After lunch was over me and Sheena started talking again, as we walked down the stairs, there was a loud * SPLASH * and we both screamed, blue paint right over our heads..   
  
" Oh dear!" she exclaimed and slipped and fell, taking me down with her.   
  
" Owe!! Hey that hurt!" I growled and pushed myself up.  
  
We both looked up, but nobody was there, but there were an awful lot of kids laughing at us.  
  
" Awe, shut up you idiots!" And she just laughed nervously and followed me to the office..  
  
" Mr. Wartz!!" I pounded on the door.  
  
" What is it! Oh, dear. What happened to you two children?"   
  
I rolled my eyes and replied. " We felt like going for a swim so we took a dive into a big vat of blue paint, got a problem with that, erg!! Some Morons splashed Sheena and me here with blue paint as we were walking down the stairs! Doi!"  
  
Sheena had been rather silent. " Yeah, we didn't see who though."  
  
" Yeah," I agreed angrily..  
  
He sighed and rolled his eyes muttering about, kids and no sense..  
" Ok, well you two--umm go to the girls locker room and get into your Gym uniforms or something, we can't let you leave the school grounds today, something about fumigation or something.."  
  
" Oh Criminy! I get to walk around in my Gym uniform for the rest of the day." I muttered darkly.  
  
Sheena only sighed. " At least we won't have to be laughed at for being covered in blue paint, which I still think was quite rude." she said and wrung out her hair slightly, and on my shoes.  
  
I growled slightly.  
~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~  
After we were changed I proceeded to wash my hair out in the sink, thankfully, Sheena brought hair soap to school, ' Just incase'.  
  
I guess she's ok for a geek. ok so maybe she wasn't a geek.  
  
But still! My bow would have to be washed in the washing machine, which really made me angry.  
  
So, of course what do I do? Borrow one of Phoebe's hair ties? No, I decide to leave my hair down...looking in the mirror I gasp.  
  
' Uh oh.' I ran to the locker that phoebes and I share and pulled out a pink hair tie. There was NO WAY that I was going to let Arnold see me with my hair down till I got it cut!  
  
Why? Because doi! I still had the ' Cecile ' do. And if I walked into class with that hairdo, he'd recognize me instantly. If he didn't, well then he's the densest boy in school.  
  
So I put my hair into a really quick ponytail, and me and Sheena, who was now singing softly to her self, hightailed it to art class.  
  
The door to Mr. Simmons room burst open just as Harold was running to his desk with a bucket of Red paint..* Bam * * Splash * " AH!!"   
  
A few kids snickered and the rest watched him whine then run out of the room.  
  
And a couple more, where staring at me and Sheena.  
  
" What are you looking at?!" I asked, but didn't have to, I was wearing a white tee-shirt with pink shorts, my hair, out if it's usual, Pigtails and in a Ponytail, leaving it to fall just below my shoulders, still wet from it's recent encounter with paint, and a pair of white sneakers.  
  
Then again...they could have been staring at Sheena. She was whacked out! Purple shorts, tie-die, green, blue and white Gym Shirt, and her hair was left limp but had a few blue streaks in it..  
  
I rolled my eyes and sat down at my desk.  
  
Phoebe got up and walked over. " Helga, what happened? I could hear you yelling from down in the lunchroom. "  
  
" Some dumb jerks poured blue paint on me and Sheena, I was telling Wartz." I shrugged.  
  
" You were awfully loud." she said and then smiled a little. " I like your hair in a ponytail, it looks pretty.." and she went back to her seat.  
  
I sighed and got to work.  
***********************************************************************************************  
Arnolds POV  
  
I looked up briefly from the picture I was working on when Helga announced her presence to the room.  
  
Really I wouldn't have paid her another glance, but she caught me off guard.  
  
She looked...pretty?  
  
I turned around to look at her and thought to myself. ' Helga?'   
  
She looked up from the picture she had just started.  
  
No way.  
  
" Yes football head? Whatchya want?"  
  
She heard that?!? No, she couldn't have.  
  
I fumbled for words, " Well---I, that is um.."  
  
" What? " she asked an edge creeping into her voice.  
  
" You look..pretty." I stammered out softly.  
  
She gasped slightly and for a second I thought she was going to whomp me right then and there.  
  
" Why'd you--um what did you, how come you changed?" I finally got out.  
  
She scowled slightly. " Oh, excuse me, I'm sorry if I angered you by changing my style!" she snapped.  
  
" No! That's not it! I--just what happened? I mean your hairs wet and all.."   
  
" Some jerks poured a bucket of blue paint onto me and Sheena over there after lunch." she said jerking her thumb in Sheena's direction.  
  
Who would do such a thing? " Oh, who--" I started.  
  
" Like I know who did it?"  
  
" Well I just thought maybe,"  
  
" Yeah sure, I just looked up through the river of oncoming blue paint, which by the way completely missed me by some magical powers, and saw then over the wall with my X-ray eyes." she snapped sarcastically.  
  
Wow, she's mad, though not steaming, thankfully.   
  
" Well, that was really mean of those people to do, we should find out who did it." I said.  
  
" Sure, and how would we go about doing that?" she asked rolling her eyes.  
  
I thought for a second. " Well...who doesn't quite like you?" I asked honestly.  
  
Thinking for a millisecond she replied. " Humm, let me think Arnoldo, counting you? Everybody but Phoebes, Sheena, and Mr. Simmons."  
  
" I don't hate you." I said slowly, before I thought.  
  
She looked back up at me. " You don't?"  
  
" No, of course not. You know I'll be your friend, when you need somebody to talk to vent about your family, when you're not mean, you can be really nice, and I like that." I said softly enough so nobody but her heard me.  
  
She had a very strange look in her eyes.   
  
" You mean that Arnold?"  
  
Definitely. " Definitely."   
  
She smiled softly, and that was a smile I liked better than any evil grin she could use. " Thanks Arnold, you really don't know what that means to me." She said thoughtfully.  
  
I smiled back and then turned around. " No problem Helga."  
  
What had just happened? I just had a conversation with Helga that didn't consist of putdowns and petty arguing. And, as I turned around to sneak a peak at her, she looked genuinely happy..  
  
I shrugged. Helga G. Pataki was one person I would never figure out.  
***********************************************************************************************  
Phoebe's POV  
  
I looked up for a minute when I heard Helga and Arnold talking, though I couldn't hear exactly what they were saying, it couldn't have been all that bad. I mean Helga wasn't going over to Arnold and beating him up.   
  
I smiled softly, cause after a while Helga seemed to be peaceful, that was after the conversation had ended. I'll have to question her as to the real goings on of the conversation.  
  
I gasped when I felt somebody tap me on the shoulder.   
  
Turning around I sighed in relief, as it was Gerald. " Good afternoon Gerald."  
  
" Hey Phoebes. How are ya?" he asked taking the empty desk next to mine.  
  
I blushed slightly. " I'm fine, and you?"   
  
" Great." then he thought for a second. " Hey Phoebes, I was wondering, if it's still nice outside when school ends, you want to go for a walk or something?"  
  
I grinned. " I'd love to, but I'll have to ask mother and father first."   
  
" No problem." he replied, then stood up and flashing me a very, suave smile turned to leave. " Well, I'd better get back to my seat and clean up, class is almost over."   
  
" Ok."   
  
" Ok." And with that he left.  
  
I was so happy to have Gerald as a friend.  
***********************************************************************************************  
Gerald's POV  
  
I sat down at my desk and cleaned up my paints and stuff, and just as Mr. Simmons let us all out, I caught a glimpse of something that made me fall over my desk.  
  
" What?!" * Crash *  
  
It was, ok, two things, one, Helga had changed her outfit, well, I think I know why, if it had anything to do with the reason she was yelling earlier after lunch then yeah I know, but she didn't look that bad.   
  
Wait well, hmm, and the other thing was, Arnold was willingly talking to her as everybody else left class..  
  
" Ohh.." I groaned and picked myself up.  
  
Phoebe ran over and helped me up. " Oh dear, Gerald are you alright?"   
  
" Yeah, I'm cool, nothing broken, not a thing.." I said as coolly as I could.  
  
She giggled slightly. " Ok then, well come on Gerald, we'd better go before we miss the bus."  
  
" Alrighty then, let's go." and we put our stuff in our lockers and left the building talking to each other.  
  
Getting on the bus we sat together, I passed Helga, talking to Sheena, then Arnold sitting with Sid.  
  
We sat at the back of the bus and for a while sat silently, and then started talking about our Science Fair Project.  
  
" So, Gerald, would you like to come over tomorrow to work on our Science Fair project?" she asked.  
  
" Sure, I'd love to...well that is if I'm not stuck watching Timberly." I said sarcastically.  
  
She giggled. " Your sisters really cute."  
  
" My sisters really annoying, she always wants to play super hero. You know, she even held her own stuffed animal for ransom, just cause she wanted to play detective.." I said grumbling, but I smiled as well.  
  
The bus came to a stop and phoebe got up. " Well, this is my stop Gerald, I'll call you if mother says I can go for a walk alright?"   
  
" You got it." I said winking and grinning, Sid got out as well and I moved up with Arnold..  
  
" Hey man."   
  
" Hey."   
  
And we talked for the rest of the way home.  
***********************************************************************************************  
Helga's POV  
After the day ended and I was home, I was STILL floating on air.  
  
Arnold said I was pretty! * Sighs dreamily *  
  
I cannot believe it.  
  
Running inside the house and upstairs I crashed into somebody and fell down.  
  
" Oh dear! I'm so sorry Helga!" exclaimed the person, whom I was never properly introduced to last night.  
  
" Huh? Oh, you must be Vicki, sorry we weren't introduced last night." I said taking her outstretched hand and pulling myself up.  
  
Boy was she pretty, baby blue smiling eyes, Reddish blonde hair that was pulled back into 3 braids and then a pony tail. She was 5'9", which totally put me to shame, and her outfit was. WILD! Looking like something out of the 60's or 70's she was clad in a Tie-die shirt that fell to about her waist, And a matching tie-die and flowered skirt to match that fell to just above her ankles and flared, and she wore Platform Shoes, and her make up was awesome as well...  
  
" Wow, I like your outfit." I said.  
  
She giggled. " Thanks, I put it together myself, me and Coleene, another of Olga's friends helped me...I bet I could get you into an outfit like that in no time."   
  
I waved my hands in front of me. " No thanks, that's quite alright. Umm I've got homework to do, tell Olga whenever she wants to go shopping is fine." and before she could answer I ran into my room shutting the door.  
  
I took my hair down quickly and then looked around. " Well, I guess." I rolled my eyes then thought back to the conversation me and Arnold had earlier.  
  
~*~ " I don't hate you." he said slowly,  
  
I looked back up at him. " You don't?"  
  
" No, of course not. You know I'll be your friend, when you need somebody to talk to, vent about your family. When you're not mean, you can be really nice, and I like that." he said softly enough so nobody but me heard..  
  
A very strange look passed my eyes.   
  
" You mean that Arnold?"  
  
Definitely.. " Definitely."   
  
I smiled softly, why? I don't know, I never used that smile.... " Thanks Arnold, you really don't know what that means to me." I said thoughtfully. ~*~  
  
I had started to brush my hair out, and then stopped and walked quietly into the bathroom. Looking in the mirror, I had brushed my bangs back, and the ' Cecile ' look was gone, leaving me with my hair down to about an inch or two below my shoulders. I guess, I didn't look TOO bad with my hair down.  
  
** Knock knock **  
  
" Who is it?!" I called out.  
  
" It's me little sis. " came the voice.  
  
Oh brother." What do you need Olga?"  
  
" Well...Vicki said that you were still going to go shopping with us, is that true?" her voice came off as totally hopefully.  
  
Rolling my eyes I replied. " Yes, I'm coming ok? "   
  
" Oh that's just so great! I can't wait, we're going to get you a whole new wardrobe." she said cheerily.  
  
" WHAAAT!?!?!" I screeched and fell backwards into the bathtub. " Ommph!"  
  
" Oh dear, Helga? Baby sis? Are you ok?" she opened the door and I struggled to get untangled from the shower curtains.  
  
" I'm fine Olga." I muttered rubbing my head and getting out of the tub.  
  
" My, don't you look lovely Helga..." she said, referring to my hair.   
  
" Yeah well." I shrugged.  
  
" Well come on let's go!" she said giddily and grabbed my wrist and dragged me downstairs and to the car where Vicki sat smiling.   
  
I crawled into the backseat and Vicki turned around. " This is going to be great Helga, and you'll have fun, and just incase your worried, Olga and I will help you with any homework you have when we get home, it could be a while."  
  
Groaning I buckled up, how did I get myself into this fiasco, A new wardrobe? What's wrong with the one I have now?  
  
And with that we were off to the mall..  
  
About 1/2 an hour later we arrived at a huge building with more cars and people than I've seen in a while, cause it'd been a while since I'd been to the Mall.  
  
" I have to go in there? Just for clothes??" I said backing up a little to the car.  
  
" Well, of course silly, now come on." and they dragged me in.  
  
Now, I'd be tempted to tell you every gory detail of my excursion, and, surprisingly how much money we spent, but I don't want to bore you with that drivel. so let's just fast forward to the next day..  
~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~  
  
Ok, so the next day not only did I have an all new wardrobe, but dads credit card had about $245.00 of a bill from 3 girls shopping.   
  
So I guess there was some good that came out of it.  
  
But, the problem was, Olga got me a make over, granted I didn't go peacefully. Vicki had to bribe me with 40 dollars to get me to actually go through with it.  
  
I stepped out of the car the next day at 8:15 and got quite a few looks.  
  
I turned to Olga. " Olga, if I get laughed at, I'm so going to scream." I threatened and she just giggled.   
  
" Don't worry little sis, you look perfect, just lovely."  
  
" Just lovely." I mocked and then rolled my eyes and huffed.   
  
Rhonda and a few of the other girls ran over to me. " Helga, you look---normal."   
  
I glared at her for a second, and then sighed. " Gee thanks Rhonda."  
  
" Yeah, you look great Helga, you get a make over or something?" came Sheena's voice from down the sidewalk..  
  
" Yeah? So what's your point?" I shot back.  
  
" Nothing, you look great."  
  
I had on exactly this, A Black Shirt with silver writing saying. ' girls rule ' on the front, Blue flare jeans and White 1 inch platform sneakers.( I think that's what they are..) My hair was left down, and was cut so it was now about and inch and half visibly shorter, and a little wavy, probably from sleeping in the braid that the hairdresser had put it in.  
  
To tell the truth I thought I looked horrid, but apparently I thought wrong.  
  
" See now Helga, I told you they would like it." said Olga grinning proudly.  
  
Great, I was a lab rat, and I'd fallen into her trap..  
  
" Helga?" came a familiar voice.  
  
" Arnold??" I said turning around slowly.   
***********************************************************************************************  
Arnolds POV  
  
I had just gotten off the bus with Gerald and Phoebe, and saw a couple of kids crowded around somebody, but I couldn't tell who it was, though she looked familiar.  
  
" Helga? " I asked confusedly once I got closer.  
  
" Arnold??" I heard her ask, and she turned around.  
  
And Phoebe let out a small gasp and ran over to her friend. " Helga! you look great!"  
  
Gerald on the other hand looked confused as well. " Helga G. Pataki, got a make over?"  
  
I sighed. " Who would have thought, huh Gerald."  
  
I ran up as well. " Helga? You look.."  
  
" Ridiculous? Stupid? Lame?" she snapped.  
  
" No, not exactly." I said.  
  
" I think she looks rather cool." said Rhonda a little stuffily..  
  
" Cool?? You think this is cool?? The only thing cool about it is that the whole thing cost Big Bob a good 100 dollars." she said rolling her eyes.  
  
" Well Helga, I think I'd better get back, I have to go to my apprenticeship at the hospital, see you after school little sis, bye girls." She waved and got back into her car.  
  
" Bye Olga!" chorused most of the girls.  
  
Everybody else ran into school, we had about 10 minutes left till class started.  
  
Helga stayed back and just walked slowly up the stairs talking to Phoebe.  
  
" Arnold, please tell me I'm seeing things, did HELGA G. PATAKI get a make over??" exclaimed Gerald incredulously.  
  
I shrugged and started up the stairs and into class as well.  
~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~  
We got into class and again there were even more kids crowded around Helga, who looked like she was annoyed, but still enjoying the attention.  
  
" So Helga, what made you want to get made up and stuff.." asked Nadine.  
  
" Well, it wasn't my choice, Olga made me, but I got 40 dollars out of it so that's cool."  
  
I rolled my eyes at that comment.  
  
" Still, I love your outfit Helga, did you get anymore new clothes?" asked Sheena.  
  
" Yeah, a few more outfits, nothing big, just some skirts and shirts, stuff like that. " I heard her remark with a bit of triumph in her voice, for once Rhonda wasn't the one showing off new clothes.  
  
" Well, still I bet you didn't get anything like daddy bought me when we went to France. The mink coat, my real leather jacket, the diamond necklace." Said Rhonda obviously getting a little annoyed at not being the center of attention.  
  
" That's ok, Olga and Vicki talked me into getting some silk shirt, the.." she trailed off trying to figure out what it was..  
  
Rhonda's eyes widened. " Not MY Torri Ladenburg Real silk Capree sweater!!" she exclaimed incredulously.  
  
" Torri Ladenburg, yeah, that's the one with the beaded bottom right?" she asked a small smile playing across her face.   
  
" AAAH!!!" Rhonda screamed. " I knew I should have made daddy buy it for me yesterday! Ugh!" she exclaimed and sat down huffing.  
  
" Wow." muttered a bunch of the kids and went back to talking to Helga till Mr. Simmons walked into class..  
  
" Alright class, chat time is over for now, come on, let's get started with class now, for creative writing, does anybody have their poems for Wednesday ready to turn in early?"  
  
Eugene got up and exclaimed. " I DO!! I do Mr. Simmons!!" and then ran to the front, tripping over his shoelaces and the paper flew out of his hands as he fell into the trashcan, and the paper flew out of the window and into the open breeze to who knows where, and from that side of the room we heard a muffled, "I'm ok."  
  
I watched and sighed.  
  
And after getting helped out of the trashcan he muttered dejectedly. " I guess I don't, aw my beautiful poem, gone.." he sulked back to his seat and a few kids snickered.  
  
" Th--That's ok Eugene, I'm sure you'll come up with another poem that's just as special as that last one." said. Mr. Simmons with a reassuring smile on his face.  
  
" I know." replied Eugene who soon got to writing again.  
  
And as I watch Mr. Simmons's gaze float over the almost silent class and rest on my side, I suddenly got nervous.  
  
Though as he started, " Helga," Two people stood up simultaneously and I heard a small sigh, of relief I believe, from behind me.  
  
" Oh? Gerald, Phoebe, do you two have your poems finished?"  
  
I watched as they blushed slightly.   
  
" Yes." " Sure."   
  
" Well, that's great you two!" he exclaimed.  
  
They walked up rather timidly and somewhat hesitantly handed over their poems, and after a few seconds of silence he looked up with amazement plastered on his face.  
  
" Gerald, Phoebe, these are...brilliant, very heartfelt and warm! definite choices for the Magazine, I'm very proud of you! " Mr. Simmons said grinning.  
  
They smiled at each other and then went back to their seats seemingly satisfied.  
  
" Now where was I, oh yes, does anybody else have a poem?? Helga perhaps you have another of your poems that I so greatly enjoy reading and getting to know you by?" he asked.  
  
I looked behind me to see her nervously playing with a loose strand of hair..  
  
" N--no I don't have it yet, I'm sorry Mr. Simmons.." she said rather embarrassed.  
  
" Oh! Don't be sorry Helga, inspiration will hit, don't worry." he smiled and we went on with our day.  
  
I watched as Helga got quite a few compliments and grew increasingly popular. And to tell the truth she looked happy.  
  
Either that, or she was enjoying making Rhonda miserable.  
  
At lunch time I saw her talking to Sheena, Nadine, and a few other girls, apparently she had some attitude changes to go along with her looks.  
  
Which I must admit made her look beautiful. Wait--did I just say that?  
  
I was walking past to dump my tray and over heard the last part of her conversation. " And the best thing was, it wasn't even Dave at the wedding, it was my Uncle Donnie!" she grinned and everybody burst out laughing.  
  
I shook my head, in a way she reminded me of Lila, only--wait a minute, this was truly the first time in a while I'd actually thought about Lila. why was that?  
  
Suddenly she walked up to me. " Why, hello Arnold how are you today?"  
  
I shrugged. " I'm good, and you?"  
  
" Oh, I'm ever so good, and." she said turning to look at Helga.." I'm ever so happy for Helga, she seems so much more, happier than she was before."   
  
" No kidding, she doesn't scowl or yell, and she hasn't picked on me in a while." I said, and felt relieved over that whole fact.  
  
" Well I'm just ever so glad that your happy, well I'd better get back to my table, I was talking to Eugene and Stinky about my vacation in Kentucky last year, they seemed quite interested." she said smiling that smile that had so often enchanted me..  
  
It still did in a way, but not as much as before.  
  
" Ok Lila, see you later." and I went back to my table with Sid and Gerald and Harold.   
  
" Hey guys, are we still up for the game of Football this afternoon in the park?" I asked as I sat down.  
  
" Definitely!." the others cheered.  
  
The lunch bell rang and we all agreed. " Spread the word! Football game at five!" and we all took off to class.  
  
The girls had left earlier to go do something, I don't know; well I was talking to Gerald as we turned the corner, and well, what happened?  
  
That's right, I collided with Helga.   
  
" Arnold?!" I heard her exclaim in a sort of, surprised yet happy tone. Then she shook her head, and started to yell at me. " Why---I--Sorry Arnold."   
  
That threw me for a loop, and I saw Gerald's jaw drop.   
  
I got up and offered her my hand, and once again surprising the both of us, she accepted and pulled herself up. " Just, watch where you're going next time football head." she snapped softly but it wasn't harsh..  
  
I smiled a little. " Whatever you say Helga, hey you hear, Football game at five in the park? " I asked.  
  
She stopped suddenly and I don't know, something shifted, attitude wise or not.." No I didn't hear, but I'll definitely be there.." she got a very evil look in her eyes, which made her, to tell the truth, cuter.  
  
" Arnold, hey Arnold! " (No pun intended..teehee ) I heard Gerald say..  
  
" Huh??" I said shaking my head. Apparently I had dozed slightly..  
  
" You there man? Class starts in 2 minutes! Stop day dreaming and lets go." and he took off.  
  
" Yeah, right, coming." and we ran off to class.  
***********************************************************************************************  
Helga's POV  
  
I was basically floating on air today, the whole day I was getting complimented on my hair, my outfit, and I was driving Rhonda mad with jealousy!!  
  
You don't KNOW how good it felt to make her suffer... but enough of that, once last hour came along, I was truly happy, I mean, come on, why wouldn't I be?? I was popular, I was pretty, just like Olga, and I had even caught Arnold's eye whether he wanted to realize it or not.  
  
I was almost the center of attention!! Boy was this a good day.  
  
At the end of the day, I was talking with a bunch of the others when Rhonda walked up.  
  
" Hey Rhonda." I said mock-sweetly.  
  
She looked at me. " Hello, Helga, everybody, I am throwing a party this weekend, and you are all invited." she said handing out fancy invitations, then hesitantly glared at me and handed the invitation to me..  
  
I took it and smiled, almost evilly. " This is for everybody who's cool.... and I guess YOU can come Helga, since you're semi popular." she said rolling her eyes and walking away.  
  
I watched after her. ' Hello? I AM popular, Rhondaloid..' I thought evilly to myself and crossed my arms. But then looked the invitation over and shrugged.  
  
" Oh well, come on guys why are we hanging around here, let's go get ready for football." I said and ran down the stairs and onto the bus. Me and Phoebe sat together for the first time in 3 days and Arnold and Gerald sat together.  
  
Well we talked more than ever.   
  
" Helga, I cannot believe how you've grown in popularity seemingly overnight, it's astounding, I'm so glad you are expressing yourself. " came Phoebe cheerily.  
  
I shrugged. " It's no biggie, not like I wanted to. But I got 40 dollars. And ALOT of compliments." I grinned.  
  
As the bus pulled to a stop, I jumped up. " Well. This is my stop. See ya Phoebes!" and I ran off the bus and burst into the house, and collided with Vicki again.  
  
" We really have to stop meeting like this Helga." she giggled.   
  
" Yeah I know." I grinned.  
  
" So, my little model, how was your day at school??" she asked.  
  
I grinned. " Well, let's just say, I made the local snob, Rhonda Lloyd, jealous." I said triumphantly.  
  
" Well well. I'm glad to see you had a good day." she said smiling.  
  
" Good day?? GREAT DAY is more like it! I also got invited to little miss snobs party this weekend.."   
  
" Really now...interesting." she said raising her eyes and sighing.   
  
" Well, I'm off, I have to go downtown for a while, umm you going to be ok staying home alone?" she asked.  
  
" Vicki, I'll be fine, just go." I said and practically pushed her out the door..  
  
" Well, Ok I'm going.." she giggled. " Just don't get into trouble." she said taking on a fake mocking voice.  
  
" Me?? Trouble?? NAH, I'm going to play football with the kids at five.   
So I'll see you later ok??"   
  
" Ok, I'm off!" she laughed and ran down the stairs and to her car.   
  
I ran up stairs and decided to change out of these clothes and put on something a bit cooler. It hit 70 today, strange weather we have...  
  
So I changed into my Older jean shorts and a red Tee-Shirt and then put on my sneakers and threw my hair up into a really quick pony tail and then sat down to watch a little bit of T.V. before I left.  
  
It was about 4:15 so I decided to take off, writing a note to Vicki and Olga I ran outside and down the sidewalk towards the park, just missing a phone call that was going to change my life forever when I received note of it.  
  
Right now my only concern was to have fun and enjoy being popular while it lasted. And I got to the park just as a few did at 4:50. And we started the game.   
***********************************************************************************************  
  
End chapter 4   
  
I am SO SO SO SO sorry this took so long, and I'm also sorry I changed the title.  
  
Hard to say I'm sorry will no longer take place in this story..I don't think...  
  
Hehe then again..  
  
I'm hoping the next chapter will be titled. " The Phone call." but I don't know, the Alternate title will be. " Words can always hurt me." or " It's all my fault."  
  
ONE of the three..  
  
Hmm I'd like to thank Lauren (( icybabe008@hotmail.com that right?? )) for Beta reading for me.. (yep that's right, I'm almost done beta-reading here)  
  
Ok, I'm done babbling, thanks again Lauren, and thanks QOH for the Dedication, and well, again this ones for you kid * giggles * well See ya when I see ya!! 


	5. 

" And what if I said I loved you?"  
  
Chapter 5: " The truth is the only thing that matters to me.. "  
  
By: Kay  
  
Disclaimer: Don't go there, although I must say. I don't own any rights to The " Winding River Review " that's a real thing that goes on in our school for poetry and stuff, so..well yah..  
  
AN: Again I have to thank and apologize to Lauren, for having her put up with my horrid spelling and errors and stuff.. ((Though the " ... " thing is like trailing off, or like well it's just the way I express feelings through certain characters. BAAD habit, I'm trying to quit)) ok.well ok, sweat minor everyone, Nothing Terrible is going to happen.well ok it is terrible, but there is a Method to my Madness. Hehe.so well just sit tight! And thanks to you guys for commenting on my stories!   
  
P.S. I just hope you guys don't kill me for what I'm about to do.... ((And rest assured this is NO WHERE near the end of the story, heh heh, can you say plot twist?))  
~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@  
Helga's POV  
  
By the time I got home at about 7:40 I was full of mud, well at least my backside was. I'd made the winning play! Granted it involved falling backwards into a huge mud puddle to catch the ball but hey, what's a little mud for winning?  
  
As I walked in the house I could feel that something was wrong. The house was deathly silent. No radio, no T.V. no chatting.  
  
" Olga? Vicki??...." I trailed off and looked around. " Anybody?" silence.  
  
Curious I made my way up the steps. but realized my muddy clothes and decided to quickly throw on some P.J's.. I could wash my hair in a while.  
Then I heard sobbing from Olga's room...and Vicki talking softly..  
  
I opened the door to find Olga laying on her bed crying and Vicki trying to make her feel better.  
  
" What happened? Olga get a B+ on her report card again?" I asked sarcastically making Vicki jump and Olga gasp in her pillow.  
  
" Oh, Helga---hello.." said Vicki nervously.  
  
" So? what's the deal?" I asked leaning against the door frame crossing my arms, waiting for an answer.  
  
Vicki sighed and I heard pain in her voice.  
" Well Helga, since I'm not sure if Olga's gunna be able to tell you, I will, but you should sit down or something.." she said referring to the desk chair by the bed..  
  
So moving there silently I watched her eyes follow me till I sat down and got comfortable. " Now what's the deal Vicki, what happened? tell me! Please?"  
I said impatiently.  
  
She drew in a shaky breath and said forthright. " Helga, there was an accident."   
  
My heart stopped, because my first thought was Arnold...but then I realized just how hard Olga was taking this, so that wasn't it. " Who?" my voice came out as a timid whisper, which I cursed silently.  
  
" Your parents." she said and Olga made a strange sound and only started to cry louder...  
  
Vicki noted this and took my hand and pulled me out of the room...  
  
" My parents...in an accident. How? What happened? Are they ok?" I asked right away hoping for some information.  
  
" I--I'm sorry Helga, they died on the scene.."   
  
My blood ran cold as ice. I felt like I wanted to pass out. Why? I don't know, even though we never got along that well, I loved my parents, they had their moments of clarity in life...and that was gone. How could this happen, this cruel world! " How..." was all I said.  
  
" Well, Helga, your fathers meeting got canceled, on account of the president of some major corp got food poisoning and couldn't make it. So he decided to go down to Lousiana to visit your mother.." she said softly, not sure what my reaction was..  
  
" Probably just to get away from me for as long as possible." I said sarcastically hiding the sudden urge to cry.  
  
" No. He was worried, I guess. I don't know, anyways, they were going to town yesterday, and---well they were sideswiped by a semi whose brakes died. They died instantly." I took in the information and nodded silently.  
  
So what's the first thing I say? " Who's gunna run the emporium?"   
  
Vicki sighed and said. " Well, I talked to your Uncle Benjamin in Denver, and he said he'll come up, since he had wanted to run it the last time he visited. He said he's moving up here, and you can stay in your house, cause he'll move in if you like. Take care of you while Olga is back in college." she said softly.  
  
I shook my head. " Whatever. I don't care...hey Vicki, would you excuse me. I have to go take a shower, as you can see my hair is caked in mud, not very good now is it?" I said fighting back tears that were threatening to fall.  
  
She sighed, and I could tell she was trying to figure out how I was taking this. But I wasn't gunna let her. So I ran down the hall and into the bathroom, slamming the door I turned on the shower and undressed and got in..  
  
I was in there for nearly 2 hours...mostly thinking, I had thankfully won the battle and didn't cry once, yet.   
  
After I got out, I grabbed a robe and softly made my way to my bedroom, hopefully without getting any attention..  
  
And once safely in my room, I slipped silently in, and sat down on my bed.  
Thinking..How could this happen? I mean, I know they never really paid attention to me, or noticed me around, or even got my name right, I know mom was always drunk and needing ' a smoothie ' but I also knew they loved me..Deep down even if they hid it with all their might I knew they loved me...even if only Miriam did. I couldn't believe this, my parents were gone, what was I going to say to everyone who asked.  
  
Wait, if they don't know about it, how can they ask? Well. They'll just never have to know about it now won't they? I'm good at covering up my feelings. I mean I've hidden my obsessive love for Arnold for 6 years haven't I? I can hide this too.  
  
It's just like adding another part to my act. Simple. Right?  
  
I went to bed that night at 9:30, thinking about what I was going to tell Dr. Bliss if she already knew about this whole incident.  
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Waking up the next morning and 3:30 I rolled over and sighed. I obviously wasn't going to get any sleep.  
  
So I crawled out of bed and got dressed, throwing on a pair of Capri's and a deep red T-shirt and putting on my sneakers I threw my hair into a half ponytail and left the room, homework in hand and set to lie once more.  
  
Going downstairs I found it empty, doi! it was only 3:30 in the morning why would anybody else be awake? I thought sarcastically to myself as I sat down in the kitchen at the table and laid my head on my arms.   
  
I closed my eyes and thought for a while. I remembered when Bob tried to spend ' Quantity ' time with me and then at the end we ended up bonding after he got the tickets to the most horrible yet funny Broadway show on earth. " Rats " I don't think I ever laughed so hard in my life.  
  
Or when mom ended up having to take over for him when he hurt his back. She gave up her job because as she put it. " I have my whole life to go back to work, but only one chance to be a mom." and she did change a bit after that.   
  
When I opened my eyes again it was 6:30 and Vicki was walking around the kitchen softly.  
  
I must've dosed.   
  
" Well good morning sleepy head." she said softly.  
  
" Morning." I muttered tonelessly.  
  
" I see you're already ready for school huh? Couldn't sleep last night?"   
  
" No. I--I mean yes I could! I just got up at 5 o'clock ok? Let's leave it at that!" and I got up and grabbed my stuff.   
  
She gasped softly as I stomped out of the room. " Helga?"  
  
" What?" I said angrily..  
  
" Are you going to be ok? do you want to stay home from school?" she said taking a step towards me.  
  
" No! now leave me alone! I'm going to school, I'll be just fine! life'll go on won't it? we'll all be peachy freaken keen." And with that I grabbed the lunch I had made the night before and slammed the door to my house and ran down the sidewalk.  
  
Once across the street I stopped. " Great, it's nearly 7:00 in the morning, who in their right minds would be up THIS early in the morning." I sighed and leaned against the wall.." what am I going to do?" I pulled out my locket and looked at his picture..and a strange feeling of relief washed over my body..  
  
" Oh arnold, for years I watched as you trudged through life without your parents, but you always kept an optimistic look on life..I've heard you say that they'd be found or that they'd come back. Now I must also walk that trek of life..losing my parents came as a big shock to me..the shock being that I cared, that I was sad, that I wanted to die as well..oh my beloved how do you do this? is it a masquarade? can you truely believe that after 8 years they are going to find your parents and everything will be fine again? can you honestly believe that?" I trailed off and looked around, still empty sidewalks..  
  
" Cause I don't know if I can.."   
***********************************************************************  
Arnolds POV  
  
I woke up that morning at 7:45. (( which by the way, at that time helga is already at school and sitting on the steps )) I had a very strange feeling in my stomache..  
  
Thankfully all was silent..which meant one of two things at this time of the morning. Either everyone was asleep, or Grandma had herded everyone and locked them in the basement like that one time---* stops and shakes his head * no way, they're asleep.  
  
So I got dressed and went downstairs. And found oskar sleeping on the couch, teddy bear in hand and sucking his thumb. Looks like him and Mrs. Kokoshka had a fight again last night.   
  
I rolled my eyes and went into the kitchen for a bowl of cereal.  
  
And after listening to Oskar beg Susie to take him back in his sleep for 20 painful minutes, then fall off the couch and asleep on the floor I got up and decided to walk to school that morning..  
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8:15am  
  
I got to school and saw quite a few kids sitting around outside the school. Looking around for any of my friends I wondered where Gerald or Phoebe was..or even Helga..  
  
Deciding i wanted to be alone for a while I walked around to the playground and found Helga sitting on a swing motionless.  
  
She must have been deep in thought because I had to shake her to get her attention. " HELGA!"  
  
" Huh?" she voice came out as confused at first then she shrugged my hands off her shoulders. " what do you want?"   
  
" What's up? You seemed pretty out of it---anything wrong?" I asked.  
  
She shook her head and stammered out " Huh? wrong--me? anything? oh no! nothing uh--look i gotta go ok?" and she rushed from the playground and into school leaving me there confused and concerned.  
  
" That was strange.."   
  
But, by the time class actually started I put it off to nerves, I mean she looked just fine, she smiled like usual, smiled beautifully infact, and her eyes seemed to be a deeper shade of crystal blue today.. * stops * I mentally slapped myself ' was i just---nahh.'   
  
Continuing on with the day I found myself more attentive to Helga and her strange attitude. She would act perfectly fine and content in public, but then I would catch glimpses of her when she was alone, acting really sad and depressed.  
  
But everytime I asked her about it or tried to start a conversation she would blow me off..like the last 6 years..  
  
" Will I ever understand her?" I asked myself as the day came to an end. me and Gerald met on teh bus and talked for the first time that day. Doing our favorite hand shake we sat together, phoebe in the seat next to ours.   
  
" Hey man.." " Hey gerald.." and the bus took off.  
***********************************************************************  
Helga's POV  
  
I'm not too sure, but I think I may just be fooling everybody with the new found secret of mine. Although Arnold seems a bit worried, I'll have to act extra happy around him. I mean it's not like this secret is actually---oh who am I kidding?! I'm torn up inside!! I never thought I'd say this but, I love my parents--or would have if given the chance. I mean come on! they barely knew I existed! and when olga was around I was a slave! so either way.. * sighs * I don't know, my parents did actually have their good days, they tried to spend " Quantity " time with me, or to improve relationships.. and what do I go and do? Blow them off! am that big of a jerk? that big of a bully that I can't even see when people are TRYING to give me a little affection? Doi! of course I am.  
  
As I contiuned to walk subconsiously towards my psycologist meeting with Dr. Bliss I stopped..and decided that it was my fault they were dead. Maybe this is some form of twisted torture from the big guy for being Helga G. Pataki the Bully! or a way of making me pay for picking on my beloved.  
  
Well whatever it was I probably deserved all if i---AHH!! I shook myself from my mental beration intime to jump out of the way of a speeding car.  
  
" oww!" I cried out as I crashed into the curb and hit my shoulder.  
  
" oohh.." I mumbled getting up and rubbing my arm. It really hurt. How would I explain this to Olga? or Dr. Bliss even? Just tell them I was blaming myself for the death of my parents and I stopped in the middle of the road when a car was coming HA!  
  
Looking up I found myself infront of the building I was heading to.. Dr. Blisses work. The Psycologist.  
  
Cradling my arm I walked in and caught sight of a clock and sighed. " 4:30? I'm early.."  
  
I walked up to the reception desk. " Excuse me?"   
  
The girl looked up at me from her magazine and sighed. " Yeah? what is it little girl? "   
  
" Does Dr. Bliss have a patient right now?"   
  
" Lemme check." she said her snappy attitude and bubbly features getting on my nerves. She flipped through a few pages. " No..not till 5:15."  
  
" Could I possibly go up?"   
  
" Whatteva ya want kid." she muttered out and went back to her magazine.  
  
" Oh please?" I muttered under my breath as I went to Dr. Blisses office, and knocked on the door..  
  
" Dr. Bliss?" I called  
  
" Helga?" came a muffled voice from inside.. " come on in."  
  
I opened the door, and tried to put my arm down, but it hurt too much. So I just crossed my arms.  
  
" Uh..hi." I said avoiding eye contact.  
  
" Hello Helga, what brings you here so early? did you want to talk about--you know, your parents.." she said.  
  
" So you knew--" I said softly sitting down.  
  
" Yes, Olga called and told me. How do you feel about that Helga?" she asked me.  
  
Sighing I shrugged. " Am I spose to care?"   
  
She looked at me straight in the eye. " I think we both know the answer to that Helga. " she said matter-of-factly.  
  
I rolled my eyes. " ok, so maybe I do care, maybe I'm really upset by this. Maybe!--maybe I don't know how I feel." I trailed off.  
  
She looked at my with a very small smile. " You know Helga it's ok to cry, you've just lost your mother and father."   
  
I looked up at her my anger showing around the mask I was wearing.  
" Cry? you expect me to cry? You expect ME, Helga G. Pataki to CRY over losing my family?! Why should i! not like they cared about me!! It's not like they would have noticed if I was hit by a car or anything. Bob would probably just come to the hospital to make sure the bill wasn't going to cost too much, and Mirium..Mirium..oh there's a piece of work! All she'd say is. ' I need a smoothie ' " I said mocking her almost perfectly. A strand of my hair fell over my face and I grunted.   
  
" Look at me! this isn't me!!" I said reffering to the red sweater and pants. " I look like a pansy! how could I of let this happen, when did I lose control of my life huh?" I said angrily and slammed my fist down on the table sending papers flying and a sharp pain up my arm. " OW!"  
  
Dr. Bliss had, up until that point let me vent all the anger that I needed to. She learned it was best that I get my feelings out. But a look of concern passed her eyes when I hissed in pain and pulled my arm back into it's cradling position.  
  
" Helga? what's the matter?" she asked.  
  
" N--no--nothing! nothing's the matter.." I laughed nervously. " Why would you say anythings the matter?"   
  
She looked at me. " Well then let me see your arm.." she said her voice monotone.  
  
I looked at her and as slowly as possible straightened my arm, and as best as I could swallowed the pain screaming.   
  
She sighed. " Helga what happened?"   
  
I glared at her. " What makes you think anything happened. " I shot out.  
  
" You got hurt didn't you. Does anybody know?" she asked  
  
" How could they know? it just happened.." I said thinking I was hiding something, then with my good arm smacked my forehead..dooped again.  
  
" I see..and what 'just happened.' helga?"  
  
I sighed. " Fine! if you must know. I was walking across the street, not paying attention and had to jump out of the way of a speeding car. I short of hit my shoulder on the curb. Now it hurts to move it.. THERE you happy?!" I growled slightly.  
  
She nodded her head once then sighed. " Helga, come on, let's get you down to the doctors. You should have it checked out. " she said and I looked at her.  
  
" What?! bu--but why?"   
  
" Helga..come on..." she said keeping her voice one tone..  
  
I grumbled and followed her out the door of her office and down the hall.   
  
" Tracy..hold my calls for me, I'm going out for a minute.." I heard her say to that snobby clerk at the desk..  
  
So that's the name huh..heh.  
  
As we climbed into her car, which I noticed was really nice. " Is this car new?"  
  
She nodded. " Reasonably so yes..why? do you like it?"   
  
It was my turn to nod. " yeah I do.." after that it was a pretty silent ride..  
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After we arrived at the hospital I started to complain..   
" Do I HONESTLY have to go in there? Man! Big Bob's gonna have a----fit.." I stopped dead in my tracks, and for a minor second I felt like crying..but then for the first time since saturday really my defenses came up and through gritted teeth I said. " Oh that's right, he can't---he's DEAD." and stomped into the waiting room.  
  
Soon after were in the doctors office, and being examined. And the old man ( ya you know the one, from ' Grandpa's birthday? ' ) said. " Can you extend your arm for me now helga?"  
  
I sighed frustratedly. " No, DOC I can't! that's why I'm HERE in the FIRST PLACE! " i almost shouted.  
  
Dr. Bliss spotted this anger and cut in. " See, doctor she jammed her shoulder on a curb of a sidewalk. Now she can't extend her arm without a great deal of pain."   
  
I blinked twice.. " Yeah what she said."  
  
" Ohhhh----well then. I'd go as far as saying you've sprained yer shoulder blade pretty bad. " he said.  
  
" Oh? are you sure that's all?" I asked rubbing my arm.  
  
" It's probably a pretty bad sprain, but don't worry it's not broken you CAN move it." he finished statedly. " Let me just see.." he trailed off pulling up the sleeve of my sweater and nodding. " Yep, just as I suspected, swelling pretty bad."  
  
I made a face. " What's your point?"  
  
He chuckled, but went serious again. " My point is that it's a bad sprain, you musta' jammed it pretty darn good to do that. I'll have to give ya wrap ( half cast? ) and I recommend you put an Ice Pak on it for 20 minutes a day for the next 4 days. That should do it. " he said then wrapped gauze around my arm from my shoulder blade to my elbow then gave me a sling.   
  
" Now, just be sure not to jarr it any worse than it already is..and take it easy. Okay?"  
  
I nodded silently hopping off the table.  
  
" If you have anymore problems come back ya hear?"  
  
And with that we took off, in silence, back to the office.  
  
Once in I made a face at Tracy and she gave me an evil look and rolled her eyes.  
  
Then we reached the office.  
  
" Now Helga, are you sure you don't just want to go home and rest?" Dr. Bliss asked.  
  
I shook my head. " Yeah, I'm sure. I wanna talk."  
  
She raised an eyebrow. " About what?"  
  
" Life, School..Arnold." I said gaging her reaction.  
  
She smiled slightly. " How is it going between you two." she asked.  
  
I grinned " Great! I'm--he's--we're, well we talk now! i don't pick on him half as much and HE seems to be watching ME lately." I said still unbelieving but smiling.  
  
" Well you did go through a pretty drastic change in such a short time right? Monday old you, Tuesday new you? You've caught him off-guard, I think he may be realizing feelings that he may have been hiding or are just now realizing." she said.  
  
" Wow, that's deep." I added.  
  
Chuckling Dr. Bliss stood up and came to sit beside me on the chair. " So, Helga, no pushing just curious---are you--do you suppose you're near ready to confess?"  
  
I looked up at her. " I think--I think--yeah I am..I think so, I was, planning on telling him umm after Rhondaloids party saturday."  
  
" Oh, I see.." she nodded in understanding.  
  
I smiled and she looked at me. " If you need help with you know, confessing, you could always come visit me saturday, it's my day off, but you know where I live. " she smiled.   
  
I smiled and we chatted for the rest of the time about certain aspects of life..  
~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@  
By the time I got home it was 6:30 and Olga was---well somewhere, and no doubt Vicki was with her.  
  
" Great, just great, now who am I going to talk to?" I stopped in the kitchen to grab an Ice Pak, then the phone and settled on the couch, ice pak on my left arm, MTV2 on, and I dialed the only other persons number I could..  
  
" Moshi-Moshi?" came an older voice.  
  
" Oh..Moshi-Moshi Mr. Hyerdal..is Phoebe there?" I asked.  
  
" Hai, Helga she is, one minute." he said and I heard a small clunk as he put the phone down. And soon after Phoebe answered.  
  
" Moshi-Moshi Helga.." came her ever cheerful voice.  
  
" Hey phoebes.." I sighed. " Could you come over?" I asked, and the weariness of the days events showed through.  
  
" Um..well Gerald and I were working on our Science Fair Project. " she trailed off.  
  
" Oh.." I said dejectedly  
  
" Helga? Is something the matter?"   
  
" I--yes.." I said flatly the nausea returning once more..  
  
" Oh, dear--helga I'll be right over, let me just tell my parents and say farewell to Gerald." she said..  
  
" Ok phoebes.." i said half heartedly.  
  
" Sayoonara.." she said and hung up.  
  
I sighed and hung up as well..  
  
" Please, just give me strength.." I said softly and rested my head on the couch..  
***********************************************************************  
Phoebe's POV  
  
I hurried to my room " Gerald? "  
  
" Yeah? " he asked looking up.  
  
" I'm terribly sorry, but Helga was on the phone and she sounded terribly disturbed...she asked for me to go to her house, I believe she may need my assistance. Oh I hope you don't mind."  
  
He sighed. " It's alright I'd better be getting back home anyways." He walked over to me and we walked to the door.  
  
" Mother, Father, I'm going over to Helga's she needs my assistance." I called out..  
  
" Ok dear! be back by 9!"  
  
" Alright.."  
  
Since he lived about a block from Helga's, Gerald walked me there.  
  
" Take care." he said..  
  
" ok..." I blushed.  
  
" Catch ya later!" he grinned and took off down the street.  
  
I knocked on the door and heard ' it's open! '  
  
" Hmm.." I walked in  
  
" Helga?"  
  
" In the living room" came a seemingly depressed helga.  
  
" Oh dear.." i walked in and saw her and gasped. " HELGA?! what happened to your arm!?"  
  
She looked up at me.. " Hey..umm..yeah, jammed my shoulder, looong story.."  
  
" Oh??"  
  
Now I felt guilty for my hesitance to come over.  
  
I caught ear of the music video that she'd been watching..  
  
@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@  
" You've grown colder now, torn apart angry turned around well that whole made season knock you down..  
So are ya gunna stand there or are ya gunna help me out?"  
@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@  
  
She sighed and turned it down a bit..  
  
" Phoebes.."  
  
" yes? what's wrong?" I asked going over and sitting at the edge of the couch.  
  
" My parents are dead. " she said bluntly.   
  
" WHAT?!" I gasped.  
  
" Oh No Helga!! this--I'm so sorry!!"  
  
The song lyrics drifted to my ears again and I heard Helga grumble..  
  
@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@  
" You've figured me out, that I'm lost and I'm hopeless I'm bleeding and broken, though I've never spoken I come undone..  
In this mad season.."  
@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@  
  
" stupid song.." she muttered..  
  
@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@  
" And Now I'm cryin isn't that what you want? And i'm tryin to live my life on my own.. but I won't!."  
@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@  
  
She slammed the T.V off..  
  
" STUPID SONG!!"  
  
I could tell her defensive shell she wore so often was back up..  
" Helga? is there anything you'd like to talk about?" I asked softly.  
  
" You sound like Dr. Bliss.." She said smiling wryly.  
  
" I do?" i asked.  
  
" yep.." she smirked.  
  
" What happened to your..parents helga?" I asked..  
  
She sighed sadly and told me everything, about the accident, even about what she said to Vicki when this happened.  
  
Then she told me how she got the Cast..  
  
" I was walking down the street towards my Psycologist appointment..well I crossed the street somewhat automatically, and stopped in the middle of the road ..it was horrible..I mean--well..suddenly I hear the honking of a horn and I scream and jump out of the way only to smash into the curb of the sidewalk and jammed my shoulder..it HURT!.." she said..  
  
" Oh helga that's just..horrible.." I cried..  
  
" Don't I know it.." she said rubbing her arm and smiling wryly.  
  
I sighed and there was a tense silence between us before she broke the silence.  
  
" So phoebes, how's it goin' between you and hair bo---Gerald.."   
  
I blushed slightly and smiled. " It's going quite well thank you.."  
  
She smiled. " I'm glad to hear that Phoebes.." and then she sighed.  
  
" Boy I'm a moron, i could of atleast pretended to be paying attention to where I was going.."   
  
" That's not true helga...it was just an accident, the car could have been going much fast than it should have been at any rate." I said matter-of-factly then they both looked towards the doorway as the front door opened and two people walked in..  
  
Olga looked horrible, and Vicki looked tired. " Oh, hello helga, hello..umm..helga's friend.."  
  
" Phoebe.."   
  
They both stopped when they saw helga's arm in a sling..  
  
" Helga?!?! what happened to your arm!!" Olga gasped.  
  
" I was almost hit by a car while mindlessly crossing the street without paying attention and I slammed into the edge of a curb, and jammed my shoulder..no biggie, just gotta keep the sling on till the swelling goes down..and the ice pak on for 20 minutes a day for the next 4 days..no biggie.. " she smiles  
  
I sigh softly. " Helga..if you'll excuse me, I'd better be getting home ok? I'll see you in school tomorrow.."   
  
She looks up. " wait.." and she hops off the couch and takes me to the door.   
" Thanks for listening to my phoebes, I had to tell somebody about it..nobody but Dr. Bliss knows..so don't tell ANYBODY, not even Gerald..please?"  
  
I nodded. " don't worry Helga..I won't..and if you do by any chance want to stay home from school tomorrow, I'll understand, and tell them that you caught a cold or something.." I offered..  
  
She smiled. " No, it's ok..I'll be fine ok? thanks phoebes your a true friend.." and she did something that she rarely does, hugged me..I was surprised at first but then I returned the hug and went home..   
***********************************************************************  
Arnolds POV  
  
The next few days of school went reletivly fast, and eventless, save for when Helga FIRST came to school on wednesday. Everybody was asking her what happened, I think she told the same story about a 100 times..  
  
I wasn't too sure if she'd talk to me so I kinda stayed out of her way for the day. But I did keep an eye on her, and found nothing to be out of sorts. She always carried a smile. * which if you ask me was fake..* and was always peppy, and still wallowed in joy at the fact that she was making Rhonda miserable..  
  
Then again, Helga G. Pataki going from bully to beauty in just one night..well come on! that IS a surprise and caught everybody off-guard.   
  
So when she came over wednesday night I didn't expect much chatting infact I half expected her to be back to her old self, angry and defensive..  
  
Ok, so i got defensive but not angry. And for that I was thankful. She didn't yell but she wouldn't open up for anything, and that worried me.   
  
I figured she was just I don't know. Nervous maybe? No it was just the way she was I guess, Rome wasn't built in a day ya know..  
  
So our project came along great..and the week proceeded..and finally..FINALLY came Saturday..  
~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@  
But as I woke up that morning I had a strange feeling of dread in my stomache, why? don't ask me.  
  
I just felt like something terrible was going to happen today.  
  
Now, normally the parties Rhonda throw would mean nothing after the last one she threw the " Cool Party " but this one is different. She shaped up afterwards and now was throwing a huge party. For everyone!  
  
It was an end of the school year thing. Considering the fact that after the science fair we'll be out for the summer.  
  
As usual I went downstairs and found only grandma, grandpa, and suzie kokoshka in the kitchen.  
  
" Morning everybody." I said..  
  
" Morning Arnold "  
" Morning shortman "  
" Morning Tex."   
  
I smirked and sat down for breakfast.   
  
And after eating, ran upstairs to my room and called Gerald. " Hey Gerald.."  
  
" Hey Arnold, what's up man?" he replied  
  
We talked till 10:30, planning out the days events.  
  
12:00 - Kickball with the gang.  
2 or 3:00 - Go to Slaucens for a snack.  
3:45 - Arcade Time.  
4 or 5:45 - Breaktime ( or aka Gerald and Phoebe Time )  
7:00 till ----- : Rhonda's Party  
  
Man this was going to be GREAT!  
  
So after getting changed I ran downstairs and out the door calling out. " I'm going out for the day grandpa!"  
  
" Have fun shortman." I a voice lingered from ' the office '  
  
I wonder what helga's doing now...  
*****************************************************************  
Helga's POV  
  
After the week I've had, I wasn't all too sure I even wanted to go to Rhondaloids party.  
  
But the one thing keeping me going is, as usual, Arnold.  
  
If going means a chance at getting closer to him, then I'm there!  
  
I mean, what's the worse that could happen?   
  
He could say no. And that terrifies me, but two months ago he told Lila that he liked me.  
  
So after this change, which by the way I STILL hate. He should like me, like me..  
  
Right?  
~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@  
  
Well my day consisted of a game of kickball.  
  
Hard to do with my sling but hey, it was fun.  
  
Then everybody went out for something to eat, and it did take my mind off of...well you know, my parents and all--when everybody else decided to go to the Arcade I declined and came back home for my final 20 minutes of Iceing. At which time I slipped on my headset and sat down at the couch Ice on my hsoulder and music playing ( Matchbox 20 of course ) and I dozed...  
  
Till about 5:30, when I woke up to somebody tapping me on the shoulder. " Huh?" I said taking off my headset.   
  
" I said, Helga, you got a phone call from Phoebe. She wanted to tell you that she was going to be with Gerald till the party but that she'd meet you there instead of you two going in together as originally planned. " said Vicki taking the ice pak and disapearing into the kitchen.  
  
" Thanks Vik! " I called out and ran upstairs into my room, shutting the door I looked around and flopped down on my bed. I took the sling off to see if it was ok and it was, tense a bit, but I could move it. So I tossed the sling itself into the waste basket and left the bandages on for a while longer.   
  
Well not too much longer, because I soon after got into the shower. And then got ready for the party..  
  
Clad in a---pink caprini sweater and a black silk skirt that, like Vicki's, fell to just above her ankles, and my hair pulled back into a french twist thanks to Olga of course, I had on my black plat forms and well--that was pretty much it.  
  
By the time 6:30 rolled around I was ready to go. Though I must admit I wasn't in the best of moods, I had a feeling something was gunna happen and I wasn't going to like it.  
  
But hey maybe it's just me. I hope so anyways..  
  
I ran downstairs and since Olga was out--doing something I think she was talking to friends or something, I asked Vicki.  
  
" Hey Vicki, could you take me down to Rhonda Lloyds party?"   
  
She looked up from the phone conversation she was having and smirked. " Sure Helga, just a minute ok? Just let me tell Constance bye." she added.  
  
" Sure..umm I'll go--do something." I said and ran upstairs. Of course what else would I do, but before I even got into my room she called up. " Come on Helga!"   
  
I sighed and shrugged. " Oh well." and ran downstairs and out into the car.  
  
As she started up I grinned. " Thanks for this Vick, I really didn't want to have to walk all the way down there..the party's not worth THAT much trouble."   
  
Chuckling she rolled her eyes. " I see. Well then off we go. " and we took off.  
  
It took her a matter of about 5 minutes to get there. ( can we say speed demon? ). She must have broken the speed limit atleast 3 times!  
  
Once we stopped infront of Rhonda's place I grinned. " Vicki..did anybody ever tell you, you drive like your in the Indy 5000?"   
  
She smiled proudly. " Once or twice.."   
  
Rolling my eyes I got out of the car. " Well..I guess I'll see you at home or something." and ran up to the steps.  
  
Knocking on the door Rhonda answered and got a slightly disgusted look in her eyes. " Oh..it's YOU helga..well since your here, you may as well stay.." and she let me go in..  
  
" Your just ' ever so ' kind Rhonda.." I said in mock sweetness.  
  
I walked in and spotted Lila talking to some of the boys..and then they laughed.   
" Gee, miss lila you sure are funny!" said stinky his southern drawl all to apparent.  
  
I rolled my eyes and walked over to the punch bowl. Only to be joined by Lila. " Why hello Helga..I must say you look ever so lovely in that outfit." she pointed out.  
  
" Why thank you Lila, and I must say, YOU look ' ever so ' lovely in your outfit as well.." i mocked, though she didn't catch on and just smiled.   
  
" Thank you Helga.." and walked off.  
  
" Lila..such a goody good..only now I have something she doesn't. " i grinned almost evily to myself. " The attention of one certain football head...Arnold.." and as I said that the door knocked and he came in.  
  
" Well speak of the devil." I muttered to myself with a genuinely happy smile across my face.  
  
I decided to start up a conversation so I made my way through the hoard of kids and stumbled over to Arnold. " Hey arnold, what's up?" I asked.  
  
" Oh nothing Hel---ga?" he trailed off.. " wow, you look great."   
  
I smiled to myself. " Really?? you like this outfit? " I smiled sweetly and then added. " You look great too." and the conversation stayed small for a while..  
  
For a few hours the party went great, talking, dancing, music, everything, until I caught hold of a conversation between Rhonda and Ashely Olden.   
  
" Yeah i know, it was a great idea of mine wasn't it Ashely, I mean those two NEVER knew what hit them.. and did you hear Helga yelling at Wartz?.." they snickered evily. And the last of my resolves to be nice fell to the ground along with the plate of crackers and cheese I had with me..  
  
Arnold looked at me with concern.. is something the matter Helga? " I ignored him and like before pushed a few kids out of my way till I reached Rhonda's little Cliche'.  
  
They were giggling till I tapped Rhonda on the shoulder.. " yes I---" she turned around. " Helga??! what are YOU doing?" she exclaimed.  
  
" So it was YOU and your loser friends who dumped the paint on me and Sheena the other day?" I said accusingly.  
  
" Of course not..why would we do something so tacky." she said huffily..  
  
At that Sheena walked over from across the room..   
  
" Oh give it up Fashion Queen. I heard you talking to Ashely, your nothing but a stuck up snob you know that?" I said angrily fists clenched at my sides.  
  
She gasped. " I am not! Atleast I have better fashion sense than YOU Helga G. Pataki." she shot back..  
  
" Better fashion sense? and a big mouth to go with it.. Your father buy you that too? "   
  
" How dare you! you--ugh! you deserved what you got you jerk! And I'm glad I did it..infact I'd do it again, it got you to change out of that--outrageous outfit. Though I must say, not much of an improvement. " she said snobbily reffering to my outfit.  
  
" Oh, excuse me for insulting her fasion majesty."  
  
and we continued to bicker..  
***********************************************************************  
Arnolds POV  
  
I watched the fight for a minute before I heard some of the comebacks..I had to stop this somehow..  
  
So I pushed my way through the gathering crowed around the four girls.. Sheena, Ashely, Rhonda and Helga and stopped behind them. Oh Helga looked ready to kill, her fists were clenched and she was throwing sarcastic comebacks like i'd never heard.  
  
" Hey! can't we just work this out..come on girls stop fighting." I tried to calm them down.  
  
" Stay out of this Arnold, if you know what's good for you." Threatened Ashely.  
  
I gulped at the taller girl then gathered my strength and pushed my way between Rhonda and Helga who were now basically at eachothers throats.  
  
" WOULD YOU STOP FIGHTING!" I yelled and they both stopped and looked at me with a blank expression.  
  
Helga backed up. " Fine Arnold, I'll stop fighting, it's not worth a good fight with that pampous, and overly self-absorbed...Fashion Drone. Maybe I'll just leave."   
  
I watched Rhonda for a reaction, and got one. " You---You...Creep! you know I did think you were semi cool, after you finally gave up that bully thing, and that awful ensamble you called an outfit. But now, I don't care. You know what? Your such a loser that even your parents hate you! They probably hate you s-so much that they wish you were dead!" she was so furious, and having a hard time with a comeback..  
  
And that brought silence throughout the whole room. Even the music stopped.  
  
I don't know but something wasn't right. Helga wasn't going A-wall on her or anything she was just standing there, fists clenched at her sides.  
  
She looked up and said quietly. " So the fashion drone figures it out.." she took out the french braid and let her hair just fall loose. " She finally got something right for once..my parents DO hate me.. or atleast they did. Before they died. And you know what? I'm TIRED of conforming to your bourgeois boundries! I won't do it anymore you hear me?? If you can't like me for me, then--too bad!!" and with that she walked out of the room. All eyes on either her, or Rhonda.  
  
I looked at Rhonda for a minute and she had a very huffy look in her eyes as she turned around to talk to Ashley again while Sheena sort of, faded from the crowd.  
  
I saw Lila with a strange expression on her face and I knew that this was the strange feeling I had when I first woke up this morning.  
  
I did the only thing I could do, and ran out of the building and after Helga. But when I got outside and looked around she was no where in sight.  
  
' Where'd she go? ' well I'd just have to find her, and I had a pretty good idea of where to find her.   
***********************************************************************  
Helga's POV  
  
As I ran home I knew that I had just yelled it out to the world about my parents. I had basically made a fool of myself. Sheesh, I should have yelled. ' And by the way, I LOVE ARNOLD!' while I was at it.. top off my embarresment and anger.  
  
I ran upstairs, passed a very concerned Vicki, slammed my door and took all of the clothes they had so recently bought me and threw them either out the open window or just hurled them across the room. I felt like I was having a mental breakdown. " They think they can tell me what to do, how to act, well they thought wrong! nobody tells Helga G. Pataki how to act and get's away with it! I'm TIRED of this masquarade! Tired of it!" I yelled and threw some more clothes this time hitting my C.D. player and turning on my Matchbox 20 C.D. to of course the song I had it set to repeat. ' Bent' and 'Bed of Lies' I didn't care, I took off the skirt and sweater, and put on my old dress, though I left my hair down. I held the bow in my hand and sighed.  
  
I sat down on my bed and the pain of the weeks events sunk in. My parents were dead, I made a fool of myself infront of my whole class basically, and I finally knew just WHO were the jerks to dump the paint on me and Sheena.  
  
I was so mad I could have strangled somebody..   
  
I heard a knock at my door.." who is it.." I say softly..  
" It's me Helga." came the voice that, at this point I most dreaded.   
" Arnold?" I whispered in horror.  
" Can I come in helga..please?" he continued.  
" Yeah yeah sure." I said and sat down on my bed.  
As he came in he looked around at my room. " What happened??"   
I sighed sadly. " A little breakdown I guess you could say." I muttered keeping my back turned to him.  
" Are you ok Helga? I mean what Rhonda said was really awful." he said concern plain in his Angelic voice..  
I looked up just as the other song started to play..  
  
@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@  
"No I would not sleep in this bed of lies  
So toss me out and turn in  
And there'll be no rest for these tired eyes  
I'm marking it down to learning  
I am.."  
@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@  
  
" Yeah Arnold..I--I'm fine." I said my voice wavering slightly.  
The air shifted slightly, " No your not." he said plainly.  
" Wha--what do you mean?" I asked  
" I know your not Ok, I also know what I heard..One you haven't called me Football head yet, and two, you said your parents died. You can't tell me you didn't care about them one bit." he said and I heard him take a few steps closer to my bed.  
  
@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@  
"Don't think that I can take another empty moment  
Don't think that I can fake another hollow smile  
It's not enough just to be sorry  
Don't think that I could take another talk about it"  
@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@  
  
I wasn't sure if I could take it anymore, I hadn't cried once since, the news..not once. I'd shoved my feelings aside. And I don't think I could take it another minute..  
" Your right Arnold.." I said my voice hardly above a whisper.   
" What?" he said shocked.  
" Your right, about everything, I do care about this, a whole lot. More than you know probably. But you know what. I haven't--cried once since they died, I don't need to cry. That's just weak!" I said clenching my fists to hold back to tears that were threatening to break through and tear down the last of my resolves.  
  
@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@  
"Just like me you got needs  
And they're only a whisper away  
And we softly surrender  
To these lives that we've tendered away"  
@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@  
  
" That's wrong to say Helga, you know it as well I do, it's not weak to show your pain. It takes a strong person to admit when they're hurting inside.. You know that I've always been here to listen, right? You understand that even though you..well were a bully that if you ever needed one I've had a shoulder for you to cry on. If you ever needed one.." he repeated..  
  
I wasn't going to be able to handle this much longer. I felt a few lone tears slip down my cheeks as I started to turn around to him..  
  
" You just don't understand Arnold." I snapped.  
  
@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@  
"No I would not sleep in this bed of lies  
So toss me out and turn in  
And there'll be no rest for these tired eyes  
I'm marking it down to learning  
I am  
  
Don't wanna be the one who turns the whole thing over  
Don't wanna be somewhere where I just don't belong  
Where it's not enough just be sorry"  
@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@  
  
He stepped backwards at the harshness in my voice. But I think he heard the pain.   
  
" NOBODY UNDERSTANDS!! Nobody knows just WHAT I went through in my life with Big Bob and Miriam, if it wasn't being yelled at for not being perfect it was trying to wake up my mother who was probably half drunk from smoothies cause she was unhappy with the choices she made in her own life. And now this, this fasade I put on, changing my attitude, my looks my style, and then finding out that just because I wasn't me. Everybody liked me. Why can't they just like me for who I am? I don't understand it. Sure I'm a bit cruel..ok very cruel. But so what that's who I am! " I shot up so quick that he had to jump back.  
  
But what he saw in my eyes wasn't anger, it was sincerity and pure angst. And he could tell that I was about to lose my resolve.  
  
@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@  
"Don't you know I feel the darkness closing in  
Tried to be more than me  
And I gave till it all went away  
And we've only surrendered  
To the worst part of these winters we've made  
  
No I would not sleep in this bed of lies  
So toss me out and turn in  
And there'll be no rest for these tired eyes  
I'm marking it down to learning  
I am.."  
@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@  
  
" I always liked you for who you were.." he said.  
  
I looked up.   
  
" I knew the bully side of you was just a front for the anger you had towards your parents. But I also knew that there was a side to you, your real side that was kind and romantic, and very sweet. " he paused. " And nobody asked you to be somebody you weren't. To tell the truth I was fooled by it for no more than a second. I could tell you were unhappy. That you just didn't like it. I often wondered why you did the whole makeover thing, and just how long you could pull it off. " He looked down, smiling sheepishly.  
" And I found myself missing the Old Helga more and more as the week went on. I missed you calling me football head." he admited and my eyes went wide, he actually liked ME, the me who I was. The real me..  
  
That was all i could take. I fell to my knees and started to cry, softly at first, but then sobs wracked my body. Like I just couldn't stand the pressure of hiding my feelings.. muttering about how it was my fault my parents were dead, how I could have changed it...and what came next I never expected once in my life..  
  
@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@  
" I am all that I'll ever be  
When you - lay your hands  
Over me but don't go weak on me now  
I know that it's weak  
But God help me I need this"  
@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@  
  
He kneeled down next to me and pulled me into a hug. At first I didn't know what to think, but I just found myself crying, relentlessly. But the funniest part was, I could tell that somehow he knew I needed this.   
  
@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@  
"I will not sleep in this bed of lies  
So toss me out and turn in  
And there'll be no rest for these tired eyes  
I'm marking it down to learning  
I'm marking it down to learning  
'Cause I am"  
@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@  
  
For the next few minutes there was nothing but sobbing and soothing words to be heard. After a while I found myself calming down, I felt--different. Alive? No.. I felt--well i can't find the word for it exactally but whatever it was, I felt it.   
  
I was still sniffling but I layed my head on his shoulder for about a 10th of a second before looking up at him in embarresment.  
But what he said took away the embarresment. With that soft and reassuring voice I found so enchanting he added. " See, I told you, you always had a shoulder to cry on."   
  
And I started to giggle softly. And he started to laugh.   
I wiped my eyes and resented my next move, I slipped out of his comforting embrace. And stood up.   
  
" Thank you. " I said now keeping my eyes on my floor which now seemed awfully interesting.   
  
" Helga?" he said softly.  
  
" What?" I replied  
  
" You going to be ok?" he asked as he took another step towards me.  
I looked up hesitantly.. "Y--yeah I think so, now that I've actually let the fact t-that my parents are--well you know. Sink in, I think I'll be ok. I mean--I--well i don't know, how am I going to go back to school after that whole incident. They'll all laugh at me, I'll be humiliated." I said and turned around throwing my harms up then letting them fall to myself.  
  
" Listen to me Helga." he said a tad forcefully and it was all I could do. I turned around..   
  
" Don't listen to what the others say. Don't EVER do that, that's what started this whole thing. There's no need for it. I'm your friend right?" He stopped for my answer.  
  
I waited a second before answering slowly.. " R--right.."   
  
" And friends opinions count right?"   
  
" Right..what are you getting at?" I asked..  
  
" What I'm getting at is that no matter what you choose, remember this. When it comes to matters of the self. The only thing that matters to me is the truth." he said.  
  
Now I knew that he was wise beyond his years, WAY beyond his years..and to me what he said hit home. I understood it.. " So even if I went back to my pink dress and bow..you'd still like me?" I said  
  
Nodding he smiled. " Of course Helga. Remember when we were three? in pre-school..I told you i liked your bow?" he said and laughed a little..  
  
I couldn't help it and I did too. " Yeah."   
  
" Well I told the truth about you then and I'll tell the truth about you know, I like you better when you be yourself and like who you are, then dress up like a snob and hate yourself."   
  
I sighed. " You're right."   
  
He chuckled. " Hearing ' you're right' from you just sounds strange."  
  
I punched his arm laughingly and he shrugged. " I mean it."  
  
I smiled. I know my love..." I know Football head."  
  
He smiled back. " Welcome back Helga." And hugged me quickly before stepping back and looking around.  
  
I blushed visibly and then sighed nervously. " Well..ah.."  
  
" I think I'd better get going. I know it's about what 9:00 now? I told grandpa I'd be back by 9:30."   
  
" O-okay." I added and we walked downstairs.  
  
As he walked out the front door he paused. " Remember what I said   
  
Helga, and remember that I mean it." and with that he left.  
  
" I will.." I whispered and shut the door.  
@--{---- @--{---- @--{---- @--{---- @--{----   
End of chapter 5   
Wow, this took me..like FOREVER to get out! Well I think a few of you know WHY it took me so long..infact if I don't get on soon you'll have TWO fics to read by me.. this turned to be sort of a--song fic towards the end.. ^.^ hopefully I won't get horrible reviews because of it.. infact it really WASN'T a songfic, just kinda took on the mood..  
" Bed Of Lies " as well as " Mad Season " Are both from Matchbox 20 (( as if you couldn't tell what one of my fave groups is.. ^-~ ))  
Anywhoo..sorry Lauren, This chapter I just can't send to you, I've waited TOO long to get out, but I spell checked like the first 14 pages.. if that counts for anything.. (( did it at school hehe took a whole 45 minutes CRIMENY! No wonder you got frustrated hehe ))   
  
Well ok, I want to say, thank you for reading my fic, sorry for the long wait, I hope you enjoyed this chapter. And I hope nobody hates me for not getting them " Together " yet.. Infact this is going to take another turn hehe..well not for the worst but as you can see I seem to have madness to my ways. * sighs *   
  
Hopefully I won't get too many hate reviews..cause I know that Songfics aren't generally widely liked around the fic world, and I'm sorry bout that.. (( well if that's true you'll HATE my next fic.. which if it don't shape up will turn into a 2 parter..that IS NOT acceptable..hehe )) well now that I've babbled I'll let ya go.  
THANKS FOR STICKEN WITH ME PEOPLES!!!   
( one of Queen of Hearts BIGGEST FANS ) and a very hopeful person..   
Kathy M. Kidman aka Sol-chan, aka Becca.  
@---:-----  
  
PPS: it DIDN'T come through yet..not even close..so it'll be later tonight tomorrow...sorry guys! 


	6. part 1: "The Plan"

And what if I said I loved you?  
  
Chapter 6 Part 1: the Plan.  
  
By: Kathy M. Kidman  
  
Disclaimer: ----- Insert whatever you want here..though the poems are mine, heh all mine.  
  
AN: So now I got myself 2 little projects going on huh? ^.^ Of course this one is basically my top Priority because well I'm so into this one, and when even "I" can't wait to see what happens either I'm getting too much into my own stories or my fics aren't as horrid as I thought they were...oh lol.  
  
Well atfirst I was going to keep Helga in her new look. But like Arnold said, I liked her better the way she was. Though I think that to Arnold the mystery that surrounds her is starting to fade, though he's still a bit TOO dense..but I don't know, not too sure what'll happen this chapter, even I'M in the dark here. So well thanks for sticken by me and that's all.  
  
PS: QOH come on gurl! get that story up up up!! * giggles * and keep up the oustanding work. (( you've got yourself a devoted fan over here hehe ))  
~@~ ~@~ ~@~ ~@~ ~@~ ~@~ ~@~ ~@~   
Arnolds POV  
  
When I got home that night I had to do my homework, my mind replayed the whole nights events like a loud slide-show.  
  
* knock knock * " can I come in short man?" came grandpa  
  
Sighing I clicked my computer off " Sure grandpa, you can come in."  
  
He opened the door and peeked in.  
  
" Just thought I'd bring you up a little bed time snack." and he set the tray down on the table next to my bed.  
  
" No thanks grandpa.." I said glumly.  
  
" Uh oh, did the party not go too well?"  
  
" It's not that."  
  
" Oh..are you having another of your illumated problems that just doesn't seem to have an answer?"  
  
I looked at him for a second.." well sort of..see umm--a friend of mine, her parents were--I guess killed sometime in the last week or so ago. But nobody knew..and well she seems to not be taking it too well. " I said thinking of our last ' conversation '  
  
" Which friend?" he inquired.  
  
" Helga Pataki.." I said hesitantly.  
  
He made an over active gasp. " the girl with the pigtails and unibrow that's always picking on you?"  
  
I nodded..grandpa was the only person I knew who could blow just about anything out of proportion. " yea, that's her.."  
  
" You mean Big Jerk Pataki's Kicked the bucket?!" he let out a cackle but at my stare stopped. " Sorry shortman, so Helga's parents are dead huh?..I reckon she wouldn't be taken it too well..after all her parents are dead.." he paused..  
  
" I know--but still..Is there anything I can do to like cheer her up, cause she finally let out her feelings about it tonight. And well, I have a feeling she's going to let it set for a while.." I said slowly.  
  
" Well..really all I think of is just to be there for her and let her know she has somebody there who cares for her.." suddenly his stomache rumbled.. " now if you'll excuse me, I some work to do in the office.." and he ran to the door but stopped.." and remember Arnold.."  
  
" I know grandpa, never eat rasberries.." I said smirking..  
  
" That's true, but still, right now all she needs is a friend..so make sure she understands that.." he cackled and ran downstairs..only to stop and look up at the door.. " I'm such a whily old coot.." and went to the office..  
  
I sighed as he left the room, thinking about what he said.  
  
" Just show her she has someone who cares for her.." I repeated softly to myself before getting ready for bed. After eyeing the cookies and milk I chewed on a few then fell fast asleep.  
  
Tomorrow was a new day, hopefully it would be better than today.  
*********************************************************  
Phoebes POV  
  
After the fight between Helga and Rhonda I wasn't too sure what to do.. I mean quite a few of the kids left after the event, and those who stayed were rather nervous.  
  
Gerald and I basically stayed away from Rhonda and Ashely for the rest of the night.  
  
Once 9:30 rolled around we left, muttering fairwells to a rather snotty Rhonda and heading home.  
  
We walked in silence till we reached my house, then he spoke up. " So, tomorrow's spose to be nice, wanna go to the park or something?" he asked.  
  
I giggled at his attitude and smiled thoughtfully. " Well Gerald, I would love to, though could we make it for a little later on in the afternoon..I really should go visit Helga for a while. If she'll even let me in that is.." I tariled off.  
  
" That's cool phoebes..good idea too. Tell her I said I'm sorry, would ya?"   
  
" I will.." I blushed and after a minute of tense silence he kissed me on the cheek and well, I smiled and went inside.  
  
" Chi chi-san, Ha ha-san, Ya." ( Father, Mother Hello..or hi mom and dad..) I greeted softly to my parents in the living room as I headed upstairs.  
  
Picking up the phone I dialed Helga's number.  
  
" Hello?" answered an older females voice, that had to be Vicki..  
  
" Um..hello is Helga there?" I asked.  
  
" Well she is but I don't think she's in the mood to talk now, maybe you could call back tomorrow---"  
  
" Phoebe." I filled in.  
  
" yes, I'll tell her you called ok?"  
  
" Alright", and just before I hung up she stopped me.  
  
" Wait! phoebe, Helga came back rather upset a while ago.." she paused and muttered softly. " took her a good hour or so to calm down.. do you know what happened at the party?"  
  
I sighed. " I'm afraid I do.." and I explained to her the events in which lead up to Helga's emotional departure from the party and apparent arrival at her own residence.  
  
She sighed deeply. " I see, well I'll try to get her to talk to me about it. thank you phoebe, I'll her you said Hello."  
  
" Domo Arigato..I mean thank you very much.." and with that I hung up and went to bed.  
*********************************************************  
Helga's POV ( strangely enough I'm also up last..and this is happening at the same time for me..so heh, it's a strange thing..)  
  
I spent a few hours after Arnold left cleaning up my room and listening to music..  
  
" if you wanna be somebody else..change your mind..ooh yea..oooh yea.."   
  
I sighed as I stuffed some of the clothes and stuff back into my dresser and then by 12:41 was ready for bed and I opened my journal.  
  
' Dear Journal.. ( 5-12-01 )   
  
It's me again, been a while, well ALOT has happened since I last wrote. My parents are well..dead. I went through a small identity crisis this week, but. * I paused in my writing and a small smile forced it's way upon my face * thanks to a very dear friend I'm back. Though I don't know if I'll be able to go to school on Monday, I may actually take Phoebes up on taking the day off. I feel like, majorly mentally tired. Well it's 12:45 now and ATC ' around the world' is on. so well I'd better turn in. Tomorrow's a new day, maybe it'll be better than today..Goodnight'  
  
And with that I clicked off my light and fell asleep.  
~@~ ~@~ ~@~ ~@~ ~@~ ~@~ ~@~ ~@~ ~@~   
( Note: it's really 12:46 PM. ATC really is on and it's well..technically speaking 5-13-01 but you get my drift...night guys! )  
~@~ ~@~ ~@~ ~@~ ~@~ ~@~ ~@~ ~@~ ~@~  
  
I woke up the next morning with an eery sense of peace..  
  
" Helga? are you up yet?" Said Olga looking into my room.  
  
...' There goes the feeling of peace.' and I could feel my annoyance rising. " Yes OLGA I am! Crimeny!"  
  
" Good, cause I have some news for you, so get dressed and come downstairs kay?" and she took her chipper self downstairs.  
  
" More news!? " I exclaimed as I got out of bed and, for the first time since Monday, put on my usual outfit, but I hesitated for a minute and just fidgeted with the bow which for so long i'd warn..  
  
After a few minutes of silent consideration I put my hair back up into it's usual pigtails and looked myself over in the mirror.. Man it was good to be back.  
  
But then suddenly i thought about the "news" Olga had for me and my anger rose.  
  
" I'm only 9 years old! my parents are dead and people don't like me for who I am. CRIMENY!! what more could I possibly need to know?!" I bellowed as I stomped downstairs and into the kitchen, catching a glance at the clock. ' 9:20 '  
  
Vicki made a strange face at my enterance. " well good morning to you too Helga.."  
  
I stopped and went to sit down at the table. " what? What in Crimeny did I do now?" I bit out, you could just tell I was still in a bad mood from last night.  
  
Olga burst into the dining room carrying a plate of pancakes, I was the last one to eat breakfast. " We're going to Louisiana."   
  
" What?!" I asked in an attempts to sit down, only missing the seat. " oomph!"  
  
" Helga?" said Vicki peering over the table.  
  
" Oh dear.."  
  
I pulled myself back up and made it to my seat. " Louisiana?"   
  
" Yup, and we're going on Wednesday we'll be back by Saturday or Sunday." she paused a slightly sad look passing her face. " We're umm..going for the funeral for mummy and daddy.." she sniffled.  
  
I cringed at the news and sighed sadly. " Oh.." and as she put the plate infront of me I stood up. " Anything else I need to know before I go?"   
  
Vicki sighed as well.   
  
" what?." I said through gritted teeth.  
  
" I--well I've got to go back to College tonight, and after the weekand So does Olga...but your Uncle'll be here so you'll have somebody to look after you till school's out. Then you can come down to Wellington University or stay with my sister and parents for the summer.." she stopped as soon as I turned around and started for the door.  
  
" Helga? what's the matter hun?"   
  
" I'm NOT hungry! I'm going out ok? I'll be back---whenever.." my voice came out sad but harsh.   
  
And with that I walked out the door slamming it and I walked down the sidewalk. I just wanted to be alone..  
  
As I turned the corner I crashed into somebody, then caught site of who it was.. " Arnold?!" but then I shook my head.. " I mean, watch where you going football head!"   
  
Boy..either I was going def or that sounded more lonely than mean.  
  
He shook his head. " Sorry Helga." and he helped me up. " So, umm how are you---" he paused.  
  
" what?" I said a strange look passing my eyes.  
  
" Welcome back Helga." was all he said.  
  
" I--ah--thanks?" boy that shocked me.  
  
As he looked at me he looked lost in thought.  
  
" Arnold??" silence.  
  
" Hey Arnold!! Earth to Football head!" I waved my hand infront of him and he snapped out of his trance.  
  
" Oh, sorry Helga."  
  
What was up with that boy..I don't know but after another few seconds I found myself with that peaceful feeling. Maybe it was being around Arnold, the one whom my life revolves around. I just don't know.  
*********************************************************  
Arnold's POV  
  
I felt a shift in the air and found Helga with a peaceful smile on her face. She was rather pretty when she smiled. I guess it was her turn to get lost in thought.  
  
" Helga?" I said once.. " Helga?!"  
  
" Huh?" she snapped out of her tranquil trance and looked at me.  
  
" I was just wondering, how you were holding up and all, I mean after that fight and all, yelling about your parents hating you and stuff.." I trailed off..  
  
Her face turned sad once again and I could have kicked myself. ' You're spose to be there to cheer her up not make her sad!'  
  
" Helga? What's the matter?" I asked as she fell back against the wall of the Building.  
  
" The funerals either Thursday or Friday.." she whispered, her voice wavering and I could tell it was a struggle to keep up her strong resolve.  
  
Noticing we werne't too far from the dock's I helped her up. " Come on." and we walked in timid silence for 10 minutes.  
  
Once there she got a questioning expression.  
  
" You only seem to open up to me when we're alone, well the docks are practically deserted on a Sunday morning. So we're alone, now tell me what's wrong." I said as i sat down at the edge of the dock.  
  
She stood there for a minute, a bewildered look in her eyes.  
  
But soon after she followed me and, though still standing looked around nervously. Speaking softly she said. " Umm--see.." she sighed. " The funerals this week."  
  
" I know, you told me already." I said looking up from my stare on Elk Island to see her looking over the side of the dock.   
  
" Look don't make this any harder for me football head." she shot out and I sighed.   
  
" Sorry, so where is it?"   
  
" Louisiana, mom's home state..we'd leave Wednedsday, and come back Saturday or Sunday. I just don't--know.." she paused and looked up.  
  
" What's wrong Helga? don't you want to go?..say goodbye? You know, for closure?" I said standing up and starting towards her.  
  
As if by reflex she backed up a step. " It's not that." she looked away and clenched her fists. " Oh, what am I talked to you for, you have and always will have people who like you, care for you. You--ugh, you wouldn't understand!" she cried and ran from the docks, leaving me stunned and rather concerned.  
  
" There's something wrong that she's not telling.." ' just make her understand she has somebody who cares for her..' the quote kept repeating itself.  
  
" Well so far she thinks nobody cares for her..so that's what grandpa meant. Ugh! I should talk to Phoebe, maybe she'd understand the situation better. " I took off from the docks as well, hope renewed, and will stronger than ever to prove to Helga that she is cared for.  
*********************************************************  
Helga's POV  
  
As I ran I really didn't care where I went at the time, or for that matter who or what I ran into.  
  
What was wrong with that football head, what was he trying to do? get all cozy?! and why the heck am I always so darn--chicken and nervous around him.  
  
I slowed down to a walk after a while and pulled out my locket and sighed lovingly. Then i walked into a phone poll.. " ommph." * thud *  
  
Rubbing my head I got up and put the locket away. " Man, love hurts.." I mumbled and continued to walk.  
********************************************************  
Phoebe's POV  
  
I had woken up rather late that sunday morning. 9:30.  
  
I ate breakfast with mom and dad then started to read my book again. ' A Tale of Two Cities ' but after two chapters the doorbell rang.  
  
" I got it!" I called out and ran to the door  
  
Upon opening it I found Arnold struggling to catch his breath.  
  
" Arnold? what's the matter?"  
  
He held up a finger to signal he needed a minute.  
  
So I helped him in and to the living room  
  
" Thanks.." he said once he finally could breath straight.  
  
" Whatever were you in such a hurry to get to my house for Arnold?, is something the matter? an accident perhaps?" I asked  
  
Shaking his head he replied. " We have to help out Helga."  
  
My eyebrows wrose in shock. He ran all the way here to help a surely forlorn Helga?  
  
" What do you mean? because now that Helga's announced it publically that her parents are deceased and that apparently she believes in that emotionally challenged mind of hers that it's her fault her parents where killed. So now her self asteem has fallen so low that you are concerned for her?" I asked.  
  
He stared at me for a second before blinking. " well that's sort of it--but umm..she doesn't think anybody cares about her. She thinks she's alone in the world, and that's basically the tip of the iceberg. I can tell, and you see, usually as of late I could get her to open up to me, but today she just--I don't know, put up her usual sheild and ran off. She's so nervous around me. I just don't understand it Phoebe, what's up with that girl? Will I ever be able to understand her?"  
  
I got a strange expression in my eyes. So Helga's been warming up to him huh? I wonder what's really the matter.. " Arnold, don't even TRY to understand her, she's a complicated child..but I propose we go and find her, or wait, I have a plan.."  
  
First I made him tell me everything that happened this morning. He told me about the funeral and I suddenly got an idea. but I'd have to talk it over with Simmons, my parents and Arnolds Grandparents.  
  
" Come on Arnold, we have a busy day ahead of us.." and I dragged him off.  
*********************************************************  
Arnold's POV  
  
" Phoebe, where are we going?" I asked.  
  
" We have to go visit Mr. Simmons." she said.  
  
" WHAT?! On a SUNDAY!"  
  
She giggled. " don't worry, it isn't for school--well sort of. But it's really important.  
  
I only sighed as we ran down the sidewalk.  
~@~ ~@~ ~@~ ~@~ ~@~ ~@~ ~@~ ~@~ ~@~   
When we finally arrived and knocked on the door Mr. Simmons answered right away.  
  
" Wha--Arnold, Phoebe, two of very ' special ' students, what brings you here?" he asked and ushered us inside.  
  
" I had that same question.." I muttered and phoebe looked at me.  
  
" YOu see Mr Simmons, we have some unfortunate news.." she started.  
  
" Unfortunate news?? oh my, whatever could it be?" he gasped. " Did one of your ' special ' projects get messed up?"  
  
Only a teacher would think messed up homework was Unfortunate.  
  
" No Mr. Simmons, it's a big more tragic."  
  
" Oh, well then, tell me, is there anything I can do?"  
  
Nodding Phoebe continued. " I'm glad you asked than, and yes sir there is something..see Helga's parents were in an accident in Louisiana--"  
  
" An accident..are they ok?"  
  
" No they aren't sir. They're dead." she said blatently  
  
His face paled slightly. " Oh..dear, and how is Helga holding up?"  
  
This time I spoke up, but not telling too much. " Not too good Mr. Simmons, I'm not too sure if she'll be in school tomorrow either."   
  
" Is that why you came here? to perhaps get homework, or something for Helga?" he asked.  
  
" No Mr. Simmons, see she goes to Louisiana for the funeral on Wednesday, and well, I was wondering if Arnold and I could perhaps go with her for moral support. " she said and we both looked at her.  
  
" So THAT'S what you wouldn't tell me." I exclaimed.  
  
" Well, I think that's just wonderful you two, so thoughtful. such a ' special idea'!" he exclaimed.  
  
I sighed and Phoebe smiled happily.   
  
" I think, that would be a very thoughtful and ' special ' idea. " he said smiling.  
  
I looked between them. " ok, I'm glad we got permission, but WHY did we have to ask Mr. Simmons?" I stopped. " No offense.."   
  
" None taken Arnold.." he smiled.  
  
Sighing I turned to Phoebe again. " So now what?"  
  
" well..." she started and turned to Mr. Simmons.." We'll get back to you with details tomorrow alright Mr. Simmons."  
  
" Ok.."   
  
" Then, Arnold, I'll go talk to my family and you go talk to your family ok?" as we both stood up we waved to Simmons..  
  
" See you tomorrow children."  
  
" Byee.." and we went our separate ways.  
  
" CALL ME WHEN YOU FIND OUT!!" she yelled from down the street.  
  
" I will!" I shouted back and took off down the sidewalk towards my own place.  
  
Mr. Simmons watched the both of us leave and, smiling, walked back inside his own house.  
  
When i finally got home I burst into the boarding house and right into grandpa who was yelling at Mr. Kokoshka for being a jerk and a cheater.   
" You big lying cheating oa---why the rush shortman?" he asked.  
  
" Gotta talk to you grandpa." I said   
  
" Oh?" he raised an eyebrow.  
  
" Yeah.." I said getting my 2nd wind and dragging him into the living room.  
  
Sighing I looked around, I wasn't all too sure how keen he'd be to the question.   
" Well..this was all Phoebe's idea, and we still have to get permission before I actually go along with it but--um.." I paused.  
  
He looked at me. " Well come on shortman, out with it, I'm not gettin any younger here."   
  
Grandma stuck her head in from the kitchen. " That's for sure.."  
  
" POOKIE!"   
  
She went back to cleaning, with an evil laugh.  
  
I sighed. " Ok, see we were wondering if since the funeral for Helga's parents is this week in Louisiana, if we could maybe go with her for moral support or something. You know, make her see that she has somebody who cares for her and all." I stopped.  
  
He looked at me for a second before smiling and saying.." is that all?"   
  
I started to reply but then stopped. "---wha? what do you mean is that all? yeah I guess so.."  
  
He grinned. " Well of course you can Shortman. Not like I'd say no or anything, just as long as you have permission from Helga's family, and the teacher and all that old stuff..." he waved his hands standing up. " I don't see any problems with it." he stopped and smiled to himself. " Well..seeya 'round shortman, dinners at 7, watch out, it's pookies famous chili.." and he sauntered out of the room.  
  
I grinned and then ran to the telephone to call Phoebe, wonder if she had the same luck as me..  
*********************************************************  
Phoebe's POV  
  
When i got home, I found myself a little anxious about asking my parents to go with Helga. But I knew it was for a good reason so of course I asked..  
  
" Mother, father..I have a question for you." I started softly..  
  
They both looked up from their book or paper to greet me. " Yes Phoebe? what is it?" my mother asked.  
  
I stood there for a second a nervous expression on my face..   
  
Ok, out with it Phoebe! get yourself a backbone! I mentally chided. " I'm not to sure if you're aware of everything going on, but He'ga parents were killed in a car accident last week. And Helga's taking it rather harshly. The funerals late this week, and I was just wondering if I as well as Arnold, who's getting permission as we speak, could perhaps go with her to Lousiana, for moral support. Help her pull through her hard time." I stopped.  
  
They exchanged glances, then my father sighed and set his paper down. " Have you spoken to your teacher about this?" was his first question.  
  
Nodding I stated pulling up to my full height *don't laugh at me*  
" Yes, as soon as Arnold came over this morning in a hurry, apparently concerned for a rather anguished Helga, I got the idea and we went to go talk to Mr. Simmons, he thinks it's a wonderful idea, and basically gave us his blessings, but we are going to finalize the details tomorrow or Tuesday."  
  
This time it was my mothers turn. " Phoebe, sweetie, does her sister know about this?" came her small drawl.  
  
I about answered yes and then mentally sighed. Darn, stopped dead in my tracks. " No..." then sighed outwardly. " would you like me to ask her? Maybe figure out exact details coorilating with our endeavor?"   
  
They both nodded. " Yes, and if your teacher, Olga, and Arnolds family all agree then---well who are we to say no." said my mother standing up smiling and walking over to me. I gave her a hug and grinned. " Thank you! so much mother!" " It's a very thoughtful and kind idea, and I'm sure Helga will love it."  
  
I bowed and started out the room. " Domo Arigato mother, father.." and as I got out of the room the phone rang.  
  
" I'll get it!" and I hurried to the phone. " Hello?"  
  
It was Arnold. " Arnold! did you get permission?" I asked  
  
" Yeah!" he said with as much enthusiasm as me.  
  
" That's perfect, I almost do, all we have to do is talk to Olga first before I get permission, but I'm pretty sure I get a yes." I said and smiled to myself.  
  
" That's great, we should go over to Helga's now--maybe she's not home yet and we can keep it a surprise." he said his voice getting a strange tone.   
  
I could tell that he DID have feelings for Helga, he was just repressing them.  
  
" Well, should I come over to your house? or should we meet at hers?" he asked.  
  
" We'll meet there. Ok? see you there!" and we both hung up.  
  
" Mom, dad! I'm going to go confirm everything with Olga! Ja Ne!" and I ran out the door.  
********************************************************  
Helga's POV  
  
Well, while they were doing that I was upstairs in my room thinking. I wasn't in a good mood, so no inspiration hit me for poetry.  
  
I had dozed off but about 20 minutes later I woke up, to hear voices downstairs.  
  
I snuck to the stairwell to hear both Phoebe and Arnold, AND Olga chatting.  
  
" Yes Phoebe, definatly. My answer is yes, I'm just so excited! she'll just be so thrilled. " I heard Olga exclaim.  
  
" Well thanks very much Olga..we'll talk to you tomorrow or something to confirm everything, just remember DON'T tell Helga. Ok? It's supposed to be a surprise." said Arnold and when I heard his voice, his angelic voice, I about fainted. But stopped myself.  
  
" Ok you two...ta ta.."   
  
" Bye.." they both said at once and walked out the door.  
  
And when they did that, I ran to my room quickly and looked out the window.  
  
" Now remember Phoebe, don't tell Helga anything about this, it's our little secret ok? I'll go home cause well. I have some homework to do.. and you go tell your parents that's the plans affirmative.."  
  
" Alright Arnold, I will.." and they both went their separate ways.  
  
As I shut my window I sat back against my bed and sighed.  
" What could they be up to that's supposed to be a surprise for me?" I thought aloud.  
  
It was almost noon so I decided to go downstairs for lunch, wondering if I should call Phoebe to talk, or go investigating to see what they were planning.  
  
Well after a sandwhich and soup, and a rather smily Olga, the curiosity got to me. " Olga, I'm going out for a while ok? I'll be back by oh say.. 5:00 ok?"   
  
She got a surprised look on her face. " Well, alright Helga, but by the time you get here, your uncle'll be here as well.." she said..  
  
" Yeah sure fine, fine, just remember, nobody goes in my room got it?" I shot.  
  
She nodded. " Gotcha little sis."   
  
" Yeah yeah.." and I stomped out the door, then stopped.  
  
Who should I go investigate first? Phoebe's or Arnold?  
  
Well I'll figure it out on the way. Whatever they have planning, they can't keep hidden from Helga G. Pataki for long!  
*********************************************************  
  
Stay tuned for Chapter 6 Part two: "The Plan" commences  
  
Coming soon, to a website near you.. 


	7. Chapter 6p2 "The Plan" Commence, secrets...

And What if I said I loved you  
  
Chapter 6 part 2: "The Plan" commences, secrets to keep  
  
By: Kathy M Kidman  
  
Disclaimer: ..... HA=CB, need I say more?  
  
AN*updated*: it's now July 1st..I'm so so so sorry about the month long thing..I hit the worst writers block I ever had..I slowly trudged along..and slowly it came out. It won't be much longer than 12 or 13 pages tho..but chapter 7 will be a major make up ok? anything could happen..please any of my fans that are still out there..please give me another chance...  
@}----- @}----- @}----- @}----- @}-----  
  
Helga's POV (Continued)  
  
I decided to go to Phoebe's house. No doubt she'd either slip up. Or atleast be talking to her family about it.  
  
So, as I ran through the streets I finally got to her house, now this wasn't going to be easy. I couldn't just waltz up and ask her to tell me about it, cause after all it's supposed to be a "surprise".  
  
So I snuck around the side of the house. And then found an open window. " Perfect, note to self, thank Mrs. Hyerdahl for leaving her window open. " I said and climbed up the fire escape. Slipping on a Mr. Fudgie wrapper and almost falling down.   
  
I gasped as I heard somebody opening the window. So I jumped down from the fire escape.  
  
" Is somebody out there da'lin?" I heard Mrs. Hyerdahl call.  
  
" No mother, nothings out here.." Phoebe called back and went inside..  
  
Growling I climbed out of my hiding spot. " That was too darn close for my taste.." then I pulled a banana peel off my head and sighed.  
  
" That's the 3rd time this WEEK I've had to hide in a dumpster to keep from being spotted."   
  
And I continued my original plan, the theme from mission: impossible, showing it's way into my head.  
  
This time, thankfully, I made it saftely up the fire escape. After making sure nobody was in the room I climbed in, and fell onto the bed. " oomph.." * thud *  
  
This wasn't going to be easy was it..   
  
I rolled over with a sigh of relief, only to fall off the bed.  
  
"oww! crimeny!!" I exclaimed then got up.   
  
Only to dive under the bed when somebody (namely Mrs. Hyerdahl) wandered in.  
  
"Now, where is my watch.." she said to herself.  
  
I look infront of me just as a hand peers down and picks up a golden watch.  
  
"eh!!" I gasped and she called out "Found my watch dear..I'll be right down." and she sauntered out of the room.  
  
I stayed there in baited breath for a good 2 minutes, till I heard the fromt door downstairs slam. " Good.." I muttered and crawled out and brushed my dress off.  
  
"Now, would phoebe's be in her room..or downstairs?" I thought aloud then heard phoebe's door start to open.  
  
I look both ways nervously before diving into a closet.   
' of course they'd have to make this hard on me..Did Nancy Drew ever have this much trouble?' I asked myself silently.  
  
I heard Phoebe humming to herself as she walked passed the closet and downstairs.  
  
And once sure I snuck downstairs, and waited, she picked up a book, started reading the gasped. " Oh, I almost forgot!" and she ran to the phone, causing me to run back up the stairs and hide..  
  
She waited for a second before smiling. " Arnold hi.."   
  
At that I gasped "Arnold?" and tried to listen in but lost my balance and stumbled backwards into the open closet, causing stuff to fall.."Crud!" I muttered and as fast as I could stuffed everything back in the closet and ran to Mr. and Mrs. Hyerdahls' room and jumped out the window and..got down the fire escape and ran as fast as I could from the house..Luckily I was fast enough, otherwise phoebe would have caught me.  
~@~ ~@~ ~@~ ~@~ ~@~ ~@~ ~@~ ~@~  
Once I was sure I had no chances of being caught I sighed with relief and slid down the wall I was leaning against..  
"Well no information there..'sides I know I couldn't do that, Phoebe's my friend.." I muttered..this was going to be harder than I thought.   
  
Which meant I'd have to go to...*sighs dreamily* Arnolds house.. But, I'd have to be extra sneaky I mean he could be anywhere in that nut joint.  
  
This time I wouldn't get caught and I most definatly would figure out WHAT they were hiding from me..  
  
So I climped up that...familar fire escape and I peered in Arnolds window.. he wasn't there..so I quickly made it to the roof, and, once sure the room was STILL empty I opened up the window and climbed in, making sure not to make any noise..   
  
Geez, wasn't I here just a while ago, with permission?   
  
Strange..anyways. I looked around his room, everytime I was here I felt--*shakes head* well enough of that.. I looked around the room, for notes or anything..then I heard him talking on the phone downstairs..  
  
But why wasn't he using the one in his room? broken maybe?  
  
Oh well, so I made my way to the doorway and just caught the end of the conversation.   
  
"Yeah phoebe, so what was that noise?" he waited for a second.  
" You think somebody was in your house? but who.." he stopped and then said. " You don't suppose Helga would have---" he shook his head. "No nevermind..I'm just paranoid.." he sighed.  
" Oh well, just remember, we have to talk to Mr. Simmons tomorrow about this." he said and I smiled.  
  
So---Mr. Simmons is in on this too eh?..oops! he hung up the phone, gotta get outta here!!  
  
So I scrambled onto his bed and out of the window I'd left open..forgetting one little thing. To shut it after I'd left.  
**********************************************************************************  
Arnolds POV  
  
As I went back to my room to finish my math homework I noticed a draft in the room. Looking around confused I caught sighed of an open window, one which I know wasn't open when I left.  
  
But as I closed it, grandpa called me downstairs to run a few errands before supper.  
  
"Now, go get a gallon of milk, and the meat I ordered from Mr. Greens earlier today." and he handed me some money.  
  
Nodding I ran out of the house. "Gotcha grandpa, be back soon!"  
  
Well, just after I got out of Mr. Green's place I turned the corner to go to the store..which i could have done before, because it's closer to my place but oh well, and I collided with somebody, pretty hard. Apparently we'd both been running.  
  
"Ommph!" and we both fell over, the meat landed on the grass and I looked up to meet two very nervous, yet angry and familiar eyes..  
  
"Sorry Helga, guess I was in a hurry." I muttered and after this mornings events expected some kind of beration.  
  
But all she did was look at me with those confused and now freaked out eyes and she stammered out..  
" L--look, I was j--just going for a walk.. got a problem with that Football head?!" she finished snappily.  
  
I looked at her suspiciously and helped her up. "No, no problems with that Helga.." I muttered, and noticed she had come from direction of my house..  
  
She nodded huffily. "Good, now out of my way." and she stomped off..  
  
I looked after her with a confused look, she had mood swings worse than anybody else I knew, I was beginning to think I missed the new old helga..but that was just a passing thought..and I knew whatever it was that was bothering her, was really bothering her.  
  
But, there was something in her eyes, I just couldn't put my finger on it..something--different.  
  
"Oh! the milk! I almost forgot.." so I picked up the meat and headed for the store, then went home.  
  
When i got there I ran upstairs to call phoebe.  
  
"Phoebe--" I said when she answered.  
  
"Yes Arnold?" she asked.  
  
" Just ran into Helga, seems as if she's on the war path today.." I said confusion still plain in my voice.  
  
Shrugging to myself I said. " I don't know really, maybe she's still bitter from this morning or something." I paused and muttered under my breath. " ir maybe it's just towards me."   
  
Of course if there I would have seen her smile, yet raise one eyebrow. " I wouldn't worry about it Arnold, that's just Helga, it's how she deals with life."  
  
" Some way to deal.." I muttered remembering our latest encounter somewhat--cynically. " Anyways, just--watch what you say around her if she stops by today, though I'm sure she won't lash out at you." I said softly  
  
"What Arnold?" she asked  
  
" Oh! nothing phoebe, I've got to go. Talk to you later." and I hung up  
**********************************************************************************  
Phoebe's POV  
  
Great now both of them were lost. Helga--I wonder if she has even the faintest idea just how strong a hold she really has over him I mean she's a mystery-- to him and me even. But atleast I know why she's so brash around Arnold.  
  
Oh well, I'd have to file this for now, Gerald's coming over so I need to A) start packing and B) get ready.  
  
So I ran upstairs to get ready for a day out. Probably a good idea, rest my mind. Since I'm already ahead in school.  
  
About 20 minutes later Gerald knocked on the door, I left a note for my parents and went outside.  
  
"Hey Phoebe's." he greeted with his usual cool attitude and suave smile.  
  
"Hello Gerald.." I blushed slightly  
  
"So what do you want to do today?" he asked  
  
I'd done some out of school research and found a movie I thought would be rather interesting." Could we go see Cat's and Dogs?" I asked surprising him  
  
" Ya--you want to go see a movie?" he asked confused. To tell the truth he looked rather attractive like that---whoa whoa phoebe, you can't think like that--can you? I blushed.  
  
" Yes Gerald I would like to, It seems rather interesting, one will never know the true thoughts of the animal, but the cybernetics seem very real, and the psycological aspects--" I stopped.." sorry, yes I would Gerald..if that's alright with you.."  
  
He smiled and shook his head as we took eachothers hands and headed towards the theater..  
"of course.."  
******************************************************************************  
Helga's POV  
  
Heh, well while those two love birds went out I decided to give up on my search for a while, and go to the park. Just think for a while, I needed to. It always calms me down to walk, and right now I was a nervous reck.  
  
So as I walked down the trail I found myself calmer as I went further. So when i found myself by the lake I sat down and closed my eyes. Apparently dosing off into thought.  
  
After a few minutes of much needed silence a voice broke through my thoughts.  
  
"Helga,..Helga? you there little sis? wakey wakey.." came an all to familiar, sickeninglyu sweet voice.  
  
"What?" I opened my eyes to find a dusking sky. "What the crimeny, the sun doesn't set at 4:00 in the afternoon!" I exclaimed  
  
Olga giggled. "Well of course not silly. It's 7:49 sister, that's why I'm here. To get you home for dinner. "  
  
My jaw dropped. " almost 8?? wow!!"   
  
She nodded. " Yup..now upity up."  
  
I followed her home almost automatically, thinking " man, so much for continuing the investigation tonight..tomorrow simmons.. heh heh..'  
  
I was most definatly going to be in school tomorrow, dead parents or not..  
  
When we got home there was a black corvette sitting in the driveway and the sillouette of a man in the living room.." who's that?" I asked..  
  
"It's your uncle..he'll be taking care of you after the Funeral when I go back to college.." added Olga.  
  
I sighed and nodded. " oh..alright." so we were introduced and at dinner he told me about himself and what he does, and of course how sorry he was to see his big brother gone, blah blah blah..he wasn't bad, but I didn't like him..  
  
So when dinner was finished, I softly excused myself and went to my room, plopped down on my bed and thought till 10:14, at which time i got ready for bed and fell asleep.  
  
But boy I wouldn't be prepared for what came that next day..  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
Tomorrow morning found me very nervous about going to school..  
  
But, hey! I'm Helga G. Pataki nothing keeps me down--for long.  
  
So, with as much confidence as and fake happiness as I could muster I got out of my uncles car (considering Olga was gone to work) and started up the stairs to school..  
  
My first real mistake was not pushing down any 3rd graders or losers in my way.  
  
But, my 2nd and biggest mistake was about to happen..  
  
*Thud* After yet another collision I looked up almost lifelessly to see whom I'd pumled over. (though after 6 years of this..I should know..) and found Arnold gathering his books and grabbing my backpak. Now normally this would be the part where I snatch my stuff away from him and yell at him. But did I? Nooo--- I had to crumble on the inside and cover that up on the outside.   
  
Apparently he noticed it. Why! why can't I for once hide something..not a word from any of you.  
  
"Is something wrong Helga?" he asked as we started walking to class...him still carrying my books. Gerald still standing back where we collided dumbfounded.  
  
" No..Nothings wrong Arnold." I said softly.  
  
" Your lying." he said statedly.  
  
I looked up to him with half hazardous eyes. " So now you know when I'm lying, you know me just like a book..am I that easy to read? or are you just a genius?" I snapped.  
  
At his look I froze. Eyes wide and jaw slightly ajar..I closed my eyes and shook my head slightly at first then vigirously afterwards. " I didn't mean that." I said trying mostly to convince myself..I never meant anything I said to him that was mean.. I never wanted to hurt him. But that look, that surprised and hurt look. I could have just slapped myself. " I never mean it.." I muttered then stopped. "Look I'm sorry Arnold, sorry for saying anything.." thankfully we were near enough to the classroom so I could pull this off. "Thanks alot for carrying my bakpak, I really appreciate it..Yeah..Bye." and I snatched my stuff from him and ran into class.  
  
Hopefully nobody else saw that. I couldn't show any weakness..well then what in crimeny was that?! Pataki you're losing your edge!   
  
Sitting down at my desk I felt a few stares on me. Keeping my stare on my desk I suddenly felt paranoid..very paranoid..what were they looking at anyways?? Did I have "Pity me, pity me! my parents are dead!" written on me anywhere? Crimeny! I looked up, and suddenly everybody was busy with something else..  
  
I scowled slightly, but didn't even mean that.   
  
This was NOT going to be a good day, I could tell right then and there..  
**********************************************************************************  
Arnolds POV  
  
What the heck was that all about? she acted..very very strangely..  
  
I turned around to Gerald who had a confused look in his eyes.  
  
" WHat was that about man?" he asked walking up and looking at the class room door, where helga had dissapeared to.  
  
I shrugged. "Beats me..Helga's one complicated girl." I said as we started to class  
  
"If you ask me, she's just wierd, plain an' simple man man.." he added  
  
"Gerald!" I chided, and he grinned and shrugged  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
Upon walking into the classroom I noted Helga with a very perturbed look in her eyes and the other kids a little---over busy.  
  
"Now what did we miss?" whispered Gerald.  
  
I shrugged "beats me.." and we took our seats just as Mr. Simmons walked in.  
  
"Good morning class--" then he saw Helga in her seat. "Oh, hello Helga, and how are we feeling this morning.." he asked somewhat cheerfully.  
  
She replied with a slight edge in her voice, but that sounded hollow. "Oh, I'm fine Mr. Simmons, but if the others don't STOP staring at me when I'm not looking I'll beat every one of them up!" she snapped.  
  
Mr. Simmons nodded slowly, gulped and turned around to grab his notes. "Umm...well now--" and he went on to talk about certain subjects.  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
Over time I watched Helga now and then, she seeemed---different. Oh sure she mean't her hostilities, but as the day progressed, and as more and more kids showed their sympathy, I noticed she became even more withdrawn. She'd accept sympathy cards from some kids, Mr. Simmons payed special attention to her. And she accepted it, most of the time..  
  
By the time lunch and recess rolled around, if you caught her by herself, she would look near tears.  
  
And Rhonda..on rhonda! she was, to say the least peeved. After the way she treated Helga at her party, it's less likely she'll ever throw another again. Her popularity she should regain, but for now?---eh just stay out of her war path.  
  
Now, don't think I forgot about "the plan" infact at recess Phoebe and I started towards Mr. Simmons room. When we got there he was reading a book and eating his usual lunch.  
  
"Mr. Simmons?" he said in unison  
  
"Huh?" he put down the book and looked up. "Oh! Arnold, Phoebe, please come in, come in-" he waved us in.  
  
"So kids..have we got a plan??"   
*******************************************************************************  
Helga's POV  
  
I had been moping down the hallway when I faintly heard from Mr. Simmons room "So kids, have we got a plan?" I gasped. "The plan!!" and started back around the corner I just passed, and thanks to that stupid water fountain and the leak I slipped and fell. "Ohh..my head.."   
  
The nurse walked by and saw this. "Helga? You ok?" and she helped me up. "Let's go get you an asprin." she said leading me to the nurses office, and I was too dazed to protest.  
*******************************************************************************  
Phoebe's POV  
  
At the time we heard a crash outside the door we were discussing with Mr. Simmons the simple idea of our plan.  
  
" Now, really all we plan to do is, contain the secret from Helga until the day of the coming departure, arrive at the airport ahead of time in order to take a plane that leaves precisely 1 hour before the one Olga and Helga should be on.. why? might you ask, wouldn't they be on the earlier plane? that's what we agree'd on. we whould surprise Helga at her grandparents house." I said  
  
Mr. Simmons looked at me.  
  
"Well..we got permission." I said blushing slightly.  
  
He smiled. "you know I'm very proud of the two of you, doing something like this for Helga in her hour of despair."   
  
and we exchanged happy glances.  
*******************************************************************************  
Helga's POV  
  
I walked down the hallway, well ran down the hallway towards Mr. Simmons' room. I had to know what this "Plan" was..  
  
but by the time I got there all I heard was "You know, I'm very proud of the two of you, doing something like this for Helga in her hour of despair."   
  
"WHAT?!" I growled only to clamp my hands over my mouth and look around before darting down the hallway and out into the playground.  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
Once I got there I feel back against one of the benches on the side of the building to catch my breath.  
Man if they ever found out I'd been spying on them I'd be dead, no matter if my parents were already there..  
  
I looked around at the kids playing, a four square game going in one corner between Nadine, Sheena, Ashely Aden, and Lidnsey..  
  
A kickball game between some other kids. The usual stuff.. I saw some kids look over at me, smile a little then turn back to their game, or whatever they were doing.  
  
I sighed sadly. This was the worst day of my life. Even worse than back in 3rd grade when while onstage for a play curly ran into me and knocked me into Arnold and we both fell off the stage..it was amazing they forgot about that.  
  
Sighing I closed my eyes. This just wasn't going to go how I wanted it to was it?  
*******************************************************************************  
Arnolds POV  
  
After that crash, and other noise, I noticed Helga acting a little wierd.. well..different from earlier, she didn't accept sympathy, she shut everybody out. And even Mr. Simmons got the jist and stayed out of her way.  
  
After everybody went home, Phoebe and I cemented our plans, and we started home..  
  
Once I got home I had grandpa get two tickets, for the first flight out wednesday morning. While Helga and Olga would go at the 4:30 one in the afternoon.  
  
"All set shortman." grandpa told me before I ran up to my room, and called first Gerald to tell him I'd be missing a few games, and then Phoebe to tell her to get ready, we left wednesday at 8:30.  
  
After that, the day went very quiet. Helga was no where to be seen at the game, and when I called her either she answered with a quick and short hi, then bye, or Olga answered and said that Helga "Didn't wish to be bothered" I got really worried...  
  
"Shortman!! Dinner!" called my grandpa  
  
But I couldn't eat much, and when Mr. Kokoshka tried to take my food Grandpa yelled at him, and that's when I took my chance to sneak out of the house, and started for a walk.   
  
I later found myself in the park, it was almost sunset and the color that the sun was casting on the trees and lake was just so calming..took my mind off my worries for a while..and trust me, it was something I needed I was just so confused.  
*******************************************************************************  
Helga's POV  
  
As the day wore into evening I found myself even more depressed than the hour before..I didn't understand it. I mean, I should be happy this is all happening. No more drunk mirium, no more angry bob..no more "olga is all this.." or "why can't you be more like your sister"..no more chance yet fun moments.  
  
I was a walking contradiction at the moment. "I'm going out" I called out, not caring who heard me.  
  
My mind said to be happy, and glad that my torture was all over. But my heart said it was time to morn, to actually let it sink in that they were gone, that any chance of a relationship was gone between us. It was just Olga and me..   
  
I hated it. Truthfully, wholly and fully. My life now officially sucked.  
  
As I walked I noticed it must be dusk. the way the light played tricks in the sky, with the red and purples, and magenta's. I guess I always took time to notice it, just not as often as I should. I couldn't understand these feelings.   
  
Suddenly I realized just how confused I was.. I mean wasn't it just the other day I was walking down these same sidewalks and streets ranting and raving about my passionate obsession over Arnold? now it's a confused psyco babble on what my life could have, should have and won't be like.   
  
This was pathetic!!!!!   
  
Who was I anymore? I felt so lost, I'm only 9 years old for pete's sake!!! I'm not supposed to go insane yet. Atleast wait till I hit 14 or 15 to do that.   
  
I just don't understand life. I'm unhappy with my parents are alive. Then I'm unhappy when they aren't. Am I ever happy?  
  
"This just isn't fair!!" I say out without thought only to be interrupted, and scared to death.  
  
"What's not fair Helga?"   
  
Arnold?! "Arnold?!" I said aloud and turned around then gasped at how close we were.."What were you doing? spying on me football head?" I scowled and turned to walk away...only to feel his hand clamp over my wrist.  
  
"I'm not going to let you give me the cold shoulder again Helga." he said firmly.  
  
Did he just give me an order..in a way? he rarely did that..was he mad at me? Turning around I struggled to keep my 'stay out of my face' look but it turned into a 'I don't know what I'm thinking' look instead.  
  
He sighed and dragged me over to a bench.   
  
"Hey! I can walk by myself you know!" I grumbled but the weak feeling in my knees at his touch wouldn't allow me to break free..like I would want to?  
  
"I know, and you can talk yourself. So I want you tell me what's wrong, we're alone, nobody's here to make fun of you or anything." he said matter-of-factly.  
  
And he was right..it was these times when I usually opened up. It seemed right, but what could I tell him? That I hate my life now that my parents were gone? that I wished they were alive? No way! After all the complaining I put up about them?! What would he say?  
  
After a few moments of silence he pressed again. "Helga?"   
  
I looked up at him unsure of what to say. "I don't know Arnold..that's the plain and simple truth..I don't know"   
  
He sighed. "What do you mean? what don't you know? mixed feelings?" he asked.  
  
I nodded shortly. "You could say that." I said even shorter  
  
"I Understand." he said softly..  
  
"How could you understand!! You didn't lose your parents---" I stopped and realized what I said. "Oh..sorry Arnold..I didn't mean that." I said slowly.  
  
He was silent for a minute scaring me to think that he now hated me. "Arnold?" I asked softly.  
  
"It's alright Helga, I understand." He said as if he forced it out. Was he really mad at me for that?  
  
"Are you mad at me?" I asked trying to keep my cool.."Well not like I'd care or anything" I added  
  
I heard him huff a little. " No I'm not mad at you..is there anything else you want to talk about?" he asked.  
  
I shuddered mentally. 'There's way too much I want to talk about. Nobody would understand.. not you, Dr. Bliss, Phoebe..me..' I thought sadly. "No.." I said plainly.  
  
"Ok Helga" he replied.  
  
I kept my eyes averted from his gaze, and caught sight of the sunset, now in full blast, the colors playing on the clouds like fine art, purples, deep blues, yellows, oranges..all the colors of a stunning rainbow after a hard day...My frown turned into a soft smile, that I didn't even pick up, but that Arnold seemed to have.  
And right now I didn't care.  
  
He stayed silent and watched the sunset as well before turning and smiling a little. "Well Helga, I think I'll be getting home, see you in school tomorrow maybe.." and he left..  
  
Once he was out of earshot I said softly. " My true love, saves me from the depths of despair once more..goodbye my love.." and i turned around and walked in the opposite direction, passing by Gerald and Phoebe as i went.  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
When I got home I went straight to my room, layed down and pulled out my poem book..and started to write.  
  
Tomorrow I would stay home.. I couldn't face school, and I couldn't handle seeing Arnold again, I know he'd try to get me to talk again.. Or maybe Simmons..  
  
I heard a song by Chicago playing faintly from my sisters room as I went to get a shower.  
  
When I came out it was on another song, she must be playing an C.D or something.   
  
When I finally thought of sleep it was 11:30, and i wasn't really tired. I had already told both my uncle and Olga that I was to be staying home tomorrow, and they both agree'd saying it would probably be for the best.   
  
So I lay down falling asleep to a tune I couldn't quite understand behind closed doors but i think it was "You're the inspiration.."  
*******************************************************************************  
Arnolds POV  
  
When the next day rolled around I noticed that Helga wasn't in school. Though I think I understood why, there was something that Helga wasn't telling, and I knew it was killing her inside, she would break down soon..hopefully not to the point where she got hurt.  
  
I got really worried, and all through school kept exchanging glances with Phoebe. And we talked a little during lunch and between classes.  
  
The day went by relatively quickly. Nothing special, Rhonda was still getting the cold shoulder, but people were talking to her. Phoebe and Gerald spent a bit more time together today..and I was left out in the cold, save for stinky and sid.  
  
So when that night came, after calling Gerald and telling him I would see him on Saturday or Sunday, then calling phoebe to remind her of the time, I ate dinner, grabbed a snack, took a shower, got dressed for bed and finished packing..then fell asleep..  
  
But what I didn't know was what would happen while I was in Lousiana, and the effects it could have on the rest of my life..  
@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@  
  
Ooh..bad ending...bad bad ending..lol  
  
Well chapter 7 will come soon! I prommmmmmmmmmmmmmmisee!! I'm OVER MY WRITERS BLOCK YES YES YES!!!! *jumps around then stops* well if anybody is still reading this..hope you like it!  
  
The ever after goddess of insanity  
  
@};----  
A rose for you, because creation is the best part of living, and without it, where would this world be?  
Kathy M Kidman  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	8. Read me

And what if I said I loved you Authors notes, apologies, comments, and all that:  
  
First off I'd like to say Happy Holidays, and a Merry Christmas to all who celebrate!  
  
Alright, now I realize just how long it's been since I put up the last chapter of "And what if I said I loved you" and it's my favorite story to work on, mostly because it was my first ever for "Hey Arnold" and anything really indepth for that matter....I guess it's actually going to be sad when I post up the last chapter, because i'm gunna be sad when it's over.  
  
Umm *coughs* anyways, it's now 12/24/01 and nearing the end of the year, I want to wish everybody luck and happiness and all that, and to say thank you all my reviewers and faithfull fans. (looks around) if I have any left. I'm so terribly sorry that it's taken me so long to get to Chapter 7! Gosh I feel bad! But I kinda delved into the world of Harry Potter, and am still there, but I've gotten a flash of inspiration and the ending of "And what if I said I loved you" is on the way! Be prepared cause it's going to be a little sad..angsty would you say?  
  
So now, I want to say that the story has sort of grown up and evolved over the 7 chapters. Not long for a story I know, but I want to tell you all that from this fanfiction (and I mean this literally) I've learned that my authoring abilities aren't as bad as I thought and I've decided to become an author when I get older. yah I know that means probably very little to all of you, as you are all probably 200 billion times better than me in writing, but I'm an aspiring author with a Murder Mystery and a short story in my mind. So well if you see a blonde haired blue eyed girl going by Suzanne or something like that, (maybe I'll Keep kathy m. kidman?) dunno.. *sighs* Just drop by and say hi or something hehe.  
  
This isn't much of an authors notes is it? I guess I could tell you that in Chapter 7, everything comes undone for Helga and of course who's there to help her? Arnold, and of course Phoebe, but she realizes what's going on and is staying back, now Shocrel and her friend told me I should have a chapter 8 during like the 4th of july, but I have an ending that would just say...well that works too *raises an eyebrow at her song* nevermind, anyways. If all goes well, Helga and Arnold will of course come closer. Though, I dunno just how close, she's not going to "blurt" her obsession out Parsay, infact you be surprised just who does the confessing.....  
  
So well, to any and all still reading and still anything, I thank you from the bottom of my heart, and if there are any Harry Potter or Sailor moon fans reading this check me out at my new pen name: Ms. Prongs and my best friend out at WYLTK yes that's the id. Please guys, if you have any ways to make this fic better, or anything you want changed, or if you WANT a next chapter, or anything, a sequal perhaps? or just a few fics to tell about their future together, if there is one (gets a mysterious look then winks) please mail me  
  
Sailor_Sol_14@yahoo.com I live only to serve, and to write. Plus..I must ask that nobody laugh at me for this next upcoming chapter, it's going to be sad I realize, maybe sappy just don't laugh too hard, I've been working really really hard to develope my writing, and I think that in writing my Harry Potter fics I've had a change to mature in my writing so now maybe I'll get a good "Hey arnold" chapter out that will blow everybody's minds out..  
  
Now..hopefully by the time anybody reads this little piddly authors notes/READ ME or whatever Chapter 7 will be out. But if not, please stay tuned within the next two days it'll be out! I've lost inspiration the HP world and gained in the HA world..so hey. *shrugs* and you know, I always enjoy hearing people's thoughts, questions, concerns, and umm maybe any things about new stories I could, IDEA'S yeah that's the word *grins* So now..anyways. please mail me, review or something, I wanna hear from you guys!  
  
Ms. Prongs aka Kathy M. Kidman  
  
@};------ 


	9. Death and Friendship

And what if I said I loved you?  
  
Chapter 7: Death and Friendship  
  
By: Kat  
  
Disclaimer: HA! =CB...not me.lol  
  
AN: Changed 1/19/02  
  
All right, here's the update...I've got a Sinus Infection, earache. And about 8 back assignments from missing 3 days of school in a row. I've not had much time to do anything since the 20th of December, in which I got the first of a line of "Chronic Colds" leading up to the final one this past Tuesday, in which I was taken out of school on Wednesday, and then taken to the doctors on Thursday, put on medication and told to rest. rest rest rest. So I did.  
  
Now it's Saturday the 19th, I've finally got time to do something (which SHOULD be homework, but I got inspired) so I figured I'd get up as much as I could on my story...  
  
It's not much because I can't really think while on Codine and Doxycycline..Both make me really tired and nauseous.  
  
But I MUST gets this chapter out; only it'll be in two parts. I think.  
  
Anyways, I've got a new angle on the whole Arnold/Hula thing, it'll show up in the next chapter or 2..as next chapter is going to be the final one.  
  
Again sorry for the delay, but my immune system got the better of me.  
  
Enjoy.  
  
**************************************************************************** ***  
  
Arnolds POV  
  
I woke up the next morning, and had a very, different train of thought. One that hit me about 3 hours before I was to go to the Air Port.  
  
So after eating breakfast, and listening to Grandpa and Mr. Kokoshka fight over the last sausage I took a shower, got dressed, and finished packing. By the time 8:00 o'clock rolled around I called Phoebe's house.  
  
"Moshi Moshi" came an adults voice.  
  
"Um...Moshi Moshi Mr. Hyerdahl, is Phoebe there?" I asked  
  
" Certainly, one minute please" I could hear him put down the phone, and a few seconds later be picked up. "Arnold?" she asked.  
  
"Yeah, Phoebe, I've got an Idea." I said slowly....and we started to talk about our newly revised plan.  
  
**************************************************************************** ***  
  
Helga's POV  
  
To be woken up by a Olga at 7:22 in the morning is bad..but to be woken up by my uncle at 8:00 is even WORSE considering I was in a horrible mood.  
  
"Helga, are you up yet? I have somethings to talk to you about." I heard him call from outside my door.  
  
"Go away!, I'm trying to sleep!" I yelled back only to hear him continue to bother me.  
  
"Alright alright!! I'll get up..geesh!! you're worse than Olga..I'm up already." i muttered and got dressed, my usual outfit, leaving my hair down, I walked down to the living room.  
  
"Now what do you want?" I asked as the phone rang.  
  
"I'll get it.." called Olga and she picked it up.  
  
I couldn't hear the conversation, but it seemed interesting, mostly cause she moved out of hearing range, so it must've involved me..dunno, maybe she was talking to Dr. Bliss about me not coming to my session today.  
  
"Helga? are you there?" I heard my uncle call and I snapped back to the present situation.  
  
"Huh? yeah I'm here..whattid you want to talk about that required getting me up early?" I asked.  
  
"Well, I was just concerned for you. I mean I am your uncle, me and your brother were pretty close. And I know it's going to be hard for you to, get on with your life after this. So if there's anything you want to talk about, or anything you want to do, like living arrangements or something, you know I'll be here, and you have your choice, you can stay here with me in your house, or go with your sister." He said and I sighed.  
  
"I'll think about it ok?...can I go now? there's nothing I want to talk about at the moment."  
  
He looked at me for a minute with a wierd look then nodded silently as I stood up.  
  
So as I went up to my room, passing a whispering Olga I sighed and shook my head. Then walked up the stairs and closed the door to my room. This week, had been...terrible. I thought I'd be happy if my parents were dead, and yet here I am broken up inside. It wasn't fair..  
  
After about 10 minutes of silent packing, I heard a knock at my door. "Yeah what is it?" my irritable voice answered.  
  
"There's been a change in plans baby sister, We've got to leave in 10 minutes..." she said.  
  
"WHAT?! but we were supposed to leave at--3:30 this afternoon! This is so bogus!" I cried.  
  
"Well it's going to be a bit earlier, a flight opened up for 9:30 this morning. So we have to leave by 8:45 to get there, now hurry.." she said and ran out of the room to pack as well.  
  
"Man, this is SO..unfair, it sucks.." I complained loudly to myself and threw my C.D. Player and a few C.D's into my carry on bag, as well as my journal and of course a few other things. By the time 8:30 rolled around I walked down stairs and put my stuff in the back of my Uncle's car. Then got in and waited for Olga and him to come out.  
  
By the time they did I had dozed, but was easily awoke when we arrived. "Helga, sister come on, we're gunna be late.." she muttered to me softly and I woke up. I'd forgotten to put my hair up, so now it was all curly and crap.  
  
"Olga, My hair! I gotta put it up!" I said as she took me by the wrist and practically dragged me out of the car and too the Airport enterence..  
  
"Oh nonsense little sis, you look fine.." she grinned cheerily.  
  
By the time we got there we had 15 minutes to get our tickets, get checked out, and everything else..  
  
Olga got mine first and told me to grab my carry on right away and head to the plane.  
  
I looked at her suspiciously and then sat down in one of the seats at the terminal (I haven't been in Airport for 6 years..lol I think it's a terminal, if not shoot me) and looked around, I thought I saw Olga coming up, and I did, she had a strange, devilish smile that had "evil" written all over it.  
  
"Time to get on the plane little sis" she said and we headed towards the door.  
  
Once on the plane I was looking for my seat, and when I found the seat "15a" I took a few steps further and then looked up my jaw dropped and I tripped over my carry on which I had put on the floor. "Ack!" and I tumbled over.  
  
"Are you ok Helga?" came the all too familiar voice of Arnold.  
  
"Ar-Arnold??" I asked getting up and smiling nervously, silently cursing Olga.  
  
"Yes?" he asked with that boyish innocence I so adored.  
  
I stared for a second and then shook my head. "what are you doing here?!" I exclaimed, though somewhere in my mind I already knew the answer.  
  
And just before he answered Phoebe walked up and smiled. "Salutations Helga."  
  
I looked at her for a second as if trying to understand what was going on. "what are you doing here?"  
  
"Arnold and i have decided to accompany you to the funeral."  
  
"Sort of like moral support." he finished glancing at me.  
  
Stunned I went to sit down in my seat, only to miss and fall to the ground again, I heard chuckling from above me and got up. "Think that's funny eh?" I asked and actually sat down in the window seat, Arnold beside me, and Olga and Phoebe in the seats behind us.  
  
After a while the captain came on, gave the usual speech, had the flight attendants give the safety speech, and then told everybody to secure the seatbelts and keep trays and seats in the upright positition, yadda yadda yadda..  
  
Soon enough we were in the air and the city was now way below us, and behind us. "you aren't mad are you Helga?" Arnold asked bringing be back to reality.  
  
"Huh? o-oh, no..I guess not, besides it's not like I could tell you to get lost or anything, we're like Thirty thousand feet up in the air, unless of course you can fly.." I said sarcastically and he only chuckled which made me all the more unsettled.  
  
"Good..cause I wouldn't leave even if you told me too." he said and then paused, and looked down, apparently embaressed by his remark.  
  
An unsettling silence fell between us and I looked up. "Hey arnold?" I said tentatively.  
  
"Hm?"  
  
"Thanks.." I muttered and he smiled, and with that I put my C.D player on and listened to the Cranberries, eventually dozing off again.  
  
~*~  
  
Arnolds POV  
  
When I looked over a few minutes later Helga had drifted off to sleep so I turned around to talk to Olga adn Phoebe for a while.  
  
"Was she upset about us accompanying her?" Phoebe asked as she picked up a book and Olga got a quizzical expression.  
  
"I don't think so, just shocked.." I said slowly.  
  
"I kind of suspected as much, she really wasn't looking forward to doing this, and I think it would have been worse had she been alone." Olga said with a thoughtful look.  
  
That seemed to be the end of the conversation for now, so I sat back down and looked at Helga smiling softly, as she was(in her sleep) too.  
  
She looked peaceful in sleep..and with that peace brought a certain beauty.  
  
SIghing I put on my own headset and settled down.  
  
~*~  
  
Helga's POV  
  
Sometime later I woke up to somebody shaking me. "helga! wake up, we're here!"  
  
"Hmm?" I mumbled then realize it was Arnold. Blushing slightly I stood up and we got off silently.  
  
"Helga, baby sister! over ehre!" I heard Olga calling.  
  
"What?" I asked warily.  
  
"Now, I've made arrangements for grammy to take you, Arnold, and Phoebe to the house while grandpa and I go--um, make arrangements for the, funeral." she said and I could see her fighting back tears.  
  
"Alright.." my voice came out as a whisper but I felt a hand on my shoulder, turning around I saw Arnold smiling at me softly, returning the smile we found Phoebe already with my grandma, who, after a hug ushered us into the car (for a 65 year old she was a really good driver) and took us to the house.  
  
~*~  
  
Arnolds POV  
  
Through the car drive home I watched Helga sit silently looking out the window, she seemed rather distant. Then again who wouldn't be after having their parents die, or lost..I know the feeling.  
  
"Helga?" I asked wondering just how far gone she was.  
  
Silence came from her and I decided to try again. "Helga."  
  
I watched as her reflection shifted slightly so her eyes were on me instead of the fields. "what?"  
  
"Just wondering how you were doing.." I said slowly.  
  
"I'm fine Arnold." she said softly and went back to her gaze out the window and I knew then that the conversation was over, looking up to the front seat I found phoebe looking back sadly so I gave her a reassuring smile and then decided to listen to the music that was playing over the old car radio.  
  
~*~  
  
Helga's POV  
  
When we got out of the car half an hour later I looked up at my grandparents house, I sighed sadly and waited at the front door for everybody else to come up. I eyed Phoebe and Arnold talking to eachother and then grumbled to myself as grandma let us in.  
  
"Alright you three, there are two rooms upstairs made for you too. Helga dear, you and Phoebe can share a bedroom, there are two beds, and Arnold, you can get the bedroom on the left. I'll have gramps send everything else up later, just take your carry ons up and get settled, dinners at 7:30..if you need anything, you know where to find me." she said and smiled then swept out of the room.  
  
"Well then, what's say we go get ready.." I said in a fake chipper voice and led the way to the two rooms next to eachother. "I bet she made them look really fancy, grams is always like that.." I muttered opening one room and letting Phoebe in then casting a glance at Arnold went in after.  
  
"Oh! this room is beautiful Helga! is this usually your room when you come visit?" I hear phoebe ask and then turn to look at her.  
  
"I think so yeah, only the bed's usually on the opposite side of the room, near the window, and the dressers not in the closet.." I say smirking then get my headset, and journal out of my bag and set them on my bed, only stuffing the journal under the pillow.  
  
"So Helga, what would you like to do until supper time, work on Japanese perhaps?" Phoebe asked neatly folding a few of her clothes that she brought along 'incase there was a spill on the plane' and placing them on her bed.  
  
"Mm, no Japanese right now Phoebes, but could you do me a favor?"  
  
She seemed caught off guard, probably because I wasn't ordering her around. "yes?"  
  
"Could you go get me a sprite? Grams and Gramps always keep a few in the fridge for when I visit."  
  
Looking at me for a second she nodded slowly still shocked. "Alright Helga..be right back." she said and with that left the room.  
  
I sat down and pulled out my journal, looked around and opened it to a blank page and began to write.  
  
' Dear Journal,  
  
Yeah I know it's been forever since i've written in this little book, but too much has happened so I'll paraphrase, my parents are dead, Arnold seems to be warming up to me, me and Olga are getting closer, I found out the kids at school don't like you if you're yourself..and my parents funeral is sometime tomorrow... so there.  
  
Anyways, just thought I'd update someobyd, since I can't talk to anybody else. But anyways, Arnold and I..we've been talking alot lately..alone. Seems to me, he likes me for me..but I'm not sure if it's the "bully me" or the "me me" that sometimes slips through by accident.. If he only knew how I truely felt for him everything would be fine.  
  
Well that's all for now,  
  
Helga.'  
  
Luckily I shut the book just as I turned around because Arnold was looking in the room. I cried out and fell off the bed in shock. Blushing as I got up I shot him a dirty look and stuffed the journal back under my pillow and walked past him. "What do you want football head?"  
  
"Just wanted to see what you were up to..um, phoebe said she'd be up in a while, she was going to ask your grandmother about something..I forgot what it was." he said and smiled a little.  
  
"Oh, figures..talk is definatly more important than my sprite.."  
  
"Actually, here.." he said and handed me a Sprite, I looked between it and him for a second before taking it, and stopping myself from blushing.  
  
"Umm, thanks.." I said with an awkward tone of voice. 'note to self, stick my head in locker, and get phoebe to shut it when we get back.'  
  
"Something wrong?"  
  
"Wha? n-no, of course not, if you'll excuse me I think i'm going to go get something to snack on." I replied slowly, then stopped half way down the stairs not realizing he had been watching me. "Ar-arnold?"  
  
"Yes Helga?"  
  
"Thanks." I said and quickly dissapeared down the stairway.  
  
"Welcome Helga.." he said mostly to himself and went back to his room.  
  
~*~  
  
Arnolds POV  
  
It took about 2 hours for Helga to come back upstairs, but only after a talk from her sister about something. I caught her mumbling to herself and I think I caught the words 'death by stupification' once..but I can't be sure.  
  
By the time dinner came around Helga still hadn't been downstairs and I was getting worried, I mean, I know she's not the most social even under normal circumstances, but she's got to eat right?  
  
"Would you excuse me?" I asked and everybody looked at me, but Olga smiled a little.  
  
"Take her up something to eat Arnold, please?" she asked and i nodded and took the plate she'd made. "Thanks so much."  
  
"Yup.." and I went upstairs and knocked on the closed door..only to get silence. "Helga?"  
  
"What?" came the muffled reply.  
  
"A-are you alright?"  
  
A delay in her response told me no, but she only said. "Yes, now go away football head."  
  
Rolling my eyes I took the chance to open the door with my free hand.  
  
"Hey!" she cried and jumped off the bed she'd been laying on and stuffed a book under the pillowcase. "Don't you know how to knock?!"  
  
I failed to supress my smile at this. "I did knock Helga.."  
  
"What? oh..right..and didn't I say to go away?" she asked making a face.  
  
"Yes, but I was told to bring up something for you to eat, and I wasn't about to go back downstairs with a full plate of food." at her look I sighed. "You've got to eat Helga, whether you want to or not, you can't go and make yourself sick.."  
  
"I'm not trying to." she snapped half-heartedly.  
  
"Sure looks like it." I replied hiding a smile at her annoyed expression.  
  
"Look, Arnold..I'm really not feeling good, you can leave the food and I'll eat later but please could I just be left alone?" she asked and I could have sworn she sounded depressed.  
  
The sincerity in her voice caused me to lose my smile and set the dish down on the table next to her bed. "Alright Helga.."  
  
She kept her eyes trained on the floor so I knew she really wanted to be alone. "Um, if you need to talk I'm here.." I offered and at her nod I smiled sadly and shut the door softly as I left.  
  
Apon getting downstairs Phoebe and Olga were the only two left at the table, at their expectant looks I said slowly. "She's--not feeling too good, I left the food and came back downstairs."  
  
"Oh."  
  
"alright.."  
  
With that we ate in silence.  
  
~*~  
  
Helga's POV  
  
Why did he have to be such a good friend, why couldn't he be uncaring..does anybody know how hard it was for me to turn down his offer of help? but i've already cried infront of him enough. It wouldn't be right would it?  
  
Suddenly my stomache rumbled, yet I cast a perturbed look at the plate on the night table. I mean, I guess I should eat right? But still..Olga told me when the funeral was, it would be tomorrow at 4:30 in the afternoon, and that was the reason why I wasn't hungry. But the look Arnold gave me, true concern..he was really worried about me, so that was the one reason I could eat right? Right.  
  
I pushed a strand of hair out of my face and only then realized that it was still down. So I quickly threw it into a pony tail and sat down at the edge of my bed and took the plate, looked at it and silently began to eat.  
  
~*~  
  
Arnolds POV  
  
It had been about 20 minutes since everybody had finished eating and there was still silence throughout the house. Helga's grandparents had went to the store for some snacks for everybody and Olga was reading up on some paper work while Phoebe read some of her book.  
  
Which left me with absolutely nothing to do.  
  
But unfortunatly the silence was shattered when there was a crash of something on the ground and a scream, that could only be recognized as Helga's. "Uh oh.." and with that I bolted upstairs followed closely by Olga and Phoebe, hopefully nothing was wrong.  
  
****  
  
Hah, would this be my first cliffy?  
  
Sorry..but my heads hurting again.  
  
It'll be a cliffy till I get done..  
  
Sorry for the delay guys..  
  
Er..anyways, thanx to those still sticken with me...expect chapter 8 out sooner than later, because I'm feeling a bit better now that I've got my anti-biotics.  
  
So..well hey...be prepared!  
  
And any Harry Potter fans check out my, er..harry Potter fics? please? 


	10. Too much to bear

And what if I said I loved you?  
  
Chapter 8: Too much to bare

Disclaimer: Boy. If you think I own the show after this long, you're pretty darn messed up.

AN: 

All right, as of today (5/11/02) I have decided to:   
A) start practicing my better writing skills (creative writing personal classes lol.) not much to go on, but I'm getting there *1-800-how am I writing. Lol* 

And  
B) change quite a bit of what you know about Helga's past, which draws the whole blasted story out LONGER than before. Lol, now it's about what? 3 chapters longer, and I'm re-writing chapters 1-...err 7 as we speak.  So when you see the flashbacks for Helga, remember there will be something leading up to it in chapter 1, and it will be explained in further detail in the months to come *smirks* my moms just granted me full permission to write all summer!!!!!!!

*Dances around happily*

So. just read on.  
  
Warning however: should there be some unlucky soul out there who hasn't seen "April Fools day" or "Dinner for Four", "Helga on the couch", "Helga's Potion" and "Helga's Masquerade" from now on, there will be various spoilers from these episodes, very subtle additions into the scenes of my story.    
  
I've decided to mature my writing a little (NO! not that way! lol) I'm going to go for a dynamic way of writing, lol...like that's going to work *shrugs* wish me luck. 

But I warn you, maybe I'm over analyzing, but I've got a new idea on how my little "confession" is going to come out, and whether it's in chapter 8, or 9.well we'll just have to wait and see...

~*~*~*~*~

After Helga's scream had pierced the air everybody had scrambled up to her room in an instant, and upon opening the door we saw her look up in embarrassment, a broken plate on the ground surrounded by food.   
  
"Helga, what happened?" I asked when nobody else did.

She got a sheepish expression and then smiled nervously. "Oh, n-nothing, a spider landed on my shoulder and surprised me, darned thing." she said and laughed a little.  
  
I heard phoebe giggle and I shook my head and after Olga went to get a broom stuff to clean up the floor helped Helga clean.  "I didn't know you were afraid of spiders." I commented after a moment of silence.

"I'm not, but if a spider had landed on your shoulder you'd be shocked too." she said with a little bit of amusement in her voice. 

When she looked up again I caught her eyes for a second smiling a little and had to suppress a chuckle when she looked away flustered.  But before I could say anything a door downstairs was heard opening, then closing, voices murmuring then Olga called upstairs.

"Helga! Arnold! Come downstairs you two!"

We exchanged glances and she nodded slightly to my 'You want to?' look.

"We're coming!" I called back and we got the rest of the food into the trashcan then went downstairs quickly.

When we got there Helga's grandparents, Phoebe, and Olga were all smiling. "You two, we're going to the movies, would you like to go?" Phoebe asked.

"It's like, a chance to get our minds off all the sadness."

I looked over at Helga who cast a little smirk my way and replied with a half yawn. "Actually, I'm kind of tired, I was really just going to make myself a snack and go upstairs to bed." she said slowly.

"Well, if you're sure lil' sis, Arnold? What about you?" Olga asked turning her blue eyes over to him.

"Actually Olga, I'm a little tired too, I think I'll stay here with Helga." Those words didn't really sink in for me for a few seconds but I caught Helga's surprised expression and Olga and Phoebe's exchanged glances.   
  
"Well, if you're sure..."

*****

Helga's POV  
  
After a few more minutes of discussion and turned down offers everybody finally left, leaving Arnold and me alone.

So, what was I going to do? I mean here we are, me and Arnold, my cornflower haired angel, my muse, my obsession ...who is looking at me as if I'm half dead.

"...Helga? You there?" he asked waving his hand in front of my face.

"Huh? What? oh..yeah, whatta you want?"  
  
"I was just wondering, were you really tired, or did you just say that to get out of going to the movies with your family?" he asked me, and I raised an eyebrow.

"Not that it's any of your business, but yes I just wanted to get out of going to the movies, but I am also a little tired, so it's only half a lie." I countered.

"That's kind of what I thought." he replied and I shot him a look. "So, what do you want to do?"  
  
"You mean I have to spend the rest of the evening with you?" I asked in a half sarcastic half teasing voice.

"If you think you'll live through the time, yes." he grinned and I rolled my eyes.

"So...what ARE we going to do?"

~*~

A couple of hours later found the both of us on the sofa in the living room watching TV in an unusually comfortable silence.

"You know--" Arnold said clicking the television off suddenly. "I've been thinking lately."

"I thought I smelled smoke," I muttered just loud enough for him to hear and he shot me a glance but continued.

"I never did apologize fully to you for what happened on April fools day."

Looking at him with a confused look I started to reply, but never got any further than "What do you.." before the door opened and voices were heard entering, soon enough Phoebe walked into the room and stopped when she saw the both of us sitting on the sofa.  Raising an eyebrow she looked at me and I glared at her, and suddenly my defenses that I had worked so hard to battle down shot back up and I shot up from the couch and ran from the room and upstairs. 

  
Just before I ran into phoebes and my room, I caught sight of the window at the end of the hall and smiled softly in remembrance.

_"Mother, Father! I'm home! We have a surprise for you!" I vaguely heard my mom say as we walked into an unfamiliar house.  _

_  
"Mommy, where are we?" I had asked and tugged at her dress. _

_  
"We're at your grandma's Helga, we've come to introduce you to them." she said and stood up._

_Suddenly I heard footsteps from the stairs and upon looking up I saw two older people, one with long curly blond tinging with white hair and these sparkly blue eyes that shone with life when she looked down at me.  Her green flowered dress and jasmine perfume seemed to fill the room with a life I never felt before at home.   
  
The other person, looked a little older..Greyish hair, crinkly green eyes and a bright smile._

_"My oh my, what do we have here? Who is this darling angel you've brought to us Miriam?" I heard my grandma cry as she picked me up.  I felt an instant love from her arms._

_  
"My name's Helga, I'm 2 and a half years old, you're gramma, mommy's told you about me no. Told me about you...  You're her mommy right? You're pretty! I like your perfume it smells sweet. What's your name?"_

_The barrage from a two year old caught them off guard I think because my grandpa had raised an eyebrow, but my grandma just smiled softly and chuckled. "Yes I'm your mothers mom, the perfume is Jasmine, and my name is Janice, but you can call me grandma if you like, and that tall handsome man over there is your grandpa, his names Gregg, say hi Gregory." _

_The older man picked me up and held me in his arms gently.  I felt love from him too.  This was new! I liked the feeling. "I like you Grampa Gregg." I said and giggled, he smelled like tobacco and mint. "No, I love you. I love you grandpa." I said my voice full of admiration._

_This surprised the older people in the room.  Never had they heard such a young child talk so mature before.   
  
But Olga suddenly took center stage when she couldn't stand the attention not on her anymore and dove in with a story about her latest piano recital and award._

_Grandpa set me down and I looked up at the older people. Olga was talking excitedly, my mommy was smiling proudly, and my daddy was grinning from ear to ear, they never did that around me._

_I suddenly got curious and made my way up the stairs to the second floor, not noticing my grandmother following me quietly._

_"Wow..." I said in a loud whisper and toddled over to the window that was at the edge of the hallway. This place was HUGE!_

_I tried to look over the edge but I couldn't it was too tall, and I started to sniffle._

_  
"Oh, oh..Don't cry little angel. Come on, let me show you something." I heard and then felt my grandma's warm grasp around my waist as she lifted me up.  Suddenly I saw it! It was a large tree and very pretty.  _

_"See. well no you can't. here." she set me into one arm, opened the window, then stepped out onto some sort of patio. "This is where I come to sit and think, to get away from the real world Helga. I imagine you already know about the real world," she said to me seriously.  _

_At my wide stare she grinned. "Maybe you do, maybe you don't." she sighed then perked up. "What's say I show you something else, it was a secret place for your mother.  Gramps built it for her when she was 6.  But I think you're smart enough not to try and climb up there just yet, so come on, hold on."   
  
This lady was crazy! She had to be in her 50's at least, and she was climbing a tree. Whoa we're high.Hey! cool, a floor.."Gramma we're up high, are we goin' to fawl?" I asked as she set me on the floor and smiled._

_"Not if you don't try to crawl over the edge you won't." _

_"I won't gramma I pr-promise.." I said looking up at her. _

_"That's a good girl, my little angel." she murmured and pulled me into her lap and hugged me._

_"I love you gramma."  
  
"And I you Helga." _

Walking up to the window I opened it and smiled softly as I crawled onto the balcony and looked up to the tree, so many memories.

_"Gramma!!" I yelled and barreled through the door to my grandparents' house and launched myself into her arms. She grabbed me and laughed as she hugged me. _

_  
"So how's my angel doing?" she asked_

_"Fine Gramma, it's good to see you again! I missed you so much!" I said and my parents, followed by Olga walked in and the usual greetings followed._

_"Miriam, has Helga had a nap lately?"_

_"No mom, she--she didn't sleep all through the plane trip, put her down for us?"_

_"No problem" she winked at me and we went upstairs, but instead of to my room she took me to the window, then on the balcony, and holding me tightly we climbed.  Once settled she pulled me into her lap._

_"So how are you?"  
  
"I-fine, gramma? Why did you lie to momma?"_

_"I didn't lie sweetie, you don't nap anymore do you?" at my nod she chuckled. "So how can I lie about something you don't do anyways?" (How's that logic for ya.) "Now, you sure angel? I know you know the real world," she said seriously and I nodded to her silently._

_"I know the real world gramma, and it's ok for me." I trailed of looking at my feet._

_"Now Helga, are you lying to me?"_

_"Lying? Gramma! I wouldn't lie to you!! never!" I exclaimed looking up at her quickly._

_"No, I know sweetie, so what's bothering you?"  
  
"What do you mean?"  
  
She chuckled. "I've never known a 4 year old to look and speak so seriously, and you my dear, you have the look of forced maturity."  
  
"Fo-forced mat-matur-maturity?" _

_"How do Miriam and that husband of hers treat you?" that questions confused me. _

_  
"What do you mean?"  
  
"Do they give you enough love? do they talk to you a lot? Take you places?" she looked at me sternly, and I knew I had to tell the truth._

_But why was she speaking like this? My parents loved me, sure they didn't spoil me like Olga, ok so I've had to walk to pre-school for a while, they talk to me like I'm a little girl, but only gramma knows me. Isn't that ok?  
"They love me gramma!"  
  
"Answer my questions Helga." _

_"They talk to me sometimes, not like you though, they don't think I'm as mat-mature as you do. And.." I paused unsure of myself. "Don't get mad with me gramma.."  
  
"I won't angel."_

_"It's nothing wrong or anything, I mean. it's just once or twice.."  
  
"What?"_

_  
"Well sometimes I gotta walk to pre-school, but it's not far!" why were tears in my eyes? was I gunna cry?_

_She got a strange look in her eyes, was she gunna yell at me? Uh-oh.  "Oh, oh honey, no sweetie I'm not mad at you, it's that insolent young lady downstairs and her big oaf of a husband, spoiling Olga and putting you off like that! How-why in all my years. honestly!  Haven't I taught that girl anything about love and respect?" she turned to me and wiped the tears out from my eyes and hugged my tightly.  "This doesn't leave our spot ok hon? I don't want your mother to know any of this, what they're doing isn't right Helga.  It's called emotional abuse.." at my blank stare her face softened. "Well, ok you don't know what that means, but it's not good sweetie, you just. Well you hang in there alright?"_

_"Alright gramma."_

_"Good." she said and hugged me._

Sighing sadly I looked up in the darkness of the tree and for the first time in a long time climbed up to mine and my 'gramma's' special place.  I was lucky to find it in the dark too, but after climbing it with her so many times, it was almost an automatic.

  
So I climbed up and sat down, and started to seriously think about the places my life had gone in the past few years and to tell the truth, I didn't really like the conclusions I was drawing.

*******

Arnolds POV

  
After Helga rushed out of the room my curiosity only peaked further, and when I received a look from both Phoebe and Mrs. Sandly I ran from the living room and upstairs.

But upon getting to the second floor I noted a window open and smiled a little, so she was out there..uh, hopefully there was a balcony or something.  Wandering to the open window I looked out and saw a small light shining on a balcony, white chairs and a simple table in the center, and a large tree lumbering over the house.  'Could Helga be up there? well only one way to find out.' so I climbed out onto the first, and largest branch and looked up into the dark.  "Helga? you up there?"  
  
Silence for a second before, "go away Football head!" 

"What's wrong Helga? can I come up? I want to talk to you." I called up feeling a little silly to be talking to nothing but a voice.  
  
"Nothing's wrong Arnold, no you can't come up! I said leave me alone!" she snapped.

Ok, so she was upset. "No Helga, I'm not going to 'leave you alone', we've got to talk alright? please can I come up? or at least you come down here in the light?"

How high was she anyways?  
  
For a second I thought she was ignoring me, but after I second I heard "Fine, fine." soon followed by little crackles and rustling of leaves signifying she was making her descent down.  Suddenly I heard a large snap, and her gasp then "Eeek!" and before I realized it all the air rushed out of my lungs as Helga almost knocked me over when she fell and I found us almost staring at each other.  

  
"Helga! Are you ok?" I asked then realized, at the exact same time as her, that she was sitting on me.  And with that slightly connected thought she all but threw herself over the balcony and through the window, and landed with a thud on the floor apparently missing the little ledge.    
  
"Crimeny--" she muttered and I chuckled and made my way slowly through the window and helped her up.

"You ok Helga?" I asked softly.

"Besides the stars I'm seeing I'm fine." she retorted and pulled her hand out of mine suddenly backing up slightly towards her room, and I knew she was retreating to her sheltered self 'two steps forward, one step back', this just had to stop.  

"Why won't you let me help you?" I asked and she stopped in her tracks.  
  
"What?" she asked a touch of incredulousness in her voice.   
  
"Why won't you let me help you?" I repeated.

She stared at me for the longest time before her gaze dropped to the floor and she shrugged. "I don't know."  
  
"Is it that you think I won't be able to help? That you don't trust me?"

Her head snapped up quickly and she fixed me with an intense stare that I actually got a little nervous under, did I say the wrong thing.   
  
"Won't be able to help? Don't trust you? Is that what you think? Do you want my honest opinion, well you want it? you got it! No, I don't think you'll be able to help, I do trust you--but this is something you need to keep your nose out of!" 

"What do you mean 'this is something I need to keep my nose out of'? Is there something serious going on in your life?"

"Is that a rhetorical question?" she asked sarcastically.

"Ok, stupid question, but I mean--besides your parents dying, is something else the matter." I pressed. 

"Stop asking that Arnold, you don't know what you're dealing with." she said a little bit of sadness in her angered voice, which to tell the truth only made me more curious.

"I've 'dealt with' a lot of things in my life Helga, you should know that, why shouldn't I understand what you're going through?"  
  
"You wouldn't understand, that's the whole problem! Look _Arnold _just drop it!" she hissed and bolted for her room before I could stop her, and the last form of communication between us was the *slam* of the door.  Sighing in resignation I walked passed the door and, after taking a look at it for a second, went downstairs.

********

Helga's POV

How could he do that to me? What right does he have to ask those questions, to try and help me? He doesn't have the right, that's the thing! God I hate him sometimes. Thinks he can help everybody and everything he comes in contact with.   Well he's wrong, terribly wrong.  My life is something he needs to stay away from, I'd be more willing to admit to him that I loved him than let him know about my past. 

"Stupid football headed jerk." I found myself muttering as I fell backwards onto my bed.  "Just leave me alone!" I yelled at the door and threw my shoe at it, even though I knew he'd gone downstairs already. 

I felt tears welling in my eyes again, and I knew I was going to cry soon, whether I liked it or not.  

"What have I done wrong huh? Somebody want to answer that for me? What the heck have I done wrong to deserve this; my parents hated me and loved my older sister, yet hated and ignored me. 'Pataki's don't talk about their feelings!' 'Something's are best swept under the rug.' 'This would never have happened to Olga' Well you know what Bob? _I'm not Olga! I'm HELGA! _Too bad you couldn't realize that, too bad you never realized you had another daughter living with you.  Too bad you never realized exactly what you did to her, the pain and anger you caused, the resentment and bitterness she gained over the years, and it's too bad you had to die before I got to tell you any of this, it's just too bad!" I said and my voice broke.  "Too bad."

*******  
1st Person POV intro *1st/last time* Janice Sandly (Miriam's mother)

I closed my eyes and fought back the tears that threatened to fall.  My granddaughter, my angel, she was in so much yet I could not help her.  She's locked herself from me, from everybody.  Without looking behind me, I know Helga's friend Arnold is there, how could I explain this to him.  How can I explain the anger, and agony in my grandchild's heart caused by my daughter's ignorance? It's impossible...but I know he'll ask. 

"Dear god." I muttered and put my hand to my mouth, trying in vain to keep from crying, I'd buried this for so long, the anger and pain I felt for my angel, only to have it brought back sharply.  

_"What have I done wrong huh? Somebody want to answer that for me? What the heck have I done wrong to deserve this?"_

I lean against the wall next to the door and look at him, he looks so mature for somebody only 9 years old, I smile weakly at him and wipe away a stray tear.  "I'm sorry." was all I said to him, but what surprised me was this.

"So am I Mrs. Sandly." those five words, for some strange reason surprised me, as did his next actions. 

He walked to the door, and opened it, looked at me and then walked in and shut the door and locked it.

I looked at the door for a second, wondering what just happened, and why he didn't ask.  

Sliding down the wall I could hear the beginning of an argument in the room, strange. I could have sworn they were 9 years old.  So why, suddenly, did they seem like they were going on 23?

********

_Can anybody every truly understand, what pain goes through a persons mind?  
What cruelties they've endured, what hardships they've befallen?_

_Is it so hard to imagine, that not everybody's life is perfect?_

_and that 'I'm sorry' doesn't always work?  
Emotional bruises are a lot worse than Physical ones, for more reasons then one._

There's something about her, that doesn't seem quite right.

Not exactly sure what it is, but I think it's her eyes.

Usually so intense, the blue crystals have dimmed.

What could have caused this? What has happened to this child?  
Nobody should have that look, the look of abandonment and pain.

Maybe it's Naivety, or maybe it's just me.

But something in the way she hides from me,

Says, "Please, help me."

_I'm tired of the pain I feel, tired of the weight I have to bear,_

_I want to throw it to the ground, and lie down and die._

_The loneliness is closing in; I think I'm beginning to drown._

_You see through me don't you?_

_Maybe you can help me? Pull me from the edge._

_Because, I think I'm losing my grip and now it seems to easy, to let myself fall._

You've taken the first step, admitting you're in pain

Even if you had to do it, while in a screaming rage.

I always knew you were different, from every other girl,

I could never have imagined in just how many ways.

Let me help you, please don't deny

Because, I've seen you twice before, and I hate to see you cry.

Behind that wall of sufferance, is a soul to beautiful to hide.

Let me be the one, my friend, to help show you the way.

It's lonely where you are, please come back down.

I'll help to ease your pain.

11:02 PM (5-11-02)

~*~                               ~*~

There's my tribute for the weekend...the poem up there, was written by me on the spot, I'm not sure, but I think it fits the plot.  I felt it had to be written, to describe the anguish Helga felt..as you can see, the 1st part is Helga, 2nd Arnold, 3rd Helga, and 4th Arnold.

I wanted to apologize to you all, for making you wait so long to get this story, but I think the point I proved at the end, is that, instead of physical abuse, like I've read about in a few stories, there's a bit more emotional problems there..just like Dr. Bliss mentioned..

As you can see as well that my vision of this is more than just a confession she needs to make, what she needs a full soul cleansing..Helga needs some help, because, though this is a kid's show, you never know what goes on in an abused child's mind. (I speak from half way personal experience)

Don't get at me for pushing this emotional abuse issue, I'm already really blue, I just wanted you guys to know, this is going to be a bit more prominent, and the details will become more pronounced, I'm not going to let the fact that she's so angry, slide as a tortured romance.  I hope you all understand, I do thank any and all who have read this far, and are still with me.

@};----

Sincerely yours, Serina-Sweet (Ms. Prongs)

Adieu


	11. Tears and Laughter An Encounter

**And what if I said I loved you?** _Tears and Laughter - An Encounter_ **Disclaimer:** what..like you didn't know by now? I don't own hey arnold kay? good..  
  
**Authors Notes:**  
  
It's been forever since I've looked at this story...and actually I thought I'd lost this chapter till I searched for it this morning. *blinks*  
  
This is the hold over chapter, you guys'll probably just hate me more, but you guys are starting to scare me by yelling... well I've not gotten any death threats yet, so I'm content..   
Lol.   
  
Actually, this chapter I realized has more than just emotional abuse and stuff, it's like.. kind of a lot darker than it should be, because once I get the chance to re-write my story (which i will, I swear to god, I've got half of chapter one re-written, chapters two and up under plans, I just need to sort out all the idea's in my head for all the stories I'm writing, and there are a lot..) it will be DARK, I mean, not suicide dark, but angsty and all that good stuff. *nods sagely*  
  
But anyways, I hope this tides you over, it's short and not so sweet. Not the best, but not the worst.   
  
Please forgive me though. I've been getting quite a few reviews lately yelling at me to update, and I'm now on my knees begging you all not to hate me, if I have to I'll switch on Savage Garden again TODAY and push out another chapter whilest I'm taking a breather from Inuyasha. (you try editing a 10 page chapter into a 14 page chapter, which took 2 weeks and still wanna work on the same project. *sweatdrops*) but anyways, here it is! "Arnold! what are you doing in here?!" I yelled and did my best to cover up the tears that had been falling only moments earlier.  
  
He looked at me and ignored my question. "Did you know your grandmother's out there crying?"   
  
I looked at him sharply and he winced slightly causing me to back down. "She's crying?" I asked softly and felt a wave of guilt suddenly,_ My grandma. She's crying, she can't cry, not because of me..._"Go away." I ordered and turned away from him.  
  
"No." he said simply.  
  
"No?"  
  
"No."   
  
This, probably shouldn't have surprised me...  
  
"I'm not leaving until you tell me what's wrong, and why your grandma is outside that door crying." he finished folding his arms.   
  
_So she did hear me, oh great... _I muttered something under my breath.   
  
"I think you know why she's crying." he said slowly.  
  
I remained silent, arms crossed and staring straight forward.   
  
"For the same reason I'm in here."  
  
"And that would be--" I offered sarcastically.  
  
"Because you're in pain Helga."  
  
Oh No! not this time bucko! you aren't getting me to cry again. "I am not," was the feeble attempt at an argument I gave as I let my arms fall to my sides eyes momentarily unseeing.   
  
"Yes you are."  
  
I scoffed slightly and, ignoring the shaking in my voice replied "what gives you that idea?"  
  
"You're shaking Helga..." he said that's when I realized I really was shaking, he wasn't going to stop was he? My vision blurred and I closed my eyes a very unwelcome memory floating back to my mind...  
  
**_Opening my eyes and looking around in the darkness I couldn't quite make out where I was.   
  
"Mom?" I called out, my voice still scratchy from sleep.   
  
No reply came and I strained my mind, trying to remember where I was when I fell asleep, in the backseat of the car I think.   
  
I tried again, this time a note of worry seeping into my voice. "Mom, where are you?"  
  
If it was past midnight I'd be six years old, was it? Where am I?  
  
"Your mother's not here angel." A familiar voice replied and shook me out of my sleep.   
  
"Grandma?" I called curiously and the door opened, light spilling in to the darkened room illuminating the older womans form as she stepped in. "Why am I here grandma? Where are mom and dad?" I asked as she moved to the side of the bed.   
  
"They've gone away for a while sweetie, you and Olga are going to be staying here for a week or two." she said softly as she brushed my bangs out of my face.  
  
"But-but what about school? I gotta go back on Monday! I can't miss school." I argued.  
  
"I'm sorry angel, but you've got to be here for a while, it's alright, we'll call your school tomorrow and tell them you won't be back for a while."  
  
I felt my eyes water, but, school...Arnold, I wouldn't be able to see Arnold for two whole weeks! "But Grandma!"   
  
"Shh, Helga honey it's ok don't cry." she crooned and pulled me into her lap and held me close. I don't think I'd ever get used to the feeling of love that radiated from her, though I wish I could.   
  
It was a while before either of us spoke, but I finally decided to get an answer. "Grandma, why did they leave us here again?" I asked and she looked startled at first at how straight forward I was, she should be used to it by now.   
  
She reguarded me closely for a moment before sighing heavily and turning me to face her. "Your parents got into an argument again, over something or another..." she trailed away. "Well Olga called me up Tuesday night crying, said your parents were fighting. So I got gramps up and the next morning I ordered them to bring you here until they could sort things out." she said her voice shaking slightly.   
  
"Fighting again? Did mom get hurt?"   
  
"No, your father was the one to take a hit to the head this time around." sadness filling her tone as she looked down at me.   
  
I took this in for a moment and looked at her. "Are you ok grandma?"  
  
She started momentarily and then looked at me strangely. "Of course I am sweetie, I'm just fine, what about you?"  
  
"I'm fine grandma." I considered what to say, but the next thing out of my mouth was. "I'm sorry."  
  
"Sorry, sweetie! You have no reason to apologize!" she replied in a sort of worried tone.   
  
"I'm not sorry for me grandma," I started unsure of why I was saying it, but it felt right. "I'm sorry for mom and dad."   
  
She lapsed into a stunned silence and stared at me tears brimming her eyes as she sighed heavily. "Oh...Helga...Helga...my angel." she whispered and pulled me in to a deep hug and the next thing I knew I felt something wet on my head. She was crying, my grandma was crying because of me, I'd made her sad. This only made my eyes sting again, and as sleep started to fight for control I felt tears slip down my cheeks, and the last thing I remember saying was "I'm sorry..." before sleep claimed my form once more. _**  
  
I don't remember what happened after that, but I woke up the next morning grandma still holding me in her arms fast asleep leaning against the headboard of my bed.   
  
"I'm sorry..." I muttered to the memory, fists balling up unconsiously. "No...no no no." I muttered again and closed my eyes, trying to force them away. "Don't make me remember, please..." slipped out before I could stop it.   
  
~*~  
Arnolds POV  
  
"Don't make you remember what?" Now I was actually starting to regret this. Whe was pale and shaking. What was so terrible...that she'd be acting like this? What had I stepped into?  
  
No reply, why were her shoulders shaking, was she crying?   
  
I saw her sway slightly to one side. Was she going to faint?  
  
"Helga?"  
  
~*~  
Helga's POV  
  
I vaguely remember hearing Arnolds voice call my name before feeling gravity take control and myself lurch forward towards the ground, but never hitting it.   
  
It was ebbing, the pain and saddness was slowly drifting away, back to my secret place.   
  
Suddenly I opened my eyes and again I was in my arms, sort of. I was on my knees unwanted tears slipping down my face and he was next to me, pinning my arms to my chest...his arms were around me...he was-he was holding me. When did this happen?  
  
Just being near him, feeling his touch, even if for now, he drove away the demons (Ironic, since his curiosity brought them around...)  
  
"Sorry..." I heard suddenly.  
  
Whoa! Was he apologizing?  
  
"Arnold..."I murmured.  
  
~*~  
Arnolds POV  
  
Just for a little bit longer... "Helga, are you ok?" I asked, but still kept my grip on her, though I moved my hands to her shoulders.   
  
I ttook her a few moments to answer but she did. "Yes...I am now." then with my help she stood up, but kept her gaze to the floor.   
  
"Helga-I am so sorry if I brought back anything bad!" I apologized quickly.  
  
She smiled slightly and looked up at me with the first really serious look in her eyes. "It would have happened sooner or later I guess, probably better this way."   
  
At this my eyebrows rose and she faltered in her next words.   
  
"Oh! Not-that you, well...oh." she trailed off and I grinned.  
  
"It's alright Helga, I understand."  
  
"You do?" she asked in that confused yet hopeful tone she took every so often.  
  
"Yeah, if this would have happened when you were...oh say in that tree it could have been worse." I said to help her feel a bit more comfortable.  
  
This brought a smile to her face and after a moment of introspection she suddenly burst into laughter, which startled me. "Helga?"   
  
She laughed a little more then shook her head and calmed slightly (Note I said 'slightly') "When you said that, I got a sudden picture of me falling from where I was and getting caught in a branch upside down for a while...it struck me as funny." she said and attempted to stop her laughter but it only got worse.  
  
This only made me smile, but--then the image of a very perturbed looking Helga hanging upside down from a branch in the dark calling for help popped into my head and I let out a choked laugh which made her fall silent, then we both laughed a bit more before caling down and falling into silence.   
  
And when she spoke again, there was a certain peace in her tone, "Wow Arnold, you really don't know how good that felt."  
  
"What." I asked slowly.  
  
"To laugh and it truely be jovial for the first time in--oh years!" she exclaimed then grinned.   
  
"What are you grinning at?" I asked in slight suspicion.  
  
"Nothing." she replied then made her way to the door, unlocked it and peeked out and I heard. "It's all right Grandma, everythings ok now." a pause. "Yes I'm sure." she looked back in to the room at me, then back out. "Arnold just--helped me out, again."  
  
With this I smiled as well and she looked back at me and opened the door with a small smile. If I couldn't get her to tell me now what was going on, then I'd let her in her own time, and I guess for now just be here for her when she needs me, or lets me within 10 feet of her.   
  
-------  
Possibly the shortest ending, and the lamest thing you'll ever read on the face of the fanfiction world. (I'm in Daria mode, don't mind me.)  
  
Anyways, it's a hold over till I can get something worth-while out, but it's something isn't it? *shrugs*  
  
(update)  
Gah, I just realized how incredibly short that was. And I just noticed something, is it just me, or does Arnold seem to be sort of like... a stress reliever there? *blinks* great now an idea's worked its way into my mind. Gah!! *covers her head*  
  
Just don't kill me ok?  
  
Special shout out to all my reviewers of ALL my chapters... but more importantly to those who have yelled at me to get my butt back in gear..  
  
_That Sock in the Fridge (Tano, i-luv-mark, Todd, zali, Angela Inferna, Beady, Eyah, AuAu. _  
  
Thanks to all you guys! And I hope you haven't lost faith in me. I'm a wandering writer you realize? I'm still trying to get my mind to stay on one track, but it's hard.   
  
And it'll only get harder from here, because high-schools coming to an end for me *sniffles* and I start Tech College this Fall. That and I may have to get a job this summer *gasp of horror* my first! Wah!   
  
But anyways. Please guys, have patience and faith in me, because I'm trying. If you'd see the other stories on my profile you'd see they're all driving me insane (Yugioh, Harry Potter, Inuyasha) It's just going pff... on me..   
  
*sighs heavily*  
  
Just bear with me. I promise I'll behave, even if I have to sit down and force another 6 pager out of my head for you guys.   
  
I'll try!  
  
I swear to god I will *bows* Just all take care ne?  



	12. AN: I LIVE! No really, I'm still here

Authors Notes from the DEAD:

So, after a good….6? year hiatus, I'm baaaaaaaaaacccckkkkk

Be afraid – Be VERY afraid. Hell, I'm terrified.

So…here's the last 6 years in a nutshell:

Graduating College, Getting a Boyfriend (and now Fiancé) moving away from my parents, dealing with depression, two car accidents, a suicide, H1N1 in the entire apartment, temporarily being homeless then living in a place that was basically homeless (120 year old Farmhouse with NO INSULATION) for 8 months after they decided to demolish our apartment complex, getting a job, getting a 2nd job, losing the first job and now finally moving one last time… (here in like.. a month)

I kid you not – and that's just the major bombshell stuff.  
(Not counting the 5 massive years I've been playing World of Warcraft… *cough cough *)

If there happens to be somebody out there still checking on this fic, give me a couple of weeks and I'll start reposting better – EDITED – chapters. I've come back to this story like… 3 times in the past couple of years and started reading it and was like "WTF! Why did I end it there?! How could you STUPID!" so… yeah… now I'm done being stupid, and I shall update. I still have the ending buried away on a Data DVD along with 15 years of stories, poems and what not that I've collected ;P

No, seriously. I'm actually doing it this time, and I won't post again until I know it's completely finished and done, and ready to be posted.

So, if this story suddenly disappears and you start seeing a new story being posted that looks familiar… you know why… *squeal*

So yeah, be prepared because 4 years has really messed with my writing skills, for the better I would THINK – but I really. …. REALLY like psychologically messing with people, so I shall… do that woo..

Now, as it's 5am where I am, time to go…*bows*

Love you ALL!


End file.
